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 Posted: Wed May 27, 2015 6:55 pm
He gave Otto a sideways glance. "Your weapon is ******** huge, I would imagine you'd need a lot of strength for that," said Chance with a laugh. "Pulling back a bowstring takes a lot of effort too, but after a while it just gets exhausting."
He gave a hum of thought. "You don't technically have to have a girlfriend or boyfriend to have sex," he said lightly. "Though obviously if that's how you prefer it, that's completely understandable. "
A pause, and then he added, more quietly, "The last time I let myself go, it was just with some guy at a bar. It wasn't pleasant, by any means."
He hadn't told anyone that, had not even considered it, because even with Chance's low standards, he'd felt this was not something to be shouted out from the rooftops. The mindset he'd had when he'd scoured the club for a potential candidate was not one he wanted again.
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Posted: Thu May 28, 2015 4:58 am
"It ain't so much that I prefer it that way. I just grew up thinkin' it was the only way." Only recently had he allowed himself such pleasures outside of a relationship; even if he tended to attach himself to those he did end up with. In Sasha's case, he'd thought he knew her well. He'd trusted her, and so.. "I prefer bein' with someone I know.. or someone I'm comfortable with. I'd be too anxious to do it with a stranger." As it turned out, Chance seemed to be able to do that just fine, even if his last romp ended poorly. "Sorry." He said out of sympathy more than anything. "Don't think I could ever do that. Just hookin' up randomly. But maybe you don't look at it as complicated as I do."
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Posted: Thu May 28, 2015 9:19 am
"You and many other people share that mindset," said Chance lightly, fingers moving restlessly across the desert floor, skimming over the dirt and the rocks with a soft rustling noise. "I grew up thinking that it was just something that people did to have fun. My mother went through men like most people went through socks, so I never really put much thought into having it actually be anything more than what it was."
And he still didn't, for the most part. But of all the people he'd slept with so far on the island, it seemed most of his partners weren't just random hookups, the way he'd used to have them. One nighters, yes, but they'd all been with people that he found himself to be comfortable with.
"Being with a stranger has its benefits," said Chance mildly, resting his head on his arm. There was a rock pressing against his side, and he shifted a little to dislodge it. "No drama, no hangups. But there's something a lot better about being with someone you're comfortable with, I've come to find out."
He turned his face into his arm and laughed, the sound muffled.
"This is not where I meant this conversation to go, I'm sorry."
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Posted: Thu May 28, 2015 1:24 pm
"Your mom sounds like a real winner.... no offence." He couldn't imagine how uncomfortable life would be for Chance. Otto's childhood had been odd enough, dealing with funerals every weekend. Or being tossed to his grandfather's house when his parents didn't have the time for him. "See, that's why I thought more like you on it. The no drama thing. But then I start worrying that I'd feel cheap. Which I guess is a dumb way to see it." Why did sex with a stranger have to be cheap anyway? Why did he have to see it as something intimate and spiritual? Was he just over sensitive? He gave Chance a sideways glance, shrugged, and looked back up at the sky. "I dunno. Ain't like you made it awkward."
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Posted: Thu May 28, 2015 1:30 pm
"Oh, she was certainly something," Chance murmured, idly drawing patterns in the dirt. The fire was making him feel pleasantly warm, though he was still restless, eyes still flickering up to the sky every few seconds. "Except for a mother, that is. She was everything but a mother, I suppose."
He turned his head to look at Otto, a little smile playing at the corners of his lips as he physically refrained from reaching out to play with his hair again.
"You're not technically wrong if you see it differently," said Chance. "It's just how you are. It's one of those things where some people see it one way, and others see it a different way. I'm starting to see things a little differently myself."
A hum escaped his throat. "But I'm also one of those people that, while I enjoy my solitude and quiet, also find sleeping at night better if I have someone with me, so I suppose there is that."
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Posted: Thu May 28, 2015 1:37 pm
"Oh ya? Drama and all?" He teased in deadpan, remembering the worry Chance had over the last friends he'd slept with. Otto himself simply felt shame over his own desires. Maybe that was why he tried to pretty it up with relationships to justify them. Drama was a price for a fun time. "I sleep like a log regardless." He replied bluntly. "But it's nice wakin' up with someone there now and then." Otto whined aloud, stretching his arms over his head and flopping them back down. "I just want healthy, no drama sex that doesn't make me feel like a piece of s**t later on."
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Posted: Thu May 28, 2015 1:43 pm
"Drama and all," Chance deadpanned right back. "But you know me, I don't actually sleep a lot, and I think maybe it's finally starting to wear on me." Like his "argument" with Finn that was more of an embarrassing lack of judgement than anything else. Thank heavens it had been worked out.
"I slept all right before I came to the island, maybe it's just an island thing...lately I can't seem to get to sleep before five or six."
Chance turned his head to look at Otto in the firelight, the quiet words on the tip of his tongue falling free before he had a chance to stop them.
"My door is always open."
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Posted: Thu May 28, 2015 1:55 pm
Otto's head turned to Chance, his face flushing hotter than the camp fire. Did he have a reason to turn him down? No. Did he want to turn him down? No. Was he scared of accepting? Yes. Because if he slept with a guy, he'd affirm the one night stand with a guy wasn't just a one time fling. It would affirm that he was in fact attracted to guys in a way he'd only reserved for women. It would solidify that he wasn't the definition of normal he clung so hard to. But on the other hand? He could be with a guy and actually remember most of it. He could go into it with a clear and deliberate mindset, and not just a drunken haze and a lack of inhibitions. He'd hated that his first time with a guy had been so sloppy, and half of it forgotten. It cheapened the moment, and it made him feel loose. He'd always thought himself to be more careful than that. But really, when sex was dangled over his head, it was always so tempting to take a bite. He turned away again, Chance's face making his heart rate go wild with anxious uncertainty. "Um.. I'll think about it." He murmured with a slight tremble.
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Posted: Thu May 28, 2015 2:10 pm
If it wasn't for the restless excitement still coursing through his veins, Chance might have had the willpower to not say anything at all; because so far, in spite of his usually relaxed personality when it came to this sort of thing, there was a line when it came to Otto, one that Chance had so far respected.
Except now the offer had been made, and he couldn't take it back. And he didn't really want to take it back, because it hadn't been a lie; the door was open to Otto, whose face was painted scarlet under the firelight.
"Just...just so you know," said Chance quietly, his voice a little hoarse. His gaze was still on the back of the other's head. "If ever you're interested, I mean. It's not me forcing you into anything, it's whatever you're comfortable with."
His eyes flickered halfway shut as he eased out a breath.
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Posted: Thu May 28, 2015 2:13 pm
"You can't really force me into anythin'." Otto responded back, waiting for the night air to cool off his skin. "If I don't want somethin' I'll be pretty obvious about it." Like a solid No, or a kick to the shin, or more likely a punch to the nose. Otto wasn't subtle about the things he didn't like. Dammit, now he was all jittery. No way he could settle down now.
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Posted: Thu May 28, 2015 2:15 pm
The fact that Otto hadn't outright said no was a little reassuring. Chance exhaled another breath, reaching out and very lightly touching Otto's shoulder in a gesture of reassurance. It was barely a touch at all, more a glancing brush of his fingertips.
"Sorry," he said softly. "I know that. That's part of why I like you."
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Posted: Thu May 28, 2015 2:17 pm
Otto felt a little brave again, and turned his head back to face Chance. He gave a small smirk. "Just a warning, when I'm scared I got for the nose."
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Posted: Thu May 28, 2015 2:20 pm
The smirk alleviated some of Chance's worries that he'd finally overstepped. Chance prodded Otto's forehead playfully.
"Thanks for the warning," he said dryly, and then he added teasingly, "Sure you can reach me?"
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Posted: Thu May 28, 2015 2:21 pm
Otto's mouth hung open. That little--- He huffed and flicked the man's forehead. "Nice one, a*****e. Can you see the Gods of Olympus from up there?"
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Posted: Thu May 28, 2015 2:23 pm
He was laughing now, unable to hide it.
"Maybe," said Chance loftily, swatting at Otto's hand. "I mean, really, it's kinda nice, being this tall, it means I can see over people's heads and all, and it totally means I have an advantage - "
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