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 Posted: Fri Nov 05, 2010 10:13 pm
Orchid! I don't think thats good for you~ Hallucinating the time, with a fever! Dx
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Posted: Fri Nov 05, 2010 10:15 pm
>.< im not hallucinating..
>.< but i am running a fever..
my normal temp is 95-96... 97+ i feel like im dieing..
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Posted: Fri Nov 05, 2010 10:45 pm
bah minty forgot her english project!! -checks powerschool- pleaseeee be there >.<
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Posted: Fri Nov 05, 2010 10:56 pm
YaY xD i needs help i havent went to sleep since thursday morning so i say i been up for 24hours now i think to tired to tell.
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Posted: Fri Nov 05, 2010 11:04 pm
Iwagakure's Shinobi come out at night~ xD
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Posted: Fri Nov 05, 2010 11:07 pm
Yeah like vampires not the twilight ones xD
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Posted: Fri Nov 05, 2010 11:08 pm
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Posted: Fri Nov 05, 2010 11:08 pm
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Posted: Fri Nov 05, 2010 11:16 pm
can you guys check my english short-story to see if it needs corrections??
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Posted: Fri Nov 05, 2010 11:20 pm
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Posted: Fri Nov 05, 2010 11:25 pm
Emma was born in Rome, Italy. Her parents died when she was 10 and Emma was taken in by her grandparents who drank and smoked a lot. She went to a boarding school when she was 15 and hated the uniforms. She cut her hair to an Emo style and put on heavy eyeliner all the time. She had a goal to make at least one friend. The school was called Butterfly Academy. The outfits were glittered and everyone wore butterfly wings and carried flowers. Emma was the only one who wore black and white glittered butterfly wings. She changed the glitter outfit into a silk outfit.
One day at Butterfly academy, Emma came in her classroom with piercings on her face, lips, ears, nose and eyebrow. The Teacher nearly fainted! “Get out! To the office Emma!!” The teacher yelled. All the other girls laughed and the boy too. She turned and walked out. The school taught both boys and girls to be ‘proper’, Though, it was impossible cause Emma wanted to be just herself and not a proper young lady. Walking into the office the head master of the school just glared and glared for minutes. “Emma I’m disappointed in you. First changing the outfit against school rules then these…these pins in your face!!” He growled, wondering what punishment Emma should get. “They are not pins Mr. Cookoo.” She crossed her arms, that glitter itched her so she had to change it to silk or she could be itching to die. “It’s not Mr. Cookoo it’s Mr. Chukoo!” He got up then walked to the window to look out at the school’s courtyard. “Emma I know you have no friends or dorm mate here…but now you will. There is a new student coming here, she is a twin so you will have a male one too.” Emma was silent, she hated being social cause no one accepted her mind and ways. “What is their names?”, she asked. Mr. Chukoo turned around to face her. “Julia and Suki.” She got confused. “I thought one was suppose to be a boy.” The head master shook his head in aggatation. “Suki is a boy.” The bell rang. “Get your dorm ready for two new people.” I got up and walked out, heading to my dorm across the courtyard. It was dorm #66E, I love the number six and E cause it is the first letter of my name. My dorm was big. Three beds covered in junk., three closets, of which two were empty and one bathroom/shower. She began to clear off the bed near the bathroom, taking two boxes off it then stuffing them under her clean bed. Taking dirty clothes and throwing them into the hamper.
[note] i forgot to update the new version o_-
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Posted: Fri Nov 05, 2010 11:31 pm
Eh? Then... Updated the new version!
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Posted: Fri Nov 05, 2010 11:33 pm
can't it's on the school's computer cause it was being a b*tch and woudnl't save it!
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Posted: Sat Nov 06, 2010 3:54 am
little mintchan Emma, a (insert word here), was born in Rome, Italy. Both of her parents died when she was around 10 years old; Emma was taken in by her grandparents , who drank , smoked , and didn't really spend much time with her. She was sent to a boarding school when she was about 15 years of age and she really hated the uniforms that they made the students wear. She began to be entimidated by other students, so she cut her hair to make herself clasified as an Emo and put on heavy eyeliner all the time. She had only one goal and this goal was to atleast make one friend out of the entire boarding school that she attended. The school was called Butterfly Academy. The outfits were glittered and everyone wore butterfly wings and carried flowers. Emma was the only one who wore black and white glittered butterfly wings. She changed the glitter outfit into a silk outfit. One day at Butterfly academy, Emma came in her classroom with piercings on her face, lips, ears, nose and eyebrow. The Teacher nearly fainted! “Get out! To the office Emma!!” The teacher yelled. All the other girls laughed and the boy too. She turned and walked out. The school taught both boys and girls to be ‘proper’, Though, it was impossible cause Emma wanted to be just herself and not a proper young lady. Walking into the office the head master of the school just glared and glared for minutes. “Emma I’m disappointed in you. First changing the outfit against school rules then these…these pins in your face!!” He growled, wondering what punishment Emma should get. “They are not pins Mr. Cookoo.” She crossed her arms, that glitter itched her so she had to change it to silk or she could be itching to die. “It’s not Mr. Cookoo it’s Mr. Chukoo!” He got up then walked to the window to look out at the school’s courtyard. “Emma I know you have no friends or dorm mate here…but now you will. There is a new student coming here, she is a twin so you will have a male one too.” Emma was silent, she hated being social cause no one accepted her mind and ways. “What is their names?”, she asked. Mr. Chukoo turned around to face her. “Julia and Suki.” She got confused. “I thought one was suppose to be a boy.” The head master shook his head in aggatation. “Suki is a boy.” The bell rang. “Get your dorm ready for two new people.” I got up and walked out, heading to my dorm across the courtyard. It was dorm #66E, I love the number six and E cause it is the first letter of my name. My dorm was big. Three beds covered in junk., three closets, of which two were empty and one bathroom/shower. She began to clear off the bed near the bathroom, taking two boxes off it then stuffing them under her clean bed. Taking dirty clothes and throwing them into the hamper. [note] i forgot to update the new version o_- Ehh, got tired of editting, but you get the point, razz I re-read the beginning and then read the entire story it seemed nice, but could use a little more detail, seeing that it was your work, I could only give you examples of some better writting, so if you could make these corrections and make some more through out the paragraph, you should be fine. She began to be entimidated by other students, so she cut her hair to make herself clasified as an Emo and put on heavy eyeliner all the time. (This was only an example, seeing that that is probally not why she did it, but still teachers like reasons... idk why...) If you keep re-reading it, you will keep finding places to add more description, the more description the better. I did a paper one time for 100 pts; it was 6 pages long and I got an extra 20 bonus pts, so depending on how much effort you put into the description, will 'entice' the reader to continue reading, if you notice that in most papers, that the teachers marks are mainly on the first few sentences? That's because they where to 'Bored' to read the rest, so they scanned over it to make your grade worse. :/
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Posted: Sat Nov 06, 2010 10:58 am
it's suppose to be a short story and we use what we learned, we haven't learned much expect to do these[, . ! ? / " ' -] in our sentences
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