Welcome to Gaia! ::

I haven't been feeling good about myself lately. I've gained the weight back that I lost last spring. I feel unimportant, like I don't really matter. My exboyfriend is back in town and has been spending time with my best friend. Him and I dated for 2-3 months a year ago. She told me that he doesn't remember my name. As much as I dont want it to, this bothers me. Its really not helping with my 'I feel like a piece of crap' attitude. I could write more, but its really not worth it.

Griffin's Rules
Rule #7
Never make the mistake of thinking that someone elses view of you alter your perspective of yourself. Only allow it to alter your perception of them.

Just wanted to say that I hate having a broken heart and then have stupid ******** ignorant people tell you that some girl wants to date your ex who tells you that they still love you and you love them so very very very much.

That, and I hate it when my mascara runs.

So I went to the mailbox today to get mail. In the mail I had some bills. No biggie, just the internet bill and credit card bill. So I open up the internet bill and write them a check for $29.95. Then I open up the credit bill. Now, in the past month inco had some expenses.

The begining of the month there was the whole thing I had to go through with getting my driver's licence. Here's the problem I ran into with trying to get a NY drivers licence. In order to get one, you need 6 points of I.D. I had 4, Illinois driver's licence and my S.S. card. The other points were things you could get "if" you had a NY driver's licence. So, I'm stuck in some twisted catch 22.

So I apply for a passport, but in order to get a passport in NY I need a NY drivers licence. So, by this logic I assume that with my Illinois licence, I would be able to get a passport in Illinois. So I drive to Illinois and go to the post office for a passport aplication. Here's the thing with getting the Illinois passport, my mail was being forwwarded to a NY address I was uneligable to apply for a passprt in Illinois.

So, I'm back in NY and I'm going through the points that I can use. Most of them need a NY licence to get, but I found one that didn't require one. So to make a long story short, I'm a registered member of the cheroke mohawk tribe. The membership card from that tribe was enough to get me the six points of I.D. needed to get my NY driver's licence.

So the cost of getting a drivers licence and plates was a little more than $100. Now there was still more that needed to be done. They gave me a sticker to put into my window. Inorder for this sticker to be valid for more than 10 days, I needed to get my car in for a NY state inspection.

It failed because the roters were rusted out. This cost me $380.83. Add in the rising prices of gas and everything else and the bill came to $611.34. Now, I'm not bitching about the bill, or any of the expensis, I'm bitching about the return envelope the credid card company sent me.

I opened my credit bill and attached to the back of the return envelope was a "Holiday Gift Certificate" for $174 dollars. At first I'm happy, I get some extra cash for me. Then I read some fine print, this certificate was not redeemable for cash, and was only able to be used on the merchandise that was sold by the credit card company.

Again, I figures that I could use that $174 for some cheap gifts for people I didn't like, but was obligated to get something for anyway. Upon closer inspection, I realised that all the merchandise was marked up exactly $174. So, as an example, a nose hair trimmer was being sold for $179, a flashlight was going for $184. So I decided to not buy anything, I wasn't in the market for a $184 flashlight, even if it did last for over 10,000 hours.

So, I wright those bastards a check for $611.34 and I put it into the envelope. Then I noticed something, I needed to afix postage. Being that I'm sending them a check for $611.34, I find it odd that I need to spent the $0.37 for postage. I understand the internet company not including postage since it was only $29.95, but when a bill is 611.34, why the hell would they not include postage. It's not a big loss on their part so why am I faced with the $0.37 burden?

I just want a friend that can be there for me right now...

Does that imply that he's lost interest in me, or that all he really needs right now is a close friend?

sad

But he seemed quite sincere when he said it...


Oh well. I guess I'll just have to find out on my own, because I found getting advice from other people on my situation always messes things up.

If you want to do something right, do it yourself. 3nodding

Truthfully, sincere or not, all you can do is be his friend.