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 Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2007 1:38 am
I walk it out the bank...with a lot of zeros, that's what my teachers call me,
predictions like they Cleo
I do my dance for em, they make 'bout 40,000
I do that in a month, I'm on resorts and islands
*ahem* next weekend will be something else random...hope you guys catch on.
on the painful road to November...
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Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2007 8:56 am
whee
A friend of mine says that ONE part of the song at least once a day...everyday. >>
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Posted: Thu Mar 01, 2007 1:18 pm
(wrist) EMO DISCLAIMER! IF YOU DON'T LIKE, DON'T READ! (/wrist)
and when you ******** up royally...
and when you make your mistakes...
when you lose that which you wanted...
and when you have to give up and back away...
keep reminding yourself, that this is why you're still alive.
Not to turn on the emo switch...but really...
I wake up every day sore, bitched at, and a slave to somebody...whether I love them or not. I keep thinking, "today I'll do it right" or "today I'm going to make a difference". Yet I consistently fall short of that goal.
What am I alive for? Am I making anyone happy? Maybe I WAS..maybe I USED TO...but what the hell is my problem now? I could've been with God, but He said my mission's not over. So here I am, making the same stupid mistakes..hurting myself and other people like a twisted addiction. When does it end? When do I finally fulfill the promises of love, and when are they fulfilled to me? emo
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Posted: Fri Apr 20, 2007 8:13 am
*In the distance, a cloud of dust is seen. As it moves closer and closer, a loud call is heard. A "whoop"ing and "yee-ha"ing. Finally... Backflip is seen. He wears a 72-gallon hat, a leather vest, goth-skin boots and a bright shiny star with an LED text bar on it that says odd sayings from history's greatest minds, like Scott Adams "If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask? Do they get smart just in time to ask questions?"
With Wonder Woman's Golden Lasso of Truth in hand, Backflip rides into the Chatterbox atop a light red butterfly named "Pierre." Note that the butterfly is light red... not pink. Totally straight.
With a flip of his mighty wrist (strong from video games, ya perverts) Backflip lassos the be-emoed chatterbox and pulls it back from the edge of the cliffs where so many a poor sheep have been driven off.*
"I reckon that oughta do 'er."
*Loud old west music plays with plenty of the unmistakably, but in describable Old West Movie theme song whistle sounds.*
"Yah!!"
*Flip rides off into the setting sun as the music dies down*
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Eloquent Conversationalist
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Posted: Fri Apr 20, 2007 8:24 am
(here is a chain letter i sent out to a friend last year..I have NO idea who sent it to ME,but i thought it was funny as HELL. seeing as it just made it back to me..and I thought I would share it with the family)
If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.
(Hardly seems worth it.)
If you broke wind consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.
(Now that's more like it!)
The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.
(O.M.G.!)
A pig's orgasm lasts 30 minutes.
(In my next life, I want to be a pig.)
A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death. (Creepy.)
(I'm still not over the pig.)
Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour
(Don't try this at home, maybe at work)
The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off.
(Honey, I'm home. What the...?!)
The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human jumping the length of a football field.
(Pig! Can you imagine?)
The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds.
(What could be so tasty on the bottom of a pond?)
Some lions mate over 50 times a day.
(I still want to be a pig in my next life...quality over quantity)
(But, how about a lionhearted pig?)
Butterflies taste with their feet.
(Something I always wanted to know.)
The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.
(Hmmmmmm......yeah...)
Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people.
(If you're ambidextrous, do you split the difference?)
Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump.
(Okay, so that would be a good thing)
A cat's urine glows under a black light.
(I wonder who was paid to figure that out?)
An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
(I know some people like that.)
Starfish have no brains
(I know some people like that too.)
Polar bears are left-handed.
(If they switch, they'll live a lot longer)
Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure. (What about that pig??)
Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread these crazy facts and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to, maybe even a chuckle.
(and so I have...bwa-hahaha)
In other words, send it to everyone !
(and God love that pig!)
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Posted: Fri Apr 20, 2007 12:21 pm
Ammusing news for the day
Police subdue naked woman wielding sword
Friday, April 20, 2007
A naked woman wielding a 3-foot-long sword was taken to a hospital Wednesday after an encounter with police at her home.
North Charleston police went to the woman's Old Park Road residence about 2:40 p.m. after the woman's doctor reported that his patient had threatened to kill herself, according to a police report. The woman came to the door nude, spit on the glass window pane, hissed at officers and pointed a large dagger at her chest, the report says.
Negotiators talked the woman out of the house, and she exited with a long, medieval-type sword, the report says. Police used a Taser to subdue the woman, and she was taken to a hospital for a mental evaluation, according to the report.
The home was condemned after police found dog feces throughout, the report says. It says animal control officers removed 10 dogs and a bird.
((I will point out the relevent points here... Naked... sword... Odd though... most crazy people have cats))
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Posted: Sat Apr 21, 2007 9:14 am
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Posted: Sat Apr 21, 2007 3:19 pm
That's not hair. That's a good method of killing your husband while having sex and making it look like an accident.
"He let out a moan and I bent forward and, and and...the hair, oh god the hair!!"
I bet she's let go the next damn day...
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Posted: Sat Apr 21, 2007 6:32 pm
ummm..Dak?..are we talking hair from the same area of the body? or did you go south on me?
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Posted: Tue Apr 24, 2007 5:14 am
-looks at the picture and chuckles-
Once upon a time, MY hair (above the eyebrows, Tess, above the eyebrows) was long enough that I could sit on it....... now, it's short, very short...... mrgreen
(by the way, did you know that when they say your hair will fall out after chemo, they mean ALL of it.... head, eyebrows, eyelashes, the southern forest....)
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Posted: Tue Apr 24, 2007 8:14 am
I don't like hair THAT long...grief.
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Posted: Tue Apr 24, 2007 6:09 pm
*cracks up*...oh God Brat...southern forest..
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Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2007 8:51 pm
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Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2007 10:16 pm
hahahahahaha poor japanese paris hiltons
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Posted: Fri Apr 27, 2007 9:40 am
*shakes head*
Must have thought they were getting vegetarian pooches
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