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His gaze shifted from the books to rest on her for a moment, but the mixture of longing and pain cast his gaze off towards the opposite side of the bar, "And it might just bait you along with a single piece of information one day after all your searching, get you hooked, and trap you in an endless spiral of research and cross-referencing, a nightmare indeed. Though if you do happen to learn all the truth there may be to learn about this god forsaken place, what then?"

Tac gave a shrug, "The egeneral way I've been bred to defend things is by blowing the other s**t the hell up. Like I said, perhaps get someone to summon things for you, barricades, defenses, weaponry. I wouldn't mind a MEC Gattling Guass set up on a tripod and locked in place." He gave a shrug, blowing s**t up here didn't seem like the best solution, "Tell me, what if you learn these secrets and they don't help worth a damn? You take the time to learn what you can and in the end it means so very little. Would that mean you learned the wrong secrets? Would it mean you learned incorrectly? Might it mean that what you think is the whole is just a piece of the puzzle?" A hand rose as he head turned to her, the shades sliding down to reveal his mostly violet eyes, "What happens if learning the secrets shows you something horrible about your home, hmm? You learned one 'home' was wrong, what if this one is too?"

His gaze seemed deathly cold, "Nearly killed you, aye. I'll remember that, if I can forget how you looked broken that first time I came back afterwards. You don't remember it. For you, it never happened. When you left that time, I knew your fate. Nearly killed, heh, indeed." He slid the shades back up and looked back across the bar. He pressed on as if nothing had happened, "Its a risk, aye. Though, do you really think you could handle it if the Brink turned out to be something dark and sinister? You'd be becoming a part of that, if it were the case. They say ignorance is bliss, but once the ignorance and innocence is gone, it can't ever come back. You were given that ignorance back, just consider that."

He didn't look to her, but his words came forfully at first, "You are not dark and sinister. There is nothing of the sort about you. For as long as I've known you, its never been a part of who you are. If you had never come to the Brink, never known about the threat on us all, never had to go through the pain of knowing a god DAMNED fool like me, would your life as First Rank Officer and all that been different? If you never learned of the extent of your own ignorance, would it have even affected you at all? When ignorance hides you from pain, sometimes its worth it." His eyes were hidden again, almost purposefully so.

A flash of violet could be seen behind the shades as he turned to look at her, but only as much as he had to in order to actually see her. He seemed to be able to only squeeze out a few prescious words, "All o-....Why?"

His gaze fell down to the bar, his eyes hidden once more, "Your time here has been a teacher like none any of us have likely ever had, with you just a pupil. Do you fancy yourself a teacher as well? You've learned so much, but you've also taught others along the way. You're a kind soul, Cora, and so much more. You saved me, and not just from the taint that sought to consume me." He pushed off the bar and turned to leave, "I learned that you're a stronger person than I'll ever be, and not merely in terms of muscle and endurance. Your life and your world was revealed as a lie and here you stand, accepting it. I lost you and it is tearing me apart. I still love you, Cora, and I've also learned I can't change that." A slow clomp of boots marked his passage as he began to weave through tables and chairs.

He didn't stop at first, the body's name falling on deaf ears, but when she called him Tacitus he stopped dead. His head fell, though he didn't turn back, "I know...but I've lost you, lost you to A-alex, and no amount of appologies can change that. If you've found love again, all I can say is that I'm happy for you, for I truly am. I love you with all my heat and soul can muster, and that sets your happiness above all other things, even my own desire." He cast a glance back to her, eyes hidden still, the desire to stay and be with her, even if only in casual conversation, combatting the receeding pain of looking upon her.