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Emerwyn

PostPosted: Sun Mar 05, 2006 9:59 pm


Emerwyn didn't look back up again. She couldn't meet another's eyes right now.
"Oh, but I did; and now I have lost them both... I have a question for you, Emelyn." Her eyes moved slowly up, dragging as though held down by weights.
"Have you ever tried so hard to help someone, not quite knowing why, only to fail, only to find that everything you'd done had only hurt him more..."
PostPosted: Sun Mar 05, 2006 10:04 pm


A lump formed in Emelyn's throat- and she didn't even know why, until she fully thought through Emerwyn's words, wondering if they may apply to her. The lump didn't threaten to cause tears to form, or even to create a grip on her chest, seizing her heart- like so many other lumps that formed in her throat threatened to do. Instead, this one sat, pregnant- malicious, unwilling to move in the face of the situation.

"...Not quite," she said gently, easing her voice past the lump in her craw at a hoarse whisper, "but I've tried to help someone before... tried with all my heart to save them, and it just didn't work. It was out of my power. ...Maybe everything you've done to help this person- maybe it's truly just out of your hands." Her mind was on Mizzie, that beloved sister that seemed now so long ago gone from her life. ...She had sat by her little sister and best friend's side during every chemotherapy, every radiation treatment- surgery... and she'd been there for the last moment, those final breaths of peace that were the catalyst for the greatest war in Emelyn's life. Nothing she'd been able to do had helped her sister- no amount of pleading, praying, bargaining, or hopefullness... had kept that angel on earth. And Emelyn was only now forgiving herself for that.

Emelyn


Emerwyn

PostPosted: Sun Mar 05, 2006 10:11 pm


Emerwyn nodded, finding Em's face, but not her eyes.
"What am I doing with these people. If all are brought here to suffer pain on a madman's whim, and all I can do is add to it?"
The love she had for Julian was not enough. And the love she had for Ian, she couldn't give.
PostPosted: Sun Mar 05, 2006 10:20 pm


They were going in circles, and Emelyn couldn't reconcile her understanding with this circular, neverending pathos of Emerwyn's pain. So instead, she placed both her hands on the woman's arms, staring her directly in the eyes as she spoke. She knew it would greatly distress the woman- but that was partially the point- to focus her on some sort of issue that she could resolve. She gave the gift to Emerwyn- of a pain she could deal with, a pain she could handle- something to supercede the endless self-doubt pit she couldn't possibly draw herself out of.

"You're injured, Emer. You need to get back to the village, and get someone to clean you up. Those cuts could get infected." She spoke in slow, deliberate words- though she knew that what she said was not so important as what she was doing, what she was implying.

Emelyn


Emerwyn

PostPosted: Sun Mar 05, 2006 10:29 pm


Emerwyn got a flashback. A cruel one. One that made her feel ... anger towards Emelyn.
A memory of a time, on the cliff. It was when she had first fallen ill.
"Come on. We're getting you back to the village." She'd wanted to bring her to Moreau.
Fear overcame the anger. She was frightened of the doctor. Frightened of the village. Frightened of what Emelyn was doing to her.
She couldn't stand looking into her eyes. Those eyes that seemed to reflect her own. Filled with pain, and concern. Emelyn truly cared.
But, the panicking deer within her couldn't see that. She even began to breathe more rapidly, nowhere to go.
"I-I can't," she gasped. "Nowhere to go, nowhere... I can't see..."
PostPosted: Sun Mar 05, 2006 10:34 pm


In the same breath, Em found herself consumed by a fear that she would let go her convictions. She let loose Emerwyn and backed up, grabbing her torn garbage bag and holding it to her chest as if it were one of her beloved childhood stuffed animals she'd used to comfort herself in times of need. She backed as far away from the woman as she dared without running into the woods, and she took deep breaths. She prayed that Emer wouldn't panic or hyperventilate- nothing that would warrant Emelyn having to take her back into the village to be helped.

Would she betray such newborn convictions? Did their youth make them frail, more readily violated? Emelyn felt sick to her stomach, and felt sick of her nagging guilt, that she should help Emer, should guide the very troubled woman.

"Emer, calm down. I'm not going to hurt you, or make you do anything you don't want to do," she said softly, from several feet away.

Emelyn


Emerwyn

PostPosted: Sun Mar 05, 2006 10:44 pm


As Emelyn released her, Emerwyn fell forward, onto her knees.
Her hands grabbed at the ground, kneading the dirt, uprooting the grass.
"I-I... nooo... Hurt... only pain..."
She looked up at Emelyn desperately. Somehow, she was upset Emelyn left her.
"In darkness we do seek to find
The answers to our darkest mind.
Why sought we only without light?
With it, we'd see the losing fight.

We cannot win. I am sorry." Emerwyn's eyes closed.
PostPosted: Sun Mar 05, 2006 10:47 pm


The poem- how she established the word 'we' without seeming like she meant to include Emelyn... it frightened her, and if she hadn't been clinging to her bag so tightly, she would have run her fingers through her proto quills anxiously.

"Emer... we need to get you back into the village. Is there anyone you trust? Anyone you would feel safe with? Because I don't think there's any way I can help you." Emelyn truly did feel helpless- but also, she was at her breaking point. Emer needed serious help, and Emelyn was too distraught herself to provide it- and too tired of all the darker points in life. She was nocturnal now- but some part of her yearned for the metaphorical light.

Emelyn


Emerwyn

PostPosted: Sun Mar 05, 2006 10:52 pm


Emerwyn opened her eyes once more, slowly. They were glazed, and though they looked toward Emelyn, they did not see her.

"No one can help now. I am sorry," she said again. "I will return. It is the only way." She stood up slowly. One of her knees scraped itself on a rock.
PostPosted: Sun Mar 05, 2006 10:56 pm


Em wanted to scream. Who in the world carried this much angst inside them? If it wasn't so depressing, it would be damn obnoxious.

"No one can help you? Come on, that's a little... dark. It's easy to pity yourself, Emer," she said, realizing she was being cruel but knowing that kindness hadn't worked with her. Maybe 'tough love' would. "Come on, get up... oh, you've scraped your knee. I'm going to take you to the edge of the village- it's very near- and then you're heading straight into your duplex, and taking a shower and a long, long nap." She changed her bag to one hand, and used the other to lead the woman to the forest's edge- slowly.

Emelyn


Emerwyn

PostPosted: Sun Mar 05, 2006 11:00 pm


Emerwyn wasn't talking about herself. She didn't care whether anyone could help her. She didn't believe she was the one who needed it.

Silently, she went with Emelyn. She wasn't going to explain. Whatever happened to her now, she was never going to hurt anyone again.
PostPosted: Sun Mar 05, 2006 11:05 pm


Emelyn felt like she was leading a zombie through the woods. The creature that followed her was silent, somber- as if all the life had retreated back behind her eyes, hidden behind an invisible glaze of fear and confusion. She didn't know what to say, so she was the silent leader as the night approached. When she reached the edge, the village just in sight, she wondered whether she'd made the right choice- maybe she should go in with her, make sure she didn't harm herself, or fall deeper into her depressive pit. But as distraught as Emerwyn looked before- she was practically... subdued, now, and Emelyn honestly didn't know what good she might have done. The confines of the village would change nothing.

She wrapped her arms around the woman. "Take care of yourself," she whispered in her ear, "You don't want to hurt anyone... so just know that if you're not good to yourself, I'll worry about you." She then left a soft, almost unnoticeable kiss of friendship on her cheek, and before she could gauge her reaction to the gesture of affection, Emelyn disappeared back into the jungle, shaken from her encounter but determined to find her first 'settlement'.

Emelyn


Emerwyn

PostPosted: Sun Mar 05, 2006 11:11 pm


A single tear was left where Emelyn kissed her. Emerwyn watched her disappear into the trees once more.
Why had she said the things she said? What had she done? She couldn't even gather herself.

It had finally happened. Emerwyn the Hopeful. Emerwyn, the Consoler.
It had all turned back upon her.




She had lost hope.

Her room was dark.
PostPosted: Sat Mar 11, 2006 7:44 pm


Awen hadn't thought she'd be back here in a long time. After the months she had spent outside without anything, even her video games one would think the girl would hate the confines of the bark and leaves. But a walk was just what she needed to clear her head after her long talk with Amaya. She could do this. She would save the newcomers, if not the islanders. After all..everything had an antidote right? There had to be an antidote.... Something that could reverse them back to normal... Yeah. So she was getting away not just for Avery Rex..and the skeasy new guy.... but for everyone.

She had grown unaware of how loud she was on land, tramping hrough the bushes. She had always been used to being able to tread lightly on the forest floors of her home, but after two months she had gotten used to being a little clumsier on land. A littler louder. It didn't much bother her anyway, she was alone.

Awen Zyn


Infinite Improbability

PostPosted: Sat Mar 11, 2006 8:00 pm


Back in the forest's cool darkness, Zach had begun to get a little nervous. He couldn't see much of what was ahead, and only by constantly brushing aside the heavy fern fans and other huge waxy leaves could he even know where to put his foot down next. Odds were he was lost. He'd veered away from following the cliff's edge, and for that he knew he'd have a rough time returning to his duplex. He badly wanted a shower.

His boot was caught in a couple of vines hanging on the ground, and unceremoniously Zach crashed to the wet ground. Ohh did he need that shower now... "Dammit!"

There was mud all over the side of his face, and on his clothes too! Before he could get back to walking, he noticed a sound that he'd assumed to be coming from him. It was the slow footsteps of another person right here in the forest. They were close.

Were they friend or foe? Either way, they must have heard him swear. With his one hand, he grappled a tree trunk in order to stand back on two feet, and busied himself brushing the dirt off his face. There wasn't a reason to run, as they'd only catch him more quickly if he did.

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