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Sito Sama

PostPosted: Thu Apr 12, 2007 8:51 am


Sanee
Hot Spring Horror! : A NarutoxHinata semi-crack fanfic.

A/N's
'....' = thoughts

Note: This gets pretty vulgar. Cursing and explicit references. Handle with care.


Naruto (or rather, "Naruko", his Oiroke no jutsu form) enters the girls' side of the hot spring

Naruto : (thinking to himself) 'Hee hee, I wonder which attractive girl I'll see today. This has to be one of my best ideas yet!'

Sakura and Ino walk in, gossiping about Sasuke or other BS, oblivious to "Naruto's ogling eyes.

Sakura: ...So that's the deal then? We share Sasuke?
Ino: Okay! I call him on any days that end in "y"! heart
Sakura: Hey! No fair Ino pig! scream
Naruto: (Thinking to "herself" )'Ooh~! Catfight, nyaa~' (Does his signature grin as a slight pink tinge spreads across "her" cheeks.)

Sakura and Ino both notice the "gifted" female nin sitting across the way

Ino: (whispering to Sakura) Hmm...I've never seen her before. Should we talk to her?

Sakura: (Thinking) 'Hnn... She looks oddly familiar. Isn't that Naruto-dobe's perverted jutsu? No way, even he wouldn't be that stupid to sneak in here.' (Replies to Ino) Yeah, I think we can trust her.

Ino: (Yelling out) Oi! You over there! What's your name?

Naruto: (Tries frantically to hide any distress) Uh uh uh.... Naruko!

Ino: That's quite a name, there. Y'know, I've never seen you here before.Where ya from?

Naruko: Uhh, I'm ...uh...visiting my cousin! 'Yeah, that's it!' You happen to know Uzumaki Naruto? Yeah, (starts to BS) he's pretty handsome, ne? I'd totally get with him if he weren't my cousin! mrgreen

Sakura: stressed stressed stressed
Heh. Lets just say we...don't get along very well.

Naruko: 'Oh geez. Now she's gonna start spewing s**t about me from her fat vampire mouth!'

Sakura: (Tries to stop thinking about him.)

Ino: So, new girl, do you like to play matchmaker? It's really fun!

Naruko: Err. I don't really get into that sort of thing. Plus, I don't really know anyone here....

Ino: That's a shame! Say Sakura, who's your favortie pair right now?

Sakura: Well, to be honest, I'm not actaully trying to make a crack pairing like I usually do. I am currently obsessed with the idea of getting the world's most perfect couple, Naruto and Hinata, together! I won't settle for failure!

Naruko: eek 'I've never heard of that idea before. D:
I mean, I really wouldn't mind it...Heh heh...but she seems more scared of me than anything.'

Ino: I know! I wonder if Naruto even notices why Hinata is so shy around him? Everyone in Konoha knows that she has a major crush on him! (Lowers voice)...But I really do not see what she sees in him. Does she have a thing for stupidity?

Naruko: 'Wow. I...never even knew. I wish I could say something. '
(His deep breathing becomes audible, and a definite blush appears on "her" face.)

Both girls are oblivious to Naruto's condition from the heated discussion.

Sakura: You've gotten the major crush part right. I read her diary once and...wow. I don't think I saw a page that wasn't about Naruto. Man, so many pages of how she hoped that he'd notice her, how she's been trying to say something to him....

Ino: Man, that makes me support them even more! Hinata really deserves to be happy, even if her happiness is in the form of that dumbass.

Sakura: Wait! Lemme finish! She got really crazy about him too! Really fangirlish s**t! Like, she put the names of their kids, she filled at least 5 pages with "Uzumaki Hinata Uzumaki Hinata Uzumaki Hinata Uzumaki Hinata Uzumaki Hinata...", and let's not forget about those erotic scenarios of what she wanted Naruto to do to her on some hot, steamy nights....
It honestly scared the ******** out of me. emo

Ino: .............

Naruko: 'EROTIC? Oh man, I'm in some deep s**t. I have to get out of here before I "react" to that...Uh oh. Too late.
(He gets a massive nosebleed, which careens him to the bottom of the hotspring with a resounding "CRASH!")

All the water splashes out of the tub, and Ino and Sakura both develop prize-winning "WTF?" expressions as they gave onto the almost naked form a Naruto, sporting a huge erection , with his mouth ajar and his left eye twitching frantically.

Both: NA-RU-TO!!!!!!!

Sakura: I will KILL YOU!

Naruto: s**t! Best idea ever my a**! I'm so humilated!

Ino: You'll be more than humiliated when we get done with you! scream
Gladiator!

Naruto proceeds to run out of the wrecked onsen, with Ino and Sakura in tow. Think of Benny Hill chase scenes.


'Hokay. That's enough for now. I'll probably update this, but I'd really like to see what you guys think. (Plus, my hands are tired, and I need to think of a happy ending, possibly. I 'uuno. I don't know if I want Naruto to go through more hell. Though, I'll feel bad, since he's my man-sexy.
-Poses-
Hinata: Die! scream
Me : Eheh, sorry. sweatdrop )

(Oh yeah, this is way more that just a "skit" Sorry.)

lmao, that was realy funny and clever I loved it heart You should do some more *nudge nudge* blaugh
PostPosted: Thu Apr 12, 2007 9:26 pm


Shhesh! What happened to "Keep it clean"? Ah well.... I'm gonna come up with a skit now to keep it in balance.

Umm...

Shu-Nya

Wheezing Prophet


Shu-Nya

Wheezing Prophet

PostPosted: Fri Apr 13, 2007 2:01 am


I got nothin sweatdrop
PostPosted: Fri Apr 13, 2007 5:41 am


All these are pretty fun to read. x3

Too bad my brain in seemingly on vacation, because I had a good one just the other day... -pokes-

ll --SakuraKatana -- ll

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PurrfectGirl

PostPosted: Thu Apr 26, 2007 7:55 am


Thier all sooo funny!! I heart NaruHina!!!
PostPosted: Fri Apr 27, 2007 1:37 pm


Shu-Nya
I got nothin sweatdrop

XD neither do I.

x_Emerald Hearts_x


Sanee

PostPosted: Fri Apr 27, 2007 5:00 pm


Shu-Nya
Shhesh! What happened to "Keep it clean"? Ah well.... I'm gonna come up with a skit now to keep it in balance.

Umm...
Sorry. >>

If I write another one, I'll make it cleaner.

But it seriously wasn't that bad. C'mon, it could've been hentai or something. I don't think that amount of swear words will hurt you.

Everyone: Thanks for the comments! mrgreen
PostPosted: Mon Apr 30, 2007 5:26 pm


I don't think I will be continuing with my "Hot Spring Horror" skit-fic. I've thought about it, and I can't really think of how to continue on with the story.Even if I do, it will probably be dirty, and not in favor with at least some of the members of the guild. So...I guess I'll keep it clean from now on. (If I do continue with the skit-fic, and you'd like to see it, PM me. I'd rather post it if you wouldn't be offended by the content. sweatdrop )

Okay, now onto a new skit I thought of last night/while walking home today ;DDDD :

(After a mission is over, Hinata and Naruto decide to rest at a quiet spot in the woods before they get to Konoha. A river about 50 feet away flows peacefully....)

Naruto: Wow! This is such a nice peaceful place. Great idea, Hinata!

Hinata: Ah, no problem. (She starts to blush as a small grin spreads across her face.)

Naruto: I'm a bit hungry. Are you Hinata? I was thinking I could go catch a couple of fish for us in that river over there.

Hinata: Sounds good, Naruto-kun. I'll stay here and get a fire started.

Naruto: (He starts walking away, but then stops in his tracks) Ah, don't want to get this wet. (He takes his jacket off, leaving him in his black undershirt. He then sets the jacket down near Hinata and then runs off.)

Hinata: Oh! Maybe I should fold this for him so it doesn't get wrinkled. (She grabs both arms of the jacket, but then stops as she notices something.) That wonderful aroma...What is it? It's not me...is it this jacket? (She slowly starts sniffing the collar, and finds that her guess was correct.) Ahh...I didn't realize that Naruto gave off such a wonderful musky smell. I wonder if it's just me who notices it? Well, while I'm still here by myself, I should take this opportunity, to pretend that I am actually smelling the scent from its beautiful source. Mmmmm....

(Naruto comes back with a few dead fish in tow, when he becomes a bit startled from this sight.)

Naruto: Umm...Hinata? Why exactly are you sniffing my jacket?

(Hinata starts panicking since she isn't able to think of a good excuse.)

Hinata: Umm...you see... I...

Naruto: Ah, I guess it's not really a problem. It's just strange, since I'd think you'd be the last person to do that. But I guess I can be wrong, happily.

Hinata: ...I thought you'd think I was a creep for doing this. It is your jacket, after all.

Naruto: (He puts the fish on the flame, then sits next to Hinata.)
No, I wouldn't. You're the last person I'd ever think was creepy. Now, um, ( He starts to blush a little bit)...if you want something better than that jacket, I can give it to you, for keeps even.

Hinata: (She becomes confused at Naruto's last statement.) What could it possibly be?

(Without a word, Naruto suddenly draws Hinata close to his body and puts one hand protectively on Hinata's head, stroking it gently.)

Naruto: To answer your question Hinata, you can have me.
I love you, and I've loved you for a while now.

Hinata: I...can't believe this is happening.

Naruto: I think you should. Stop doubting yourself. Now, are you going to kiss me, or what?

Hinata: Ah, I love you too Naruto! I've loved you ever since our days at the academy. Of course, I will kiss you.

(Naruto and Hinata lock lips. Meanwhile, she breathes in Naruto's musky scent as he strokes his fingers through her hair. Even though the fish has since burned, even that couldn't ruin this perfect moment between two destined lovers.)

End.

A/N: Sorry if this moved too fast for you. I meant for this story to take place during the Shippuden years, after Naruto and Hinata have developed a solid friendship. Besides, a skit allows me the opportunity to skew the couple devlopment faster. >;DDD

Oh, sorry if this isn't a funny skit. I really felt like fluff, and I knew you guys would like the fluff, too.
(Maybe the title of the thread should just be "NaruHina skits". My opinion, though. sweatdrop )

Sanee


x_Emerald Hearts_x

PostPosted: Tue May 01, 2007 4:50 pm


I agree. ninja Someone remove the funny part! 3nodding

By the way, that was a great skit. ^_^ I'm betting Naruto planned that! xd
PostPosted: Wed May 02, 2007 4:22 pm


Hinata is in her room lying on her bed its about 10 o' clock at night.
Hinata: * sigh* Why am i so scared? ... * a tear rolls down her cheek*
Suddently her window flys open, shes a little startled to see Gaara.
Hinata: PLZ DONT KILL ME!!!! crying
Gaara: dont worry i wont hurt you, I was really bored and i was looking for Naruto. smile
Hinata: Then why the are you here.... confused
Gaara: Weel since he's in love with you and ......Oh, well i might as well show you * He suddently wraps his sand around her*
They arrive at Naruto'house.
Hinata: Why are we here?
Gaara: Ill show you....
Gaara elevates the 2 to Narutos Window. She looks inside to see His walls covered with pictures of Hinata all over his wall. Gaara used his sand to pull a journal into Hinata's hands. She looked inside.
" Gosh why does she hate me so much everytime I try to ask her out, she runs away or faints... Gosh, She must really hate me..... emo " Today i was about to ask her out but then Kiba pulled her away to go train... She probably likes him, Who would like me?!? crying "
Gaara pulled the book away from her and set it back in its place.
Hinata: wow,I didnt know he felt that way... All this time I've been giving him the wrong impression....
Gaara: what do you mean?
Hinata: I mean i love him soooo much but im so scared to talk to him...
Gaara: Well you just did! biggrin
Hinata: huh?
Suddently there is a poof and she blushes VERY hard to notice Naruto was pretending to be Gaara. His hand shot outward and smashed his face into hers. Hinata Blushins wildly will Naruto's pretty much eating her face. He breaks away blushing.
All the Chunin: YAAAYYYY!!! HE FINALLY DID IT!!!!!!
Everyone is throwing Confetti and clapping.
Hinata: If your not Gaara then how are we staying up here....
Naruto: He's over there!
Naruto gasps as he sees Gaara Past out from all the commotion. Suddently the sand rushes over to Gaara.
Hinata and Naruto: AAAHHHH!
Theyfall thru the air.
Naruto: ill protect you!!
He grabs Hinata
* BOOM*
Naruto and Hinata fall in a dumpster
Naruto: ow...
Hinata; thank you Naruto...
They kiss once more....
Naruto: well so do you want to be my girl?...* Pulls out a ring*
Hinata: ask me again once we get out.. 3nodding
Naruto: oh!
Naruto jumps out and pulls Hinata out.
Naruto : so do you want to--
Suddently thier kissing again,*Hinata says into the kiss* Yes.. I do* her lips brushing agianst Naruto's *
He pulls away and puts the ring on her finger, Blushing .He picks her up and takes her to her house.
Naruto: Well Ill see you tomorrow..* He leans in to kiss her, but Hinata puts her fingers up to his lips*
Hinata: You can spend the night here if you want... heart whee heart We are Chunin and dont live with our parents anymore. * Hinata grabs naruto and pulls him inside* Plus were engaged. whee
Naruto: You read my mind.. redface wink

PurrfectGirl


PurrfectGirl

PostPosted: Wed May 02, 2007 4:28 pm


I hope its not that bad.. Im 13 and this is the first time ive done this.... Sorry about the whole eat her face thing, Ive watched the Notebook too many times redface
PostPosted: Wed May 02, 2007 5:08 pm


Thanks, Emerald. This was my second skit, and I was worried that I moved too fast.
Ahh, I didn't meant for him to plan it, but that's a nice insight. Maybe he did, and I didn't realize it. ninja

That skit was good for your first time, Purrfect. Mine was probably a lot dirtier than yours. I loved that ending though, where they both agree to "spend the night with each other" [end euphenism]. xd

Sanee


PurrfectGirl

PostPosted: Thu May 03, 2007 2:49 pm


Sankyu redface , I thought no one would like it....
PostPosted: Thu May 03, 2007 7:18 pm


PurrfectGirl
Sankyu redface , I thought no one would like it....

I like it. 3nodding It was clever.

x_Emerald Hearts_x

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