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This story is only made possible by the sax player who used to sit next to me, who had the brain of a five-year-old.
At our band concerts, they hand out little yellow programs. Usually most of the band takes one to see what we're playing next, cause our band teachers never tell us. Said sax player, because he's a little kid, took the whole program and chewed it up, making it into a giant spitwad, then stuck in the bell of my sax while I was dealing with the bitchy clarinaet player in front of me.
You know how if you stick a round object in something you can blow in it floats? That's what happened. The first note I played was a fortissimo C# (Look ma, no hands!) and that program went right up in the air. I had to deal with that spitwad for 103 whole measures, because we didn't have a rest until then. It went down when I played piano, up when I played forte, but it never got off balance and fell down. It was really embarrasing because everybody in the first two rows could see there was something floating above my sax.

Oh, remembered another! One day when we were outside practicing after school, a guy drove by in his truck and his friend had his naked butt out the window and was mooning us! Eh..we're all scarred. He was really white and kinda chunky. xp

Gasp! The horror! Tee hee, that would be entertaining. There's a kid in my band who dropped a dime in his trumpet and had to buy a new one. Now we threaten him with dimes, and he's afraid. It's hilarious.

Our fight song is Eye of the Tiger, whom were you playing might I ask?????

At our Jazz concert tonight, a senior was doing his calculus homework, and left to go watch the band playing perform. My friend and I stole his calculator. It was a TI-83+, one of the ones you can write messages on...and we wrote something to the following

I love you, *name*
Youre a silly goose.

Genital Herpes

And some other stuff, but I forgot. Sad, seeing as it was only 3 or so hours ago. rolleyes But we were sitting in front of him, and he came back to sit down, and resumed his hw. My friend and I were snickering in our seats ahead of him, occasionally glancing back. He turned on his calculator and was like..."WTF??---Ohh....Jerks..." In a sarcastic tone...


priceless...

Oh yeah... On more. We went to the track team’s meet against the school’s biggest opponent. We really hate the track kids. Seriously. I don’t know why we went but we did. And the worst thing is we had to play “Go Big Blue” while the cheerleaders danced to it. Even worse our school is POOR and we had to share the bus with the stupid cheerleaders. So they took the back and we took the front, where we created a master plan.. IT turns out the faster you play, the faster they have to dance, the more pissed they get. See, everybody wins! So we get there and we have to make a huge trek across their track field in about 100 degree weather. We play our hearts out until its time for our collaboration with the cheerleaders. We played as fast as possible and all the track kids were laughing at them instead of us. The feeling was great. So we make the trek back and we are all dehydrated and tired. My friend who plays baritone was having difficulty lugging her instrument along and I felt bad only having a clarinet and all. So I stop to help her and next thing I know I am pushed down by a cheerleader. I got so pissed. The director and cheer coach were up ahead so they didn’t see but David who is this whup-your butt kind of guy sees and gets really pissed. Then he tells another sax who tells another who tells another who tells the anger management Zac mentioned above who gets PISSED. They start yelling at her and ganging up on her and then the other cheerleaders come and a huge fight ensues. HA! The cheer coach broke it up and we all got in trouble but we didn’t care. We went to our hour detention the next day wearing shirts that said “Cheerleaders Suck, Bandos Forever”. So we sat there in a row, facing the cheerleaders (because supposedly if we do nothing but stare at them for an hour we will have good will towards one another) wearing our shirts. It was pretty cool.

Im in color guard and we love to pull pranks on eachother and our advisors so i have a couple funny stories

1.) last year we went to FJM and we stayed the night well the veterans thought it would be funny to pull a prank on the rookies ((i was a rookey then)) well one night when we were having a team talk they snuck into our rooms and stole our bras xd then the last night we were there me and 3 other girls (( they were rookies too)) well we stayed up talking and at aroun 1:00 i saw footsteps multiple times in fromt of my door and we wern't supposed to be in the hall so i looked through the peephole and saw a line and i didn't think it was supposed to be there so i opened the door and saw all of our bras hanging everywhere and me and the other girls in my room thought it would be great if we added to it so we got some shaving cream and put it all over the bras he he he in the morning the veterins didn't know who did it he he he and later a long time after this whol incident happened i was talking to one of the girls and she said they hooked all the bras together and were jumproaping with them lol


2.) when we went on a trip to Ohio University the veterins bought a pair of granny panties at one of the places we stopped and they put them in a seat on a different bus and when we all got on the bus to leave we sow the dude who seat it was freak out

3.) we stuck a pad on girls back and her mom was unfortunatly a shaparone on that trip and she said that they would file harassment charges which to this day they never have he he he

4.) while we were still at FJM all the girls wwere on the first three floors and the guys were on the fourth floor well we took a wet tampon ((wet from water.. no one used it)) and we got in the elivator and threw it infront of their elevator entrance

5.) another funny story about the elevator there my whole color guard got in the elevator when we had breaks and there was twelve of us well we just had little elevator rides lol whoever wanted to ride it had to squish in he he he

6.) one day at band camp.. the advisors put marbles in our flagpoles and everyone complained about the noise lol

7.) this is the most recent and funniest story.. ok we were at a girls sweet 16 surprise party and we had done the phone pranking and we had smashed the pinjata ((another funny story about the pinjata after this one is over)) well we had done all that and we were bored and wanted to TP someones house so we decided to TP our advisors house because we could get inside and do more damage since her daughter was at the party and she had her house key and she knew her mom wouldn't be home well we fit 8 people in a small 5 person car there was a guy in the trunk the driver two people in the passanger seat and 3 people in the back and one person on the floor space behind the driver seat (( she is really skinny so she could fit there)) well we got to our advisors hous and two people went and TPed the back yard and the rest of us were in putting stuff where it wasn't supposed to be(ie stuff frome the freezer in the fridge and so on) well we got done and we drove back to the girls house and it just so happened that the winter drumline finals were happening the next day so we heard a drumline called Odessy practicing down the street so we went and listened to them for an hour meanwhile our advisor had called the girls house to tell her daughter what happened and she said she called the cops so i started freaking out and everyone else was like no she didn't call the cops and it turns out she didn't if she did and my mom found out i probably wouldn't have been let to go to another sleep over again and she said she was going to get us back and she hasn't yet

8.) ok my final story about the pinjata ok it was attached to a clothes line thing so we were moving it around while people were swinging at it lol and one girl was standing right under the line and we swung it and hit her in the head and my friend with one of those video phones was recording it and we watched it and every time we laughed so hard and she is going to try to send it to one of those funniest video shows

well i hope you got a laugh out of my stories ^.^

Once I become unlazy, I'll type all the stuff that happened the day before yesterday on our band trip to Cedar Point. Even though I'm really sick now it was SO worth it because John let me lay in his lap when he realized I was fevered on the way back.