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 Posted: Wed Aug 15, 2007 2:23 pm
hello i'm very shy and quiet but i want to be more outgoing and friendly. i want to make new friends but the problem with me is i care too much what other people think of me. like when i go out to the mall or something and i see other people out there i immediately think of what they think of me. how i dress, if i look like a nerd, if im short etc. i really want to know not to worry about these things.
so please help and your advice will be greatly appreciated.
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Posted: Thu Aug 16, 2007 6:16 am
The only way to overcome shyness is to be in social situations where you have to talk.
Affirmations - a lot of them. Tell yourself that you are good in social situations and confident. It works.
If you are not sure you believe affirmations really work, just think about the "negative affirmations" you might have accepted as truth in your life. "You're useless/stupid/pathetic/an idiot." You can learn to believe their exact opposites if you hear them every bit as often, and that is where affirmations come in.
Some people are just quiet. Especially to people they do not know. Some people just think more than they talk. Your friends and family will just get used to it.
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Posted: Thu Aug 16, 2007 7:40 pm
RatTurd The only way to overcome shyness is to be in social situations where you have to talk. Affirmations - a lot of them. Tell yourself that you are good in social situations and confident. It works. If you are not sure you believe affirmations really work, just think about the "negative affirmations" you might have accepted as truth in your life. "You're useless/stupid/pathetic/an idiot." You can learn to believe their exact opposites if you hear them every bit as often, and that is where affirmations come in. Some people are just quiet. Especially to people they do not know. Some people just think more than they talk. Your friends and family will just get used to it. thanks for the advice, but what does affirmation mean? sweatdrop
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Posted: Thu Aug 16, 2007 9:29 pm
affirmation
n 1: a statement asserting the existence or the truth of
something [syn: avowal]
2: the act of affirming or asserting or stating something [syn:
assertion, statement]
3: a solemn declaration that serves the same purpose as an oath
(if an oath is objectionable to the person on religious or
ethical grounds)
4: a judgment by a higher court that the judgment of a lower
court was correct and should stand [ant: reversal]
Basically, If you're making an affirmation to yourself, you are saying something about yourself that you believe or are trying to believe whatever.
Say there is a kid that's kind of weird, so everyone starts calling stupid. Then whenever something goes wrong, he starts taking it out on himself, and calling himself stupid, and before you know it, he thinks he is stupid. This can work the other way to. Statements that can either build you up or tear you down, depending on what they are.
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Posted: Fri Aug 17, 2007 1:38 pm
ahh...i get it..
so it's kind of like telling myself positive things like, "i'm not stupid, no one is better or worse than me because we're all the same in the Lord's eyes." right?
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Posted: Fri Aug 17, 2007 9:31 pm
x3_heartzz ahh...i get it.. so it's kind of like telling myself positive things like, "i'm not stupid, no one is better or worse than me because we're all the same in the Lord's eyes." right? Learning to think "whatever happens, I can handle it" to yourself in moments of stress/panic/fear will have a noticeable difference for you during social situations. The more you do them the more you consciously believe it and therefore become that affirmation. They certainly seem to work for people.
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Posted: Sun Aug 19, 2007 11:52 am
x3_heartzz hello i'm very shy and quiet but i want to be more outgoing and friendly. i want to make new friends but the problem with me is i care too much what other people think of me. like when i go out to the mall or something and i see other people out there i immediately think of what they think of me. how i dress, if i look like a nerd, if im short etc. i really want to know not to worry about these things. so please help and your advice will be greatly appreciated. do you look like a nerd? are you short? it really doen't matter some people can look past your shell and see the greatness within be true to your heat of hearts and be proud of who you are
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