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But making money off your marriage isn't half bad.

Look!

Lattu's got a come-back!

*Oregon pwns Hawaii dance*

No, you have it all wrong.

You see, Oregon has Portland.

Portland has nickle arcades, the Voodoo Donut, Lattu, and a number of other things that have 10/10 on the 1 to 10 sexiness scale.

Oregon also has Dan Balmer, Eugene, Trees, Desert, Ocean, and a funny thing sticking out of the top.

Arizona only has a ditch, a Freckle, and a Jing.

Hawaii only has tourists, a Sun, and volcanos.

The United States has all of these, but it also has Texas, capitalists, nukes, chemies, bios, Cheneys, Bushes, Rumsfelds, and a lot of other politicians, which is why the US don't pwn.

Psshhhh Arizona has:

Scorpions
Palm Trees
115-degree highs in April
No humidity
All different climates (up north, there's snow)
A town called "Bag Dad" (yes, I spelled that right)
The Grand Canyon (which, admittedly, isn't that grand)
1/4 of 4 Corners
1/2 of Hoover Dam
The Colorado River
Lake Havasu City
A dinner theater in said city
Valley girls
Jing
Freckle
Katy (who has a glomp-ability rate of 525,600 x 10^525,600)
Alexa
Michaela (who got hit on by a hobo once)
Meredith (who is the epitome of sexyness)
Lingjin (the only person I know who tried to scan her hamster, and who was on the terrorist watch list at the airport when she and the Science Bowl team went to San Antonio)
The painted desert
The worst football team EVER
Snowbirds (retired people who come to Arizona for the winter and NEVER know how to get on the freeway)
The phrase "It's a dry heat"
The Sonoran Desert (which I am sitting in right now)
Saguaros (which only grow in said desert, and nowhere else in the world, and are almost always disturbingly phallic in shape)
A cactus called a Teddy Bear Cactus
The Apache tribe
Words you non-Arizonans probably can't pronounce correctly (Cholla, Mogollon, and some other stuff)
Lake Havasu
The London Bridge, which isn't actually the London Bridge, but just a bridge from London
96th St., which is somehow eternally under construction
A State Fair that has the record-holding biggest Spam can
Jimmy Eat World (they're from hereabouts, y'all)
Arabs who think they're gangsta

And much, much more

Native American-named areas
MEH
Jackeh(whose voices tell her to roll)
New York City
RENT
Broadway
Those awesome NYC pretzels
Upstate
All those ranches
Jones Beach(a beach AND a concert place)
Crapload of music and movie atars who came from here
4 seasons
Lots of water
Long Island
Our own pronounciation of the words "orange" and "Boston"

Wimpehnessism!