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WatersMoon110
Crew

PostPosted: Tue Sep 18, 2007 11:06 am


divineseraph
[Y]ou get to decide this for another person, albeit preborn? That doesn't seem very fair.

Fair or not, at least the pregnant woman is involved in the pregnancy. Having the (Federal, State, or Local) Government decide for her seems more unfair. Having control of her body taken out of her hands (even with the best of intentions) seems unfair, as well.
PostPosted: Wed Sep 19, 2007 12:29 pm


divineseraph
So, death is better than a chance? And you get to decide this for another person, albeit preborn? That doesn't seem very fair.


When a fetus in the first trimester can tell me it wants to be put up for adoption instead of being aborted, then it'll get a say.

Until then, I'll make the decisions myself.

Tyshia2


Tyshia2

PostPosted: Wed Sep 19, 2007 12:33 pm


lymelady
Tyshia2
lymelady
If that's the case and there is an option besides adoption that you could find if you absolutely had to, then why couldn't you do the same if you were 18 weeks pregnant? 12 weeks pregnant?

Why can't other women take that option? Why is abortion necessary to avoid parenting when you abhor the adoption system if that is true?

Why does a human need to die to avoid both your parenting and the adoption system if you're so sure that when you have a newborn and suddenly can't care for it, you won't put him or her in the adoption system and at the same time won't have him or her killed (since parenting is not an option whatsoever in this scenario)?


I could search for another option after this child was born because, as harsh as this may sound to some, I wanted this child.

I wanted to take on all the responsibilities of parenthood, I wanted to deal with pregnancy and childbirth, I wanted to care for it. Because I can't now doesn't mean I suddenly won't want to either.

In the case of an unwanted pregnancy at 10 weeks or so, I don't want be pregnant, I don't want to care for the child after it's born, and putting it up for adoption is not an option. Abortion is all that I can see to do. Abortion makes me not pregnant, I don't have to care for it, and it won't be in the adoption system.

What do you mean by "Why can't other women take that option?" I don't believe I ever said anything about women always aborting instead of putting the child for adoption, if that's what you meant. If a woman is morally opposed to abortion and would prefer to put her child up for adoption, I'll completely support her. Personally though, I am far more morally opposed to adoption than abortion.
The people I'm talking about are women who have said to me (quite a number in fact) that they'd be willing to go through with pregnancy, but the adoption system is horrible and so they're morally opposed to it since they can't or don't want to be parents.

I'm sorry if this was offensive, I don't intend to be, but I can't tell sometimes. I hate the adoption system in the US. I'll rant if I get started.


Oh, you weren't offensive at all. Don't worry. Sorry if I was at any point.

The other option I would've worked to find would've been one in which I could keep the child, since I wanted to be its parent.

For women who are opposed to both adoption and abortion, and who also don't want to or can't care for a child.... I really don't know what other options there are for them. None come to mind. I don't even know if there is another option for them.

I guess there's always the chance someone they know or a relative would want the child and be willing to take the child, but if a woman doesn't have anyone.... That really is a problem.
PostPosted: Wed Sep 19, 2007 2:40 pm


Tyshia2
divineseraph
So, death is better than a chance? And you get to decide this for another person, albeit preborn? That doesn't seem very fair.


When a fetus in the first trimester can tell me it wants to be put up for adoption instead of being aborted, then it'll get a say.

Until then, I'll make the decisions myself.


I'm sorry but I just find it wrong to kill someone just because they have no say in the matter and did nothing wrong and both mom and baby are perfectly healthly.

And what about the father? He should has a say and a choose to keep it and care for it if wants too. People seem to forget all about the father and don't listen and care about how he thinks or feels about it.

rweghrheh


WatersMoon110
Crew

PostPosted: Wed Sep 19, 2007 2:54 pm


sachiko_sohma
And what about the father? He should has a say and a choice to keep it and care for it if wants too. People seem to forget all about the father and don't listen and care about how he thinks or feels about it.

I don't know, a lot of women say that their husbands/boyfriends/partners support their right to choose. Many get their input before going through anything. It isn't as though all men are Pro-Life (which, oddly enough, there are people on both "sides" of this issue who seem to assume they are). I know you didn't mean to, but I'm really sick of people implying that all men want to keep unintentional pregnancies, and all women want to abort them. There are Pro-Choice men and Pro-Life women too. *grrr*

I'm done ranting now. *grin*

But, someone needs to have final say when it comes to this matter, and since the unborn human is inside the woman, it makes sense to a lot of people that it would be her.

Personally, if I weren't married, and for some reason slept with a Pro-Life male, and became unintentionally pregnant, and he offered to raise the resulting child by himself, with a legally binding contract that I would not be contacted for child support, and to pay for all of the prenatal care, I would let him. I think that sentence just killed the English language, it was so long.

I think that couples should talk about what they would do if they became unintentionally pregnant, before they ever have sex. And I think they should talk before they decide what to do with an unintentional pregnancy. I don't think that the woman should just make a choice without consulting the man.

But I would worry about a law that made it mandatory for a woman to get the man's signature to get an abortion, because of abusive boyfriends/husbands. And, beyond that, I don't see any way to make sure that she talks to him first...
PostPosted: Wed Sep 19, 2007 3:04 pm


WatersMoon110
sachiko_sohma
And what about the father? He should has a say and a choice to keep it and care for it if wants too. People seem to forget all about the father and don't listen and care about how he thinks or feels about it.

I don't know, a lot of women say that their husbands/boyfriends/partners support their right to choose. Many get their input before going through anything. It isn't as though all men are Pro-Life (which, oddly enough, there are people on both "sides" of this issue who seem to assume they are). I know you didn't mean to, but I'm really sick of people implying that all men want to keep unintentional pregnancies, and all women want to abort them. There are Pro-Choice men and Pro-Life women too. *grrr*

I'm done ranting now. *grin*

But, someone needs to have final say when it comes to this matter, and since the unborn human is inside the woman, it makes sense to a lot of people that it would be her.

Personally, if I weren't married, and for some reason slept with a Pro-Life male, and became unintentionally pregnant, and he offered to raise the resulting child by himself, with a legally binding contract that I would not be contacted for child support, and to pay for all of the prenatal care, I would let him. I think that sentence just killed the English language, it was so long.

I think that couples should talk about what they would do if they became unintentionally pregnant, before they ever have sex. And I think they should talk before they decide what to do with an unintentional pregnancy. I don't think that the woman should just make a choice without consulting the man.

But I would worry about a law that made it mandatory for a woman to get the man's signature to get an abortion, because of abusive boyfriends/husbands. And, beyond that, I don't see any way to make sure that she talks to him first...


I'm not saying all men want the babies and all women abort (don't even know how you got that idea?), but I think many people don't concider how they feel about it, not all men agree with abortion and there are some that would be willing and maybe even want to care for the baby.

People focus too much about the mother/woman even though she isn't the only one involded. Basically neither the baby or the father have any rights.

Yes people should talk about it before hand but many people don't and that is a big problem.

rweghrheh


divineseraph

PostPosted: Wed Sep 19, 2007 3:28 pm


WatersMoon110
divineseraph
[Y]ou get to decide this for another person, albeit preborn? That doesn't seem very fair.

Fair or not, at least the pregnant woman is involved in the pregnancy. Having the (Federal, State, or Local) Government decide for her seems more unfair. Having control of her body taken out of her hands (even with the best of intentions) seems unfair, as well.


It is no more bossing people around than a murder law. It is not saying "You MUST abort" or "You MUST give up your child for adoption", it is taking away a scenario which kills the fetus.

In the same way, murder laws do infringe upon choice, but they also, and more importantly, make one option that harms another illegal.

And also, as for the fetus speaking, no, it cannot. However, it is in a condition in which it cannot speak or decide for itself. There are laws in certain states that say that if a person is unable to make a decision due to incapacitation, and has not signed a release for their death, they are to be assumed to have a will for life and are to be kept on life support. Although this is not the same, as the fetus is inside a woman, it still supports the idea that a lack of consent to death does not equal a right to be put to death.
PostPosted: Wed Sep 19, 2007 3:30 pm


sachiko_sohma
WatersMoon110
sachiko_sohma
And what about the father? He should has a say and a choice to keep it and care for it if wants too. People seem to forget all about the father and don't listen and care about how he thinks or feels about it.

I don't know, a lot of women say that their husbands/boyfriends/partners support their right to choose. Many get their input before going through anything. It isn't as though all men are Pro-Life (which, oddly enough, there are people on both "sides" of this issue who seem to assume they are). I know you didn't mean to, but I'm really sick of people implying that all men want to keep unintentional pregnancies, and all women want to abort them. There are Pro-Choice men and Pro-Life women too. *grrr*

I'm done ranting now. *grin*

But, someone needs to have final say when it comes to this matter, and since the unborn human is inside the woman, it makes sense to a lot of people that it would be her.

Personally, if I weren't married, and for some reason slept with a Pro-Life male, and became unintentionally pregnant, and he offered to raise the resulting child by himself, with a legally binding contract that I would not be contacted for child support, and to pay for all of the prenatal care, I would let him. I think that sentence just killed the English language, it was so long.

I think that couples should talk about what they would do if they became unintentionally pregnant, before they ever have sex. And I think they should talk before they decide what to do with an unintentional pregnancy. I don't think that the woman should just make a choice without consulting the man.

But I would worry about a law that made it mandatory for a woman to get the man's signature to get an abortion, because of abusive boyfriends/husbands. And, beyond that, I don't see any way to make sure that she talks to him first...


I'm not saying all men want the babies and all women abort (don't even know how you got that idea?), but I think many people don't concider how they feel about it, not all men agree with abortion and there are some that would be willing and maybe even want to care for the baby.

People focus too much about the mother/woman even though she isn't the only one involded. Basically neither the baby or the father have any rights.

Yes people should talk about it before hand but many people don't and that is a big problem.

I didn't say you did. But you somewhat implied that the man involved would always/usually want to keep the child, which reminded me of how often people debating this issue imply that male=Pro-Life and female=Pro-Choice, which sent me off on a tangent. I should try to label these tangents as such, but I don't always make that very clear (I'll blame it on having the flu *wink*). Sorry about that, I do know that you don't believe that all men are Pro-Life.

The problem with bring the man into the issue is that he really doesn't have any legal rights when it comes to abortion. He can't take over control of the woman's body, even with the best of intentions (to save the life of the unborn human). So, while many people agree that he should have a say, he can't have the final say. Though he can, if he knows about the pregnancy and wishes to keep and raise the resulting child, try to convince the woman not to abort (assuming she wants to - which the majority of pregnant women don't want to as far more pregnancies end in birth than in abortion, both in the US and worldwide). He just can't overrule her if she does choose to abort.

WatersMoon110
Crew


WatersMoon110
Crew

PostPosted: Wed Sep 19, 2007 3:34 pm


divineseraph
WatersMoon110
divineseraph
[Y]ou get to decide this for another person, albeit preborn? That doesn't seem very fair.

Fair or not, at least the pregnant woman is involved in the pregnancy. Having the (Federal, State, or Local) Government decide for her seems more unfair. Having control of her body taken out of her hands (even with the best of intentions) seems unfair, as well.


It is no more bossing people around than a murder law. It is not saying "You MUST abort" or "You MUST give up your child for adoption", it is taking away a scenario which kills the fetus.

In the same way, murder laws do infringe upon choice, but they also, and more importantly, make one option that harms another illegal.

But not murdering someone doesn't take away a person's right to control their own body. Unlike a murder victim, an unborn human is using a woman's body. Thus, making abortion illegal takes away her right to deny use of her body to the unborn human.

I'm not saying that it is "bossing people around". I am saying that it takes away human rights from pregnant women, without any alternative. It is the control over her body part that you seem to be ignoring. This has nothing to do with choice, and everything to do with the government taking over control of someone's body.
PostPosted: Wed Sep 19, 2007 3:46 pm


WatersMoon110
divineseraph
WatersMoon110
divineseraph
[Y]ou get to decide this for another person, albeit preborn? That doesn't seem very fair.

Fair or not, at least the pregnant woman is involved in the pregnancy. Having the (Federal, State, or Local) Government decide for her seems more unfair. Having control of her body taken out of her hands (even with the best of intentions) seems unfair, as well.


It is no more bossing people around than a murder law. It is not saying "You MUST abort" or "You MUST give up your child for adoption", it is taking away a scenario which kills the fetus.

In the same way, murder laws do infringe upon choice, but they also, and more importantly, make one option that harms another illegal.

But not murdering someone doesn't take away a person's right to control their own body. Unlike a murder victim, an unborn human is using a woman's body. Thus, making abortion illegal takes away her right to deny use of her body to the unborn human.

I'm not saying that it is "bossing people around". I am saying that it takes away human rights from pregnant women, without any alternative. It is the control over her body part that you seem to be ignoring. This has nothing to do with choice, and everything to do with the government taking over control of someone's body.


The problem with this argument is that the fetus is only using her body.
The fetus has it's own body and isn't in any part of her body which why I dislike the whole "right to control onces body" since the fetus doesn't have a right to control it's body.
They should either reword it or come up with a new argument.

rweghrheh


Tyshia2

PostPosted: Wed Sep 19, 2007 4:53 pm


sachiko_sohma
Tyshia2
divineseraph
So, death is better than a chance? And you get to decide this for another person, albeit preborn? That doesn't seem very fair.


When a fetus in the first trimester can tell me it wants to be put up for adoption instead of being aborted, then it'll get a say.

Until then, I'll make the decisions myself.


I'm sorry but I just find it wrong to kill someone just because they have no say in the matter and did nothing wrong and both mom and baby are perfectly healthly.

And what about the father? He should has a say and a choose to keep it and care for it if wants too. People seem to forget all about the father and don't listen and care about how he thinks or feels about it.


It's not even just that they don't have a say, they can't. They not only can't express it, they can't even begin to comprehend any of it, at all. How exactly is a being like that supposed to have a say?

As for the father, he's not the one about to carry the fetus in his body for nine months. When men can do that, they can keep the pregnancies their wife/girlfriend/hookup didn't want. Until then, he can no more force a woman to keep a pregnancy than I can force you to give up your organs because I want to use them.
PostPosted: Thu Sep 20, 2007 12:59 pm


sachiko_sohma
The problem with this argument is that the fetus is only using her body.
The fetus has it's own body and isn't in any part of her body which why I dislike the whole "right to control onces body" since the fetus doesn't have a right to control it's body.
They should either reword it or come up with a new argument.

Did you mean "isn't in any way a part of her body"? Because the unborn human is, obviously inside a part of the woman's body.

First off, unborn humans have no legal rights. If we want to get into ethics, I am will to discuss this (probably in another thread). But when it comes to laws, unborn humans simply do not have a right to bodily integrity.

Unborn humans are inside of pregnant women, they are (for most of the pregnancy) feeding off of her nutrients. As such, given the right to bodily integrity, pregnant women have the right to demand the immediate removal of the unborn human. Because an non-viable unborn human cannot survive outside of the uterus, this removal results in its death.

Even if the unborn human were granted the legal status of "person" and the legal rights that go along with that status, this would not protect them from abortion. The right to bodily integrity does not apply when one violates another's body, and pregnancy is a violation, even if it is an unconscious and unknowing one. It must be up to the woman if she allows this violation or not, because it is her body that is being used.

WatersMoon110
Crew


lymelady
Vice Captain

PostPosted: Thu Sep 20, 2007 3:16 pm


Tyshia2
sachiko_sohma
Tyshia2
divineseraph
So, death is better than a chance? And you get to decide this for another person, albeit preborn? That doesn't seem very fair.


When a fetus in the first trimester can tell me it wants to be put up for adoption instead of being aborted, then it'll get a say.

Until then, I'll make the decisions myself.


I'm sorry but I just find it wrong to kill someone just because they have no say in the matter and did nothing wrong and both mom and baby are perfectly healthly.

And what about the father? He should has a say and a choose to keep it and care for it if wants too. People seem to forget all about the father and don't listen and care about how he thinks or feels about it.


It's not even just that they don't have a say, they can't. They not only can't express it, they can't even begin to comprehend any of it, at all. Not only that, they're not aware of anything at all.

As for the father, he's not the one about to carry the fetus in his body for nine months. When men can do that, they can keep the pregnancies their wife/girlfriend/hookup didn't want. Until then, he can no more force a woman to keep a pregnancy than I can force you to give up your organs because I want to use them.
I understand what you're trying to say, but the same can be said of an infant. It can't conceptualize adoption or being killed. It's only a little more aware than a late second trimester fetus, and possibly feels less pain than an early third trimester fetus does. It will never, ever realize it was alive, let alone that it is about to die. An infant is alive, but no more aware than a lot of animals we slaughter for food.

As for men, I can understand wanting to think of their rights. If a woman gets pregnant, she has total control, she can have sex knowing that no matter what, she can control the situation. Men, on the other hand, have no control. They need to live with it, they need to pay child support if she keeps the baby, they need to watch their children die if their partners choose abortion, without being able to save their children. Men have an instinctive pull to protect their children, yes, even their unborn children. The ones who are torn up by their children dying to abortion not only have to live with that, they need to live with knowing that they're halfway responsible for the deaths in the first place, because they chose to have sex. It's especially hard on men when women say before sex, "I'd never have an abortion," and then change their minds. Men have killed themselves over this. It's okay in today's society to tell a man, "You should have thought of that before you had sex," but it's not the same for women. Men bear equal responsibility without equal control, in fact, without any control. It's completely unfair to men, and I'm glad I'm not a man today because I wouldn't risk it. I'd rather live my whole life without sex than risk the person I trust most turning around when she got pregnant and saying, "I know I said I wouldn't get an abortion, but I want one, and I want you to drive me to the clinic and pay for it, and hug me afterwards because it's going to be difficult for me." I wouldn't be able to live with it.

It's true that it's her body though. If abortion rights are based on bodily integrity, it's one more example of how life isn't fair, and men need to live with it. There is a way to control it in one way, though. Get rid of child support. Women can choose to not have a baby for financial reasons. Men obviously can't, but it is possible to get rid of their financial obligation. It won't happen, nor would I really want it to because that would lead to more abortions, but it does make things a little more equal.
PostPosted: Fri Sep 21, 2007 12:54 pm


lymelady
Tyshia2
sachiko_sohma
Tyshia2
divineseraph
So, death is better than a chance? And you get to decide this for another person, albeit preborn? That doesn't seem very fair.


When a fetus in the first trimester can tell me it wants to be put up for adoption instead of being aborted, then it'll get a say.

Until then, I'll make the decisions myself.


I'm sorry but I just find it wrong to kill someone just because they have no say in the matter and did nothing wrong and both mom and baby are perfectly healthly.

And what about the father? He should has a say and a choose to keep it and care for it if wants too. People seem to forget all about the father and don't listen and care about how he thinks or feels about it.


It's not even just that they don't have a say, they can't. They not only can't express it, they can't even begin to comprehend any of it, at all. Not only that, they're not aware of anything at all.

As for the father, he's not the one about to carry the fetus in his body for nine months. When men can do that, they can keep the pregnancies their wife/girlfriend/hookup didn't want. Until then, he can no more force a woman to keep a pregnancy than I can force you to give up your organs because I want to use them.
I understand what you're trying to say, but the same can be said of an infant. It can't conceptualize adoption or being killed. It's only a little more aware than a late second trimester fetus, and possibly feels less pain than an early third trimester fetus does. It will never, ever realize it was alive, let alone that it is about to die. An infant is alive, but no more aware than a lot of animals we slaughter for food.

As for men, I can understand wanting to think of their rights. If a woman gets pregnant, she has total control, she can have sex knowing that no matter what, she can control the situation. Men, on the other hand, have no control. They need to live with it, they need to pay child support if she keeps the baby, they need to watch their children die if their partners choose abortion, without being able to save their children. Men have an instinctive pull to protect their children, yes, even their unborn children. The ones who are torn up by their children dying to abortion not only have to live with that, they need to live with knowing that they're halfway responsible for the deaths in the first place, because they chose to have sex. It's especially hard on men when women say before sex, "I'd never have an abortion," and then change their minds. Men have killed themselves over this. It's okay in today's society to tell a man, "You should have thought of that before you had sex," but it's not the same for women. Men bear equal responsibility without equal control, in fact, without any control. It's completely unfair to men, and I'm glad I'm not a man today because I wouldn't risk it. I'd rather live my whole life without sex than risk the person I trust most turning around when she got pregnant and saying, "I know I said I wouldn't get an abortion, but I want one, and I want you to drive me to the clinic and pay for it, and hug me afterwards because it's going to be difficult for me." I wouldn't be able to live with it.

It's true that it's her body though. If abortion rights are based on bodily integrity, it's one more example of how life isn't fair, and men need to live with it. There is a way to control it in one way, though. Get rid of child support. Women can choose to not have a baby for financial reasons. Men obviously can't, but it is possible to get rid of their financial obligation. It won't happen, nor would I really want it to because that would lead to more abortions, but it does make things a little more equal.


It swings both ways. Women have been pressured into getting abortions when they really wanted the baby, or pressured into keeping it when they really didn't want to. It's a horrible shame that it happens for either sex, and the men probably get overlooked way too often. But it really does boil down to whose body the fetus uses. I do sympathize with fathers who have been torn up about their partners' abortion, and I think men should have a say during the decision making. But really, if the woman wants the abortion, I don't think the father should get to override her choice.

I don't think I necessarily agree that there should be no child support, but I'm in complete support of men who don't want to pay child support for a child they didn't want, and I think it should be easier for them to sign away their complete rights (including financial ones like child support) to the mother if she wants it and he doesn't. I think it's pretty cruel to call them heartless, deadbeat dads when they never wanted the pregnancy or the child.

Tyshia2


divineseraph

PostPosted: Fri Sep 21, 2007 3:50 pm


WatersMoon110
divineseraph
WatersMoon110
divineseraph
[Y]ou get to decide this for another person, albeit preborn? That doesn't seem very fair.

Fair or not, at least the pregnant woman is involved in the pregnancy. Having the (Federal, State, or Local) Government decide for her seems more unfair. Having control of her body taken out of her hands (even with the best of intentions) seems unfair, as well.


It is no more bossing people around than a murder law. It is not saying "You MUST abort" or "You MUST give up your child for adoption", it is taking away a scenario which kills the fetus.

In the same way, murder laws do infringe upon choice, but they also, and more importantly, make one option that harms another illegal.

But not murdering someone doesn't take away a person's right to control their own body. Unlike a murder victim, an unborn human is using a woman's body. Thus, making abortion illegal takes away her right to deny use of her body to the unborn human.

I'm not saying that it is "bossing people around". I am saying that it takes away human rights from pregnant women, without any alternative. It is the control over her body part that you seem to be ignoring. This has nothing to do with choice, and everything to do with the government taking over control of someone's body.


All laws take away some right in order to protect others.

In the case of murder, we take away the option to murder to protect other people. In the case of abortion, we wish to take away the option to abort to protect feti from being killed. And of course, as with murder, there are exceptions, Such as a life or death situation.
Reply
Pro-Life/Pro-Choice Discussion

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