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Elliptic Sin

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PostPosted: Mon Dec 06, 2010 8:58 pm


Like what he did exactly to get food? And then move to how he received the letter afterward?

I was going to add something of the like to his history [ like he joined in to some kind of group or he picked up on it on his own] but I don't truly know where to go from there.

The idea was that maybe he did what he had to do to survive [what exactly? I'm not sure. And I'm not sure how far I want to go with this character. So that's to be determined...] and he gets caught, gets in trouble, and then he mets someone kinda kind to help him out...

But as to how he receives the letter from the school at this point...I'm at a loss. I have to admit that I didn't think that far through....:sweat
PostPosted: Mon Dec 06, 2010 9:05 pm


As Shauna said, it might be good to mention something about what he'd been doing till Ever After got to him. Perhaps what you might want to do is have him become a loanshark; pretty shady business having to cut deals that others may not want to fulfill in the end (sounds like a certain devil character eh?). Perhaps one of his "clients" is a representative of Ever After and that's how he found out about them. As for why he joined...well that's up to you. Also, I want to ask about making Sierra and Marcel best friends. I love this character and I really see them clicking together.

They both had the rich upper life though left unloved...I can see them trying to find something in each other. Not that they would EVER mention it at all. Doesn't have to be romantic, but they'd - and this is from my perspective so forgive me if I'm overstepping - want some sort of connection. Probably to tell themselves that yes, they are worth something. No games or societal perspectives to deal with. Sierra would never ever cry but if she felt the need to, she'd lean on his shoulder and take really deep breaths. And he'd probably just stand there waiting for her to get over it or talk about it. And if he looked like he needed someone for a while, she'd offer him tea and wait for him to get over it or talk about it in return...or get impatient and ask anyways while plotting ways of making it better.

Isa-sama


Arthuritis592

PostPosted: Mon Dec 06, 2010 11:43 pm


Just so everyone knows, I'm about 2/5 of the way through constructing Ephraim (The Sorcerer's Apprentice) and will hopefully have a finished product for you tomorrow (thursday at the latest).
PostPosted: Tue Dec 07, 2010 4:22 am


xP

The sorcerer's apprentice! I just saw that movie last week....I loved it! (Though I have to admit that I haven't read his fairytale....)

And, yeah, explain how he kept himself alive, basically....and I like Isa's idea about the whole loanshark thing.....

shauna_marie

Vicious Cutie-Pie


Arthuritis592

PostPosted: Tue Dec 07, 2010 9:25 am


Haha, I actually found it on the fairy tale list
The Master and His Pupil
^That is just an adaptation of the ballad, "The Sorcerer's Apprentice" written by Goethe in 1797.
Which is right here v
The Sorcerer's Apprentice

I didn't know it was an actual fairy tale either, but I had to take it when I found it. mrgreen
PostPosted: Tue Dec 07, 2010 9:32 am


A loan shark? That...could work. I would have to change the age a little bit and then work the exact reason he would think of going to the school in there as well...but I could work that out. The age change is mainly because I can't think of a 12 year old jumping from just moving around on the streets to loan sharking but...maybe the current age could still work? I mean, it is desperate messures and all that....

And that's cool, I think that Sierra and Marcel could get along pretty well. In their own off beat kind of way. It would be interesting to see them interact.

The Sorcerer's Apprentice? I've watched the cartoon I've seen the movie...but I've never known that there was a fairytale about it. If I did I would have read the book before watching both of them...I feel like I have been missing out of something....

Elliptic Sin

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shauna_marie

Vicious Cutie-Pie

PostPosted: Tue Dec 07, 2010 9:37 am


Sweet....my dad is actually re-watching the movie right now...
I can't wait to read that profile... xp

And, Elliptic...something else he could be is an associate of a loan shark instead of one himself....except he ends up stealing from said loan shark....it could work, a man take him in to help with his dirty work...
PostPosted: Tue Dec 07, 2010 11:19 am


.::The Sorcerer's Apprentice::.

User Image
b a s i c i n f o r m a t i o n


Hello, My name is
    Ephraim Venefice

I Have Been on this Earth for About
    Seventeen Years

I am of the
    Male Gender

I'm staying in dorm number
    Blue 5

I'm currently enrolled in grade number
    Twelve


c o l o r m e p r e t t y


How I Normally Look
    Ephraim stands at about 6'1” and always has perfect posture without ever looking as if he is trying. He has clear lightly tanned skin that is roughened by the elements and his refusal to properly care for it. His activity in aerobic sports, mostly swimming and tennis, has made him very lean with hard compact muscles. He has wide shoulders that come down to a thin waist. He's a sight to see in a bathing suit, which you will have plenty of time to do during the swimming season. He is much stronger than he looks.

    All of his features are angular, but this is most evident in his face with a sharp jawline that contrasts to his softer chin. His cheeks are almost sallow but not so much to cause any concern. His bow lips are usually slightly chapped which may or may not result in Ephraim remembering to buy some chap stick. His piercing green eyes are framed by lifted brows that give him a constant questioning look. He has medium length, layered, dark brown hair that is only tousled after his shower to style it.

    His style with clothes rather matches his hair—stylish but hastily thrown together in a way that usually results in a sort of charming look. He usually wears polos, hoodies and jeans because of their comfort and simplicity. He has a few popular name brand items from Hollister, American Eagle and the like. Clothing is not that important to him, so he does not really pay attention to fashion at all.

    The pads of his left hand fingers are calloused from playing violin, as is the area between his right thumb and pointer finger where he grips the bow. He has white teeth, all of which are straight due to the braces he had from seventh grade until the beginning of freshmen year. His smile is reflective of those years with the metal invaders and as such he usually uses a crooked smirk that doesn't show any teeth at all. When he's really happy, he smiles a full smile and you can see that he truly has an infectious grin.

Fairytale Appearance
    His fairytale appearance is not vastly different. Mostly, he is dressed in the clothing of the apprentices that came before him. At this point, they are blue-grey robes with flat bottomed sandals. He is not allowed to wear his glasses and he wears a wig to fake the traditional longer mane of the old wizarding sects. Basically, he looks simple but his simplicity belies a deeper arcane aura that is almost tangible.

    Most importantly, they allow him to have his magical supplies: chalks, incense, candles, herbs, certain other bits of previously living organisms, his wand, his staff, crystals of various sizes and colors, pentagrams, the brooms and buckets from the story, and most important of all for his character and for his magical instruction--the book of the sorcerer. Eventually, when it is his time to retire, he will take the place of the current sorcerer and another apprentice will be trained. So it is very important that he be trained in all of the magical arts.


y o u o u g h t t o k n o w


How I am
    Ephraim is very social and easy to be friends with. When someone talks to him seriously, he puts his entire attention on them. He's always silent in times like this and will not give away his emotions or thoughts until whoever is speaking no longer has anything to say. He is very supportive of his friends and accepts who they are without question. While he is a very good and loyal friend, once you know him, you'll realize that he is actually withdrawn. He is not very honest about his true self with others. He is afraid that if he makes deep connections with friends that they will hurt him like the death of his parents. Kari is the exception only because he has known her long enough to trust her but not even she knows every aspect of his being. He is deathly afraid of losing her or his grandmother.

    Besides that, Ephraim is realistically optimistic about most things. He prefers to see the positive side of any situation but cannot ignore the negative realities of them either. He tries to provide comedic relief whenever possible and loves laughing with his friends. His passions are tennis, violin, and writing poetry. He enjoys school and has always thrown himself into learning of any sort. He's also a little bit self-conscious about using his knowledge because he was teased for being a know-it-all as a child and would rather not display his intelligence openly. Ephraim is still a virgin although he has experimented since coming out to his friends and family as gay.

How I came to be
    Ephraim was born in London in June of 1993 but moved to the East Coast of the United States at a very young age. Aaron and Emily Venefice were his parents. Emily was a painter of some renown and Aaron. They were both loving, kind people who doted on their son. Unfortunately, Ephraim was never given the chance to truly get to know his parents. They died in a building collapse when he was four years old. Ephraim was forced to move to America to live with his only remaining family who would take him. Currently, Ephraim lives with his grandmother from his father's side. She is a small but fierce woman who places her entire being into whatever task she happens to be doing on any given day. She's just barely five feet tall with permed white hair atop a face as wise at it is wrinkled. Nana does not wear glasses unless she is reading and she still has a clear loud voice that is filled with life. Their house is small and a little run-down, but this fact only emphasizes the love and laughter that emanate from every window and door. It was truly a wonderful home.

    His love life, however, has been less than wonderful. Growing up, Ephraim made few friends because he was shy and his accent made him stick out in a world where you have to fit in. The only major friend that he made in those years was Kariana Moura. Kari was born in Hawaii and lived for most of her life in a military base in Germany before her father finally was stationed in the United States. She understood, more than anyone else, what it was like to move from another country and the two of them became fast friends. She inspired most of Ephraim's passions and encouraged him to take up writing and violin when he was uncertain of how others would view him. She has such a way with words; you have never heard an argument until you have listened to her debate. Her opinions are strong and vast (Ephraim believes this is to make up for her small size) and she always stands up for what she believes in. Ephraim tried dating his best friend Kari during their first year of high school. At first, he enjoyed all the extra time they spent together; he truly felt closer to her than anyone he had ever known. But, he realized after their first kiss that he did not like her that way. In fact, he did not like any women that way. A few weeks after that first kiss, he invited her over to watch a movie and was determined to tell her the truth, no matter how scared he was. While it was loading, he told her he needed to talk to her. “Kari,” he said, “there's something I need to tell you..” He looked down at his hands while he tried to find the words. Looking up, he saw the worry clouding her eyes and it gave him the determination. “I—I think I might be gay” he admitted at the same time she blurted out, “Do you think you might be gay?” There was an awkward silence before they both burst out laughing and they've been even closer as a result.

    His powers first showed themselves on his seventeenth birthday. He accidentally charmed his grandmother's entire broom closet which began to sweep, mop, vacuum, and wash everything in sight. In his panic he called nine one one and instead of the police (and more likely the psych ward), a representative from Ever After Academy arrived on his doorstop. He has no idea how they found out about the incident so quickly, but he was given the letter right there. The man also taught him how to dispel any accidental magic he did in the future and told him not to discuss his powers with anyone and that if he wanted to learn how to control them, he would have to go to EAA. Nana was unsure about sending him so far and to a school she had never heard of, but she believed him when he told her how certain he was that he wanted to attend.


s o m e o t h e r i n f o r m a t i o n


There's something else you ought to know
    He is an only child and he desperately wishes that he could have had brothers and sisters. One of his dreams is to have many children and a huge family to help fill the gap of the one he lost.

    He has never smoked or drank and does not plan on changing that in the future. Such activities have always seemed ludicrous to him.

    He is very emphatic and tears up when watching or listening to a movie or music with a sad theme.

    In general, he avoids conflict like the plague. He would much rather agree to disagree than actually fight with someone (physically or verbally). This is not because he is self-conscious about how others view him though.

    Generally, Ephraim ignores the drama and pettiness of his peers and could care even less how they view him. In his opinion, society can go **** itself. He will be his own person whether they like it or not.


.::Arthuritis592::.
((My hair is pretty much the same as Ephraim's but a little shorter. aka brown medium-ish length, layered, tousled))

Arthuritis592


Arthuritis592

PostPosted: Tue Dec 07, 2010 11:21 am


Holy crap that's way bigger than I expected. I figured it would be better to have too much than too little so let me know what I should cut. The 100 questions thing definitely helped me beef it up lmao
PostPosted: Tue Dec 07, 2010 11:27 am


LOVEING IT!

dragonhealer


Isa-sama

PostPosted: Tue Dec 07, 2010 1:52 pm


So just wondering, what kind of class schedule are we taking? Are we doing traditional 7 periods or are we on a block schedule?

As for the Ephraim, I wish he wasn't gay 'cause DAMN. Andy is hot but this guy is also quite cute. I like that we might have a gay person in the Academy though - spices things up a bit. I really like this character! Sadly I doubt he and Sierra would ever get to hang out...
PostPosted: Tue Dec 07, 2010 4:28 pm


Elliptic Sin, My critique
Ohhhh, I like him! Tall dark and handsome indeed. Now, as Shauna said, I would love to see more about him from his running away to getting to Ever After. Maybe you could say how he was asked to join the school, and things like that.

Also, in the extra, tattoos, piercings, embellishments, and scars all fit inside appearances. If you could please include them in his appearance description.

As all, depth wouldn’t kill, but I like him. Whenever you’re done, feel free to post. As far as I’m concerned, you’re accepted. I would like you to finish your profile before posting though.

Also, everything Shauna and Isa said I agree with 100%. Thank you guys soooooo much!

Chris, can you keep up w/ both Genius and Ever After. I mean, I’d love you in both, and you’re writing is up to par. Plus, I really think this RP will improve your writing even more. Nonetheless, I know you have a tight schedule, and this RP moves incredibly fast. I have problems keeping up myself. I mean, if you can handle the pace, I’d love to have you.

Now, onto your critique.

So, you make a gay character AFTER I decide Ayden is indeed, straight?! Seriously! You could have told me love, I mean, you were only like a day or so late.

Any who, who is Kari? You tell the story as if you assume we know her, and we don’t. Tell us how they met, why they are tight, and all that stuff. It shouldn’t be too hard, since you did the questions (I loveee that! But, want a secret? I have yet to finish it for any characters…) so, tell us the down low.

As I have said, go into depth. Sadly, you actually need more depth before I can fully give you the green flag, just add more about Kari and it’ll be good. Though, more details in all the other places would be pretty awesome.

Now, here’s my motto, when in doubt, don’t shorten it. What you can do is ask for critiques, and your readers will tell you if it needs to be shortened. The only times I’ve found it necessary to cut is when writing poetry for spoken word, when I’m writing a short story for school (and, just so you know, my short stories run an average of 8 pages or so), and things along that line. Never have I shortened anything for an RP (did you read the post where Mitsukai was held hostage in Genius, longgggg) All the best posts I’ve read were long, and brilliant. Now, if you’re reading it and you’re getting bored, then maybe it’s too long (as anidzuki says, quality before quantity) and taking some away might help. Though, from my experience, quality typically results in quantity. Just, when in doubt, ask us.

Isa, Hmm, I never really thought about it. How about a block schedule, 4 a day, so theres more time for drama.

Everyone, as you can tell by me calling shauna_marie shauna and Arthuritis592 Chris, I much prefer calling people by their name. So, if you’re all right w/ me calling you by your actual name, I’d be happy. Nicknames are fine too, I just don’t really like usernames.

ElaineeNicolee


Elliptic Sin

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PostPosted: Tue Dec 07, 2010 5:48 pm


Got it! I'm on the job and I'm on my way to do some serious Mods to my profile. I'm glad that I brought the subject of my character up here, it really helped to get the juices back flowing. Because my original idea of how Marcel's life went at this point...wasn't really..right.

Thanks, Shauna_Marie & Isa-sama, for helping me out. ^^

As for my name, call me Tay. Its not my full name but its what the fam., friends, and other call me so I have nothing against being called that here either. If any of you don't like nicknames, then just call me Octavia. I'm open to either. X3
PostPosted: Tue Dec 07, 2010 7:25 pm


I don't mind going by Isa. ^.^

Also wow. Uhhhh...does everyone want to fight now? At least all the males seem to want to.

Isa-sama


shauna_marie

Vicious Cutie-Pie

PostPosted: Tue Dec 07, 2010 7:29 pm


I know, right...and it seems to be all about Bianca....it's even stressing me out! I didn't expect her to be such a popular character with the males!

Oh, and no problem! I love to help! xp
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12 OOC: Chat, Discuss, and Advertise

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