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What improvements do you think we could use? :/
  A more defined plot
  Faster pace
  We're fine as we are <3
  There's something else we need.
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Your_Last_Wish_For_Death
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PostPosted: Fri May 21, 2010 6:48 am


Alex nodded. "Most likely. They probably killed Mr. G or his daughter." She said. She got up and looked around the banister. "He's not coming, and we need a better plan. Let's find the rest of us." She said.
PostPosted: Fri May 21, 2010 2:05 pm


Adam and Gwen rushed up by the others after hearing the shots. Gwen saw Aura's injuries and said, "Oh that is it! you can trap me in a mansion, but you can't shoot my friends!" She pulled out a wrench and charged down the stairs into the darkness.

Kurtsy
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separated by a scream

PostPosted: Fri May 21, 2010 2:45 pm


Alyssa cringed at the thought of Mr. G or Elisa, who was like a sister to her dead. "Don't say that Alex!" She said panicky. Might as well find out who... Alyssa asked Lee "Where is it?"
PostPosted: Fri May 21, 2010 3:27 pm


Or his son, Aura cringed mentally as she finished binding the last of her injuries. "Wait, Gwen!" She can't go down there alone...we need a plan!

Consistent Spontaneity
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Illuminate Shadows

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PostPosted: Fri May 21, 2010 4:14 pm


Name: Karin Copper
Occupation: Learning to be an interpreter and a spy
Age: 16
Relation to host: She worked under him for a while to earn money for going to college. Karin knew the host's daughter well.
Special skills (investigative/fighting): Investigation: As a spy, Karin can easily pick locks and figure things out provided she has enough clues.
Fighting: She's taken extensive training on different types of martial arts and is a pretty good shot with a dagger.
Appearance (image or description): User Image
Anything else? For some reason, she hates a particular room in the mansion.
PostPosted: Fri May 21, 2010 4:22 pm


And we're still not sure if the person I came into contact with was dead or not... Lee added in his head.

He turned to Alyssa. "The body? Far into the room... in the direction of the gunfire. That is, you'd probably run into it if you kept running straight through the door... if the gunners there haven't moved it yet." He paused. "We should probably go after Aura and Gwen."

At the sound of another gunshot, he was already running.

ePhyllis


Kurtsy
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PostPosted: Fri May 21, 2010 5:33 pm


Gwen rushed the darkness to the opposite side from the stairs. I know it's down here somewhere...He hands felt around on the brick wall and then she felt the plastic. Quickly she flicked the switch and a lamp in the far corner popped on, but only lit up a third of the room. The gun shot sounded and Gwen ducked for cover down into a crawling position. She hurried over and hid behind a giant case for wines.
PostPosted: Fri May 21, 2010 5:36 pm


Aura ducked down with Gwen. "Should we come back later? With a plan? What are you trying to do?" she murmured quietly, grabbing a knife in each hand.

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Kurtsy
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PostPosted: Fri May 21, 2010 6:12 pm


"I'm trying to get us out of here, but we have to get past who ever else is in here. I should have aid something up stairs when we were in the garage, but my uncle has an underground lot sort of thing here. There's one or two work vans in there that the staff uses when they do yard work.", Gwen whispered.
PostPosted: Fri May 21, 2010 6:33 pm


Alex sighed silently in her head and looked down the stairs. I should go after them. She thought, then slowly desended the stairs. There was a light switch on the left side of the room, if the power worked she could possiblely turn the lights on.

Your_Last_Wish_For_Death
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separated by a scream

PostPosted: Fri May 21, 2010 6:42 pm


A bullet hit Alyssa's arm as she stood, contemplating who the body may belonged to. She let out a small yell, but remembered about everyone else being in danger and decided to stay quiet. "I don't have time to find the body anymore." Alyssa whispered to herself panicky, and in pain. She followed the path Aura and Gwen had and stumbled upon them within minutes. "Anyone else hurt?"
PostPosted: Fri May 21, 2010 6:42 pm


Karin finally succeeded in opening a window where she could get in from the outside. She had been in the backyard when she heard the commotion going on inside the mansion, unwilling to land in the middle of a conversation and get into an awkward spot, Karin had decided to open a window on the first floor. The window was rusty and it took all of Karin's patience not to just smash it with a kick, unlike most guests she saw approaching in their fancy dresses and shoes, Karin had asked for permission not to come dressed up. Mr. Gilfax had understood her high dislike of the inability to move in a gown so Karin had came dressed in comfortable clothes. Dressy enough, but not ridiculous.

Illuminate Shadows

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Your_Last_Wish_For_Death
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PostPosted: Fri May 21, 2010 6:57 pm


Alex was in the basement enterance and slowly was moving to the left of the room.
PostPosted: Fri May 21, 2010 7:02 pm


can I plz have a summery?

Illuminate Shadows

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Your_Last_Wish_For_Death
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PostPosted: Fri May 21, 2010 7:08 pm


((don't ask me for one.))
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