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 Posted: Wed May 16, 2007 3:54 am
-sigh- Lana and I are going to be friends...
She kind of forced me into a conversation with her girlfriend and I really didn't want to be there, though...
And when I tried to just joke around with her, she thought I was trying to make her unfaithful to her girlfriend so I could show her....
I dunno, being unfaithful never seemed to be something she didn't want to do.
But I still wish she'd leave her for me... Maybe she'll realize I'm the right girl for her....
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Posted: Wed May 16, 2007 5:53 am
Stop it Moo! You are inviting trouble into your life and going to make yourself miserable. Lana is a terrible person! You deserve so much better. Stop dragging drama into your life. It's unhealthy.
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Posted: Wed May 16, 2007 1:18 pm
I cant even begin to tell you how disappointed I am in you Moo. You know better.
And let me just say, she didn't force you to do s**t. You did it yourself and you're causing this trouble for yourself. I'm not going to stress myself out trying to keep you happy over something YOU did yourself.
You're on your own on this one kid.
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Posted: Wed May 16, 2007 5:00 pm
MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, she's an evil b***h, don't talk to her!! She's just trying to screw with your head with her thoughtless trickery. Keep telling yourself that, don't forget it! >__< On a brighter note, I scanned my DRAWING OF MYSELF AND MY BAAAABBBY! We're broken up right now. But we'll get back together again eventually! I just know it!! >__< Anyway, here it is. <3 (posted it in the art subforum so I can keep track of it razz - oh, and I'm the one with straight hair. Yes, I'm the shy one xd . And yes. She really does have that much hair. XD) 
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Posted: Wed May 16, 2007 5:38 pm
I JUST DON'T KNOW HOW TO BE HAPPY ANYMORE...
I know this won't work, but I have to try...
If it doesn't make me feel any better, it'll kill me.
And honestly, everyone's better off.
Your ex looks like mine.
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Posted: Wed May 16, 2007 9:52 pm
Mmmkay.
Am I crazy, or is weird that one of my closest friends rationalized ignoring me allll ******** week with the fact that it was out of MY best interests. <********?
She made me go through hell and now she's feeding me these s**t lies.
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Posted: Thu May 17, 2007 2:43 am
I swear to ******** god..
I'm just going to kill myself.
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Posted: Thu May 17, 2007 9:19 am
AkureiKnight I swear to ******** god.. I'm just going to kill myself. Please don't, Onee-san... You're my big sister, my role model... You wouldn't set a good example for me... And I really don't think I'd survive without you, big sister...
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Posted: Thu May 17, 2007 5:45 pm
Moo - Awww. Then you can understand how I think that head full of curly hair is the prettiest thing on earth. <3
No one's killing herself... *grabs Akurei by shirt collar* Not even YOOOU. o___0 Or you'll have me to deal with when I die. xd (Funny for me to say, since I did trudge to my car through a rainstorm the other day just hoping lightning would strike me and put me out of misery. -___- But it's better now, I guess.)
Well, you guys, I've officially found a song that makes me cry every single time I listen to it. It just reminds me so much of the time when we were both just so happily in love with each other... and now everything's just broken...
The song is off of the new Avril CD, and regardless of how much you may HATE Avril (most people do, I've noticed), the song is beautiful. It's called "Innocence."
Lyrics to the chorus:
This innocence is brilliant;
I hope that it will stay;
This moment is perfect;
Please don't go away;
I need you now...
And I'll hold on to it;
Don't you let it pass you by
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Posted: Thu May 17, 2007 10:08 pm
AkureiKnight I swear to ******** god.. I'm just going to kill myself.
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Posted: Fri May 18, 2007 5:50 am
NO ONE IS ******** KILLING THEMSELVES. OKAY?! YOU GUYS ALWAYS ******** TOLD ME "EEH, NO, DON'T DO IT, WE LOVE YOU." AND s**t, AND NOW YOU GUYS ALL THINK THAT NO ONE CARES ABOUT YOU OR SOME s**t? GODDAMNIT. NO KILLING YOURSELVES. OR I SWEAR TO GOD I'LL GO RIGHT TO YOUR HOUSE, AND MAKE YOU WISH YOU WERE DEAD. O_O
...That is all.
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Posted: Fri May 18, 2007 11:36 am
Okay, well. I think I figured out why the breakup hurts so much and why the pain isn't going away. All my life, everyone I've met, family and friends included, have made me feel like I am not good enough the way I am. There's always something about me that's bad or wrong or stupid or needs to be changed... and she was the only one who ever made me feel like I didn't have to change, that I was good enough and it made me feel secure and happy... and no matter what, even if I was friends with her, there will always be the feeling that I just wasn't good enough for her too... that I just wasn't something enough for her to want to keep me as a girlfriend... I don't think anyone out there is ever gonna have the capacity to make me feel like that again, the feeling that I was okay, that I was good... just me. But I guess she didn't really put me ahead of anything in her life... then again, I never expected anyone to.
I just wish I could get in touch with her right now...
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Posted: Fri May 18, 2007 1:57 pm
I've always felt that way my whole life too..
Only, I've never met anyone like that. Well, maybe one person but I never even got a ******** chance with her. That's because I have to move there.. and there is no way I can.
And no one is ******** dying Moo. Calm down. I wasn't really being serious, it sarcasm because I was angry (still am). Even though I'm not feeling too hot and I have no one that can actually make me feel better.
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Posted: Fri May 18, 2007 2:47 pm
BakaTulip Okay, well. I think I figured out why the breakup hurts so much and why the pain isn't going away. All my life, everyone I've met, family and friends included, have made me feel like I am not good enough the way I am. There's always something about me that's bad or wrong or stupid or needs to be changed... and she was the only one who ever made me feel like I didn't have to change, that I was good enough and it made me feel secure and happy... and no matter what, even if I was friends with her, there will always be the feeling that I just wasn't good enough for her too... that I just wasn't something enough for her to want to keep me as a girlfriend... I don't think anyone out there is ever gonna have the capacity to make me feel like that again, the feeling that I was okay, that I was good... just me. But I guess she didn't really put me ahead of anything in her life... then again, I never expected anyone to. I just wish I could get in touch with her right now... You know, same here, sort of. And I still hang around her to try to make myself feel better - plus she SAID she wanted back in the relationship eventually, but she just... isn't acting like it. People keep saying "You'll find someone better, someone you'll love even more" -- I'll never find anyone better, and even if I could, I wouldn't WANT to love anyone more. So being near her makes me feel even worse. I went to her house for the first time today since the breakup. I sat on her bed, she left the room for something; I just looked around thinking "There's the TV. We used to leave that TV on the food channel all night even though we never watched it." "There are her posters all over the wall. I remember when she used to tell me who was who in each poster and then just sort of smile at me." "There are all of the Horse Illustrated magazines I loaned her, still on her bookshelf." "There's the teddy bear I gave her for Valentine's day... I wonder if she still sleeps with it; probably not." "...This is the bed we used to sleep in. This is where we used to be so supremely intimate that I'd cry just because it was so incredible to see her look at me that way.." "...And there's the doorway where she used to kiss me good-bye." I just sat there and cried; she sighed, flopped down next to me, and looked nervous... And then her parents got home. And then I left. And cried the whole way home. Why does everything have to hurt so much? neutral
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Posted: Fri May 18, 2007 4:23 pm
Sooooo...Dilema:
There's a girl I met online a while ago, and we've talked a lot. She's nice...well, quite frankly she's flat-out the most awesome chick I've ever known. Last night, she told me she was in love with me. Thing is that I don't want any long distance relationships. I've tried those and they always go and/or end poorly. I don't know what to do!
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