Welcome to Gaia! ::

"Ready," Lore murmrued.

He took her hand with a small nod. It was perhaps, a bit of a pity that they had to go, but it could not be helped at all.

Elnara linked arms with Lore as she started to lead the way back to the castle.

"That was quite a nice day," she smiled up at Lore, putting her head against his shoulder. "Don't you think?"

From Elnara's other shoulder, Idhril giggled. "That was lots of fun! Great-grandmother is fun, Mama! Me and Silver dear played on the swings and had lots of fun!"

Elnara smiled in agreement.

"I almost dread going back and facing Ruel again," she murmured. "I know now that he's the only one at the castle like that ... but still."

Elnara squeezed back, but she couldn't quite bring herself to smile.

"I don't think it would be so hard of not for the fact that he's my brother," she replied softly. "He and I ... we share the same blood. It could just as easily be him who had the ability ... I don't know if he realizes this or not, or if it would change his opinion ..."

She laughed softly, though there was no mirth in it. "It almost seems as though he met Lúthien too early," she sighed. "Perhaps if he had known about me before they met, she could have changed him just like Haradhel changed Elrohir."

She still didn't know if she could believe how that had happened.

Elnara nodded reluctantly. "I'm half-tempted to try to talk to him, away from everyone else," she murmured, "just to see ... if it would be possible ... but I just don't know if it would be worth it, really ... I'm almost positive that it can't end well, and if it were just me then it wouldn't be so bad, but Celebor can read my moods better than he can read his own, and it always affects him so strongly ..."

Elnara nodded. "And I don't want him to get hurt over something that he can't understand. I don't know if Ruel would actually hurt him or not ... but I couldn't bear if something happened to Celebor ... or any of the children."

She smiled faintly. "Perhaps I should be satisfied with the fact that I know that the rest of the family doesn't look down on me anymore, that they're even willing to stand up for me in the face of his absurdity."

Elnara thought about it for a moment, but all she could think of to say in reply was, "And yet he is the one who belongs here, and not I."

She looked up at him seriously. "Don't get me wrong, I don't mind not belonging here anymore ... I'm grateful for it, in fact. With you and the children, I have more than I think I would ever have had here, even if I had never been found out, if I had never returned to Gaia. But when it comes down to it ... I'm still the odd one out."

Elnara lowered her eyes. It was a fair question - beyond that, it was a good question. One she really had to think about.

Would she indeed want Celebor to be educated here, with someone who she knew would do his best to turn her son against her? It was true that there were many others here who would not allow Ruel to poison his mind, but still ... the general attitude ...

Yet where in Gaia could he receive the education she wanted him to have? She wanted him to know about her people, her culture, her ways, and she was fairly certain that there were no places in Gaia - or very few, at the least - that could offer that. And he was so young ...

"Not now," she replied finally, shaking her head slowly. "Not while he's still a child. Perhaps when he's older ... I don't doubt that the others would take good care of him, and I suspect that Ruel would try to avoid him ... but I don't want to leave him in a place like this, where he knows the general attitude towards me ... I don't think ... I don't think he would change at all ... I don't believe that he would allow Ruel to poison his mind ... but ... the thought of leaving him here, where there is so small a sense of family ..."

She shook her head again. "No. I can't. I couldn't bear to have anyone spend time where there's no sense of family, of unconditional love. Perhaps when he's older, but not now."