|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 Posted: Tue Nov 16, 2004 6:47 pm
Reciting dour poetry was probably not the recommended solution for a depressed spirit. But in a strange way, repeating the prose that she and Chae had read together seemed to make her guardian feel closer to her. So in a way it was therapy...in another it was pandering to the diesease.
Hearing her name cut through her thoughts made her break off from her wanderings, straightening up unconsciously as she looked around.
She hadn't even heard him.
Where she had expectedto see a child...she instead saw a young man. With dismay she realized that another relationship had just become a question mark. Now that he may...know.
She had not realized that the shade of the tree had hidden her,and as she stood, she mentally cleared her throat.
*I'm here.* she greeted softly. *You are looking very well.*
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Nov 16, 2004 7:01 pm
Nika's eyes crinkled in a smile as Shiva stepped out from the shade.
'Hey,' he walked over to her, running a hand through his blond hair, 'I'm as fine as ever... Was that you reciting that poem?'
He paused looking towards the tree they'd climbed together. How long had it been? It couldn't have been more than a few days... but so much had happened.
He looked back at her...
'...Beautiful,' his cheeks colored a bit, hidden behind his mask. He hastily added, 'The poem I mean.'
What was wrong with him? Why was he so... nervous?
...And now 'tis doomed to know the worst...
Perhaps that phrase had a larger effect on him then he'd thought. Perhaps not...
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Nov 16, 2004 7:12 pm
Kataio listened as she went up the stairs and quickly found the room that Aricin was in. She leaned on the door frame and watched him work for a moment. Kata smirked a bit and then started to move away from the room, the floor boards squeeking a bit as she left. All the time she hoped to herself that she didn't bother his work.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Nov 16, 2004 7:13 pm
She nodded softly. *The author is named Lord Byron. He was an earth poet that Chae is rather fond of. I was just...thinking aloud through it, I guess. I didn't mean for it to be overheard. Im sorry if it disturbed you....*
Her tone was rather stilted and awkward in a way that was difficult to overcome. It was as if she suddenly felt gangly and inelegant. Or even caught in some sort of wrong doing.
How much did he remember now?
*It's an intimidating poem.* she concluded, trying to shift attention. *A lament.*
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Nov 16, 2004 7:27 pm
Nika shook his head and leaned back against the tree, sliding down it until he sat on the grass.
'It didn't disturb me at all. It just sort of fit perfectly with what I was thinking, or more correctly, remembering.'
He closed his eyes and visibly relaxed.
'Intimidating yes but beautiful all the same.'
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Nov 16, 2004 7:31 pm
It was unexpected that he was staying. Had she expected that? She must have somehow. Oh why couldn't it be so easy as to just climb a tree and forget?
*Did you-I mean, should I leave you to your thoughts then?*
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Nov 16, 2004 7:43 pm
Nika slowly opened his eyes and tilted his head, looking up at her. Did he want to be left alone to his thoughts? No... not really... and now that he thought of it, hadn't she been there first?
If anybody was going to be leaving it would be him. Sitting where he was, though, was so comfortable... He wasn't going anywhere too quickly and it would be unbeleiavly rude to make her go so, he figured that they'd both have to stay.
'No,' he said simply and motioned towards the ground beside him, 'Sit with me?'
It was a request, not an order.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Nov 16, 2004 7:56 pm
*O-okay.* Sitting down a bit apart, she looped her arms around her knees and rocked a bit. Observing him from the corner of her eye as he reclined there so easily...almost carelessly, she felt...odd somehow. Like watching a photgraph or illustration. Maybe something she had seen in a book of some sort.
Accidentally?
To have sunk so low after a high such as growing had given her was a difficult thing indeed. Everything felt so off-kilter and wrong all of a sudden. Like a record skipping, leaving a horrible noise and confused words belting out a directionless repetition. One that was not intended.
Did he expect her to talk? Or say nothing? She was horrible at being on the spot and socially adept. That was a job for others...
*How do you feel?* She finally tried.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Nov 16, 2004 8:12 pm
Nika studied Shiva as she rocked. She seemed... upset? He sighed and leaned back against the tree, letting his eyes flutter closed again. It felt so good to just sit and relax. If he wanted to, he could think about his memories later. At that moment though, he didn't think about anything. It was comforting, in a way.
When she spoke he opened an eye and looked right at her, watching her closely. She didn't seem to be very comfortable. He frowned. What could he do to make her relax?
'At the moment?' he paused, his memories flickering through his head.
Not now. Later. He was too relaxed to try and work his memories out again.
'I'm fine...' Nika studied her. She didn't seem fine.
'What's on your mind?'
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Nov 16, 2004 8:25 pm
She stopped rocking, hands fluttering frow around her knees only to resettle after a moment of supreme concentration.
About to pass it off as something inconsequential, she instead lowered her head.
*Was Gee happy to see you when she saw you grew up?* she asked.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Nov 16, 2004 8:31 pm
Nika turned to face her. Was Gee happy when she saw that he'd grown? She seemed perfectly fine with it...
His chosen wasn't the type of person to get really upset about change. He gently tapped his foot against the ground in concentration. Gee seemed to accept things as they were.
He shrugged, 'She was a bit surprised, I think... and I don't think she was happy... but she wasn't sad either. Why do you ask?'
((I've got to go. Seeya.))
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Nov 16, 2004 11:15 pm
Shi looked at her fingers for a few moments, right hand rubbing the extra finger that lay there absently.
*I...remember.* She began softly *Lights. Bright lights...almost lurid. And sounds and smells. Beautiful music and laughter and toasts and banter...it's like...celebratory noise to me...no words but the tone of it all rubs up against me. I know it's some sort of social event...dancing and singing...*
Shiva paused in her narration, glancing up briefly as if to judge the emotional weather there before continuing in a stilted voice. *I could feel the people around me. More than I could count. Dressed up, feeling joyful and beautiful...I could feel it...and see it. And all *I* felt...was empty. Alone. Like I was the only person there in that crowd of smiles and laugher. Like I wasn't real.*
Swallowing, she began rocking again. *When I grew...I was so...happy. I felt like if I still didn't know who I was...I at least was close to knowing WHAT I was. I felt like I belonged in my skin. I felt almost comfortable. I never stopped to think what I was leaving behind. I didn't wonder if what I had was better than what I have. But...I'm afraid that it WAS better before...I'm afraid I lost it now.*
Her voice became tiny. *I still think I know what I was, Nika. But what I think I was....was lonely all the time.*
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Nov 17, 2004 2:15 pm
Nika listened quietly as Shiva spoke, his eyes filled with worry.
There had been lots of lights, yes and pople... but he hadn't felt lonely in all of it. Actually... Nika figured he had probably never been lonely. Not while he had had is beautiful girls. His daughters.
Not sure what else to do, he reached out and wrapped his arms around Shiva in a hug.
'You aren't alone anymore... You have Chae, the others...' he paused, 'and me.'
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Nov 17, 2004 6:18 pm
Kataio F Kataio listened as she went up the stairs and quickly found the room that Aricin was in. She leaned on the door frame and watched him work for a moment. Kata smirked a bit and then started to move away from the room, the floor boards squeeking a bit as she left. All the time she hoped to herself that she didn't bother his work. Aricin feels the eyes in the back of his head, turning as the floorboards creek... "Hello Kata.. Did I take one of your rooms?" He smiles.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Nov 17, 2004 7:58 pm
Shi stiffened immediately, choking back on the sudden need to begin wailing and degrading herself even more.
She had little right to be acting this way. She knew enough now to realize that. She had worked too hard now to undo it by acting like this.
*I'm sorry.* She said miserably. But the mention of Chae had completely pushed her over the edge of propriety. Breaking down completely, she started to cry. *I don't think Chae wants me anymore. She needed to take care of a child...but now I can take care of myself. Why does she need to take an interest now?*
Shaking, she finished *Everything that should have changed, hasn't! Everything that should have stayed didn't. Why did this happen? What did we do?*
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Reply
