|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 Posted: Mon Jun 10, 2013 9:15 am
Thinking about it makes me sad, that something with someone never really worked out. *Sigh* I would have liked it to, but distance is/was such a huge factor...among other things. And as sad as it makes me, I don't think it would have worked out regardless. There wasn't enough common ground/shared interests. Or at the very least the interests we did share were on two different levels. I feel like I'm partly to blame for not being as enthusiastic as they were.. I probably came off as aloof and disinterested... possibly uncaring. Could have also been my inability to express affection or other positive emotions/feelings. They're hard for me to express since I'm more proficient in expressing emotions on the negative spectrum (remorse, sorrow, guilt, anger, etc). Positive ones feel foreign and awkward to me. And often times I sound insincere when expressing them. People say they understand, but often time they feel offended or put off when I fail to react properly and for that I apologize. I'm sure this person was no exception either. I'm just incredibly useless when it comes to affection or emotions in general. It's caused me to lose a lot of friends over the years... I don't even know where I'm going with this anymore.
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Jun 12, 2013 11:47 am
Silent Sympathy Thinking about it makes me sad, that something with someone never really worked out. *Sigh* I would have liked it to, but distance is/was such a huge factor...among other things. And as sad as it makes me, I don't think it would have worked out regardless. There wasn't enough common ground/shared interests. Or at the very least the interests we did share were on two different levels. I feel like I'm partly to blame for not being as enthusiastic as they were.. I probably came off as aloof and disinterested... possibly uncaring. Could have also been my inability to express affection or other positive emotions/feelings. They're hard for me to express since I'm more proficient in expressing emotions on the negative spectrum (remorse, sorrow, guilt, anger, etc). Positive ones feel foreign and awkward to me. And often times I sound insincere when expressing them. People say they understand, but often time they feel offended or put off when I fail to react properly and for that I apologize. I'm sure this person was no exception either. I'm just incredibly useless when it comes to affection or emotions in general. It's caused me to lose a lot of friends over the years... I don't even know where I'm going with this anymore.
Although, for what it's worth, you don't come off as aloof or disinterested to me. On the contrary, you come off as a total sweetheart who just needs a little more self-confidence!
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Jun 12, 2013 8:22 pm
Foam-Dome Silent Sympathy Thinking about it makes me sad, that something with someone never really worked out. *Sigh* I would have liked it to, but distance is/was such a huge factor...among other things. And as sad as it makes me, I don't think it would have worked out regardless. There wasn't enough common ground/shared interests. Or at the very least the interests we did share were on two different levels. I feel like I'm partly to blame for not being as enthusiastic as they were.. I probably came off as aloof and disinterested... possibly uncaring. Could have also been my inability to express affection or other positive emotions/feelings. They're hard for me to express since I'm more proficient in expressing emotions on the negative spectrum (remorse, sorrow, guilt, anger, etc). Positive ones feel foreign and awkward to me. And often times I sound insincere when expressing them. People say they understand, but often time they feel offended or put off when I fail to react properly and for that I apologize. I'm sure this person was no exception either. I'm just incredibly useless when it comes to affection or emotions in general. It's caused me to lose a lot of friends over the years... I don't even know where I'm going with this anymore.
Although, for what it's worth, you don't come off as aloof or disinterested to me. On the contrary, you come off as a total sweetheart who just needs a little more self-confidence!
Really? I don't know... I guess it was just a feeling I had. It's physically draining for me exert too much energy for something like new consoles (as much as I loved watching the PS4 E3 conference), homestuck updates or anything in general that people are elated to see or experience. I have that one quick burst and then my usual constant lethargy comes back, which then leads me to write one worded replies (or at least one liners), I take a while to respond 'cause I go on auto-pilot with whatever else I'm doing. Part of the reason I stopped streaming. Just kind of draining both mentally and physically and the next day my mother would think I was upset or angry, when I was just tired. Sorry, I'm rambling. I guess I'm just extremely introverted. I don't talk to my co-workers at work unless they talk to me first. They probably think I don't like them, but I don't want to wast my energy on someone who could or could not care about what I have to say. And that's a 50/50 chance I can't take. If they approach me, then I feel it's okay to talk. Same goes for IMing people. I don't IM first. Rarely do I ever. And it's not because I'm pretentious or stuck up. It's just, I don't want that particular endeavor to end in failure. For example, a conversation that ends after a minute would probably keep me from talking to that person for a while, mostly out fear that the event would repeat itself and that that overwhelming feeling that I failed at social interaction will just eat away at me. Or someone who has no time or interest in talking to me. So, I don't that the chance. Ugh, rambling again. Please ignore this.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Jun 16, 2013 12:48 pm
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Jun 16, 2013 10:38 pm
Lol My secret: I used to like Blood Assassin 32
But he left gaia for a while and that b*****d guy left no way of contacting him.
I remembered him posting his secrets about his life and family in this thread... and was wondering if it might still be here.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Jun 17, 2013 9:26 pm
im scared to tell my mom that haha, im a boy
i dont know if shed freak out or something (´＿｀。)
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Jun 17, 2013 9:42 pm
izurukamukura im scared to tell my mom that haha, im a boy
i dont know if shed freak out or something (´＿｀。) shouldnt your mom know what you are a boy.. unless you are talking about your gaia mom?
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Jun 17, 2013 9:45 pm
yuchin4life izurukamukura im scared to tell my mom that haha, im a boy
i dont know if shed freak out or something (´＿｀。) shouldnt your mom know what you are a boy.. unless you are talking about your gaia mom?
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Jun 17, 2013 10:01 pm
izurukamukura yuchin4life izurukamukura im scared to tell my mom that haha, im a boy
i dont know if shed freak out or something (´＿｀。) shouldnt your mom know what you are a boy.. unless you are talking about your gaia mom?
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Jun 17, 2013 10:18 pm
yuchin4life izurukamukura yuchin4life izurukamukura im scared to tell my mom that haha, im a boy
i dont know if shed freak out or something (´＿｀。) shouldnt your mom know what you are a boy.. unless you are talking about your gaia mom?
im not ~*out*~ about it to anybody besides people online so i still have a female body physically but i am mentally male?? ; o ;
google it?? uuuh im sorry
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Jun 17, 2013 10:23 pm
izurukamukura yuchin4life izurukamukura yuchin4life izurukamukura im scared to tell my mom that haha, im a boy
i dont know if shed freak out or something (´＿｀。) shouldnt your mom know what you are a boy.. unless you are talking about your gaia mom?
im not ~*out*~ about it to anybody besides people online so i still have a female body physically but i am mentally male?? ; o ;
google it?? uuuh im sorry
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Jun 17, 2013 10:26 pm
yuchin4life izurukamukura yuchin4life izurukamukura yuchin4life izurukamukura im scared to tell my mom that haha, im a boy
i dont know if shed freak out or something (´＿｀。) shouldnt your mom know what you are a boy.. unless you are talking about your gaia mom?
im not ~*out*~ about it to anybody besides people online so i still have a female body physically but i am mentally male?? ; o ;
google it?? uuuh im sorry
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Jun 17, 2013 10:44 pm
izurukamukura yes, i am transgender and i would really like if people would use male pronouns when referring to me? hhhh im sorry for causing trouble..
so in the end it's not your fault.. according to google, it was a genetic thing. it's not troublesome, just something new i have never experienced. since it's a genetic thing, if you explain it to your mom, i hope she can understand that and it's rough what you are going through now..
according to google it happens in 1 out of every 13,000 births. it's not your fault, it's the doctor's fault and genetic's fault and the fault of nature...hopefully you can understand and seems like you did lot of research about this topic. depends on your mom, slowly.. let her know about it..
if a mother knows facts about it and in the current era we're leaving through, people are more knowledgeable about things like this that occurs.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Jun 17, 2013 11:00 pm
yuchin4life izurukamukura yes, i am transgender and i would really like if people would use male pronouns when referring to me? hhhh im sorry for causing trouble..
so in the end it's not your fault.. according to google, it was a genetic thing. it's not troublesome, just something new i have never experienced. since it's a genetic thing, if you explain it to your mom, i hope she can understand that and it's rough what you are going through now..
according to google it happens in 1 out of every 13,000 births. it's not your fault, it's the doctor's fault and genetic's fault and the fault of nature...hopefully you can understand and seems like you did lot of research about this topic. depends on your mom, slowly.. let her know about it..
if a mother knows facts about it and in the current era we're leaving through, people are more knowledgeable about things like this that occurs.
my mom is pretty accepting its just a weird thing to explain in general.. i bring up my trans friends sometimes (i know a few people just through online contact, and i know one girl irl idk) and she seems pretty accepting and open?? i mean shes okay with stuff i just feel like a really problematic child because a horrid depression, attempted suicide (3 times), and plenty of other mental problems is enough to deal with on its own guh, i feel bad that she even has to deal with me honestly
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Jun 17, 2013 11:13 pm
izurukamukura yuchin4life izurukamukura yes, i am transgender and i would really like if people would use male pronouns when referring to me? hhhh im sorry for causing trouble..
so in the end it's not your fault.. according to google, it was a genetic thing. it's not troublesome, just something new i have never experienced. since it's a genetic thing, if you explain it to your mom, i hope she can understand that and it's rough what you are going through now..
according to google it happens in 1 out of every 13,000 births. it's not your fault, it's the doctor's fault and genetic's fault and the fault of nature...hopefully you can understand and seems like you did lot of research about this topic. depends on your mom, slowly.. let her know about it..
if a mother knows facts about it and in the current era we're leaving through, people are more knowledgeable about things like this that occurs.
my mom is pretty accepting its just a weird thing to explain in general.. i bring up my trans friends sometimes (i know a few people just through online contact, and i know one girl irl idk) and she seems pretty accepting and open?? i mean shes okay with stuff i just feel like a really problematic child because a horrid depression, attempted suicide (3 times), and plenty of other mental problems is enough to deal with on its own guh, i feel bad that she even has to deal with me honestly
btw night.. going to sleep ttyl
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Reply
