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Posted: Fri Nov 28, 2014 1:18 am
And all she can think is how unlike Jack he is. He's big and he's not muscular and he has gentle hands he has weak hands and he's unsure and he's not blurting drunken compliments in the form of challenges (though maybe just let that one pass) and he's boring her he's sloppy with his mouth and he's nice to her.
Hopefully Dawson's mother would forgive them for discarding one of the blankets and half of their clothing.
It's when Dawson hesitates that she puts her cold metallic bracelet on his chest and pushes lightly. "You okay?" She knows he's not because she can feel his heartbeat and the way his hands are afraid to touch her anywhere past her center. "Don't push yerself. M'not about forcing it."
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Posted: Fri Nov 28, 2014 1:38 am
The guilt became unavoidable when his shirt was removed (no Deus abs yet, nothing but pudge and hair and a mark of obedience to someone who didn't care). No Momma voice required, it was all him: What are you doing? (I dunno.) Why are your hands there? (Lean body, soft skin, feels good.) When did you think it was okay to start fooling around? (She kissed me, s'okay, I dunno.) Ah wait, there's Momma anyway tutting: I thought you were a God-lovin' Christian, boy. (And yer dead, Momma, so why dontcha go take it up with Him.)
When Chel asked if he was okay, it was then that Dawson knew he was getting in way over his head. More than that, he probably looked incredibly stupid, halfway stuck between wanting more and being a Good Boy. "I-It ain't--It ain't like that--" He fretted, imploring her to understand somehow without him bumbling through an explanation. "I like ya, Chelsea, yer a real cool gal, I just--I-I ain't used ta just...I don' wantcha thinkin' I did this fer, fer that," as if he had ever thought he had a chance before agreeing to give her the dating experience, isn't that so stupid to consider, "I got raised on the notion that a guy don't go foolin' 'round just cause he wants it, y-know, I-I ain't meanin' ta disrespect ya or nothing, I, uh, m'tryin' ta do the opposite here--"
He knew with every word he was hammering the nail of his own coffin, which his body protested, as the only thing that needed to be hammered was right across from him.
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Posted: Fri Nov 28, 2014 1:45 am
Chel watched Dawson fumble with the poise and grace of a lioness. Her arm sagged against her pillow and she just leaned against her hand and let him get through what he wanted to say. Her face was serene, all too knowing
"M'really not offended bruh." She put her unshackled hand on Dawson's cheek and stroked it with a thumb. "I understand ya perfectly n' don't expect a wink more." She did kiss his forehead lightly and said, "I appreciate the honesty."
She feels herself running circles in her head- she's already three miles ahead of his whimpering and apologizing. She knows its not because of a bodily want (physicality tells her that). He's too good for her. Docile. She's the plaything, he doesn't want to play.
But he's staying the night and she doesn't like awkwardness. She smiled.
She always smiled.
"Where you wanna go Fabio?" She hands her baton back over to him, because as far as she was concerned, he'd earned it.
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Posted: Fri Nov 28, 2014 2:11 am
Thank God. Dawson breathed a sigh of relief, thought he was still ashamed of himself and blushing fiercely; he had, after all, almost stuck her in an extremely awkward situation. A kiss on the forehead wasn't Bless Your Heart, at least: not patronizing, more like accepting.
His arms were stuck to his sides, hands wringing one another, trying to appear smaller. His body ached, his face stung. He took another deep breath, exhaled, and grew a little less jittery.
"Can we just..." The request is stupid, the need is stupid, he is so stupid. "I-I dunno...maybe, uh, maybe just...cuddle up fer the night?" The word is three times more stupid by far. Who asks for that when sex had been on the table first? Idiots, that's who. If Chel didn't think him pitiful before, she had to now. But all Dawson could think of suddenly was what lied beyond Chel's door, a world where monsters casually swam in the ocean, where his room was just a cold, windowless cell, a world where in a few days it'd be Thanksgiving and the Graces would have empty seats and wonder how that could happen.
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Posted: Fri Nov 28, 2014 2:17 am
Chel silently turned over and squashed herself into his side, with a silent gesture to spoon. She even did him the favor of picking a form of cuddling that didn't require looking at her face. What a generous, bleeding heart she was tonight.
Well, all nights. Chel always did what other people wanted.
"Then I'll see you in the mornin' cowboy," she murmured, reaching over her shoulder for a moment to kiss his lips one more time. Just to wordlessly twist the dagger- you could have had it. "We can have that hot chocolate tomorrow or somethin' too."
Her words were slurring and she was struck with Dawson's urgency to simmer down. Her chest was starting to hurt as she filled her own head with poison. "Fer the record, I liked it."
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Posted: Fri Nov 28, 2014 2:29 am
Addendum: he was so ******** stupid. "Yeah," he said with tired but earnest pep. "Yeah, good start fer the day. Even got the leftover breakfast foods t'add."
His gratefulness was bittersweet (he shouldn't have let her kiss him again) as he turned and leaned back into the pillows, securing an arm around Chel as he tucked himself into place. In spite of his efforts, Dawson's spirits lifted; he was glad they weren't facing each other. "Did ya?" he asked in a softer tone, unable to hide that hope. "Yer not just sayin' it t'make me feel better, right?"
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Posted: Fri Nov 28, 2014 2:35 am
"Do I look like a lyin' sort?" she joked. There was a light pause and she amended, "Don't answer that." She laughed and it felt nice to feel Dawson's body against her back as her ribcage extended and flexed with the motion.
Her fingers took to tracing the arm she was using as a pillow. "I always mean what I say." That was a lie. "I really liked the date."
There was probably one more thing she needed to come clean about. "Hey if I ... if I do anything during the night let me know. I get nightmares and s**t sometimes. Kick n' cry n' make a real fuss. Just wake me up, it goes away real fast." Chel wanted to be upfront about this particular disorder. It wasn't her style to sneak secrets away, as previously displayed.
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Posted: Fri Nov 28, 2014 9:51 am
A pause, a gentle squeeze. "Means a lot t'me, you sayin' that. Thanks, Chelsea..." If he hadn't been tired, he would have been more obviously giddy; smiling like a goof would just have to do. "You'll be okay," he promised as he kissed her hair. "You ain't alone. I gotcha, don' worry." It was warm and friendly and safe in the blanket and pillow pile, at least for a night. His eyes drifted closed. "Sweet dreams."
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Posted: Fri Nov 28, 2014 11:14 am
"Night," she told him, patting his arm.
Chel tried to sleep, but as usual, it didn't come. She felt Dawson's breathing grow heavier and his whole body sagged as he fell asleep. She waited until it was too frustrating to stay in the same position to get up and go to the bathroom to wash her makeup off. It was something to do.
Her phone was on the counter and she idly looked at it while she grabbed one of her makeup wipes. medigel Text to Beanstalk: u still awake? Quote: Text to Beanstalk: u wont beleve me but i was ou a date lol Her face was clean and she slapped some water on it quickly. When she padded back out to her bedroom, she figured she should probably go back to bed. She fumbled around in the darkness for a bit until she found a shirt (it appeared to be her own since she wasn't drowning in it, but who knew).
It was cold in a shirt and underwear, but she waddled out to the dorm hallway to lean over the window sill. Perhaps a touch dramatic, but she needed some air to clear her head from whatever Dawson was doing to muddle it.
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Posted: Fri Nov 28, 2014 11:23 am
Dawson began to snore softly. A few minutes after Chel found her perch, her phone buzzed. chiickadee Text to C. Craft:Really. With what, a vibrator?
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Posted: Fri Nov 28, 2014 11:26 am
medigel Text to Beanstalk: with ur fav dawson Quote: Text to Beanstalk: he was nice
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Posted: Fri Nov 28, 2014 11:48 am
chiickadee Text to C. Craft:Who the hell's that?
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Posted: Fri Nov 28, 2014 11:59 am
medigel Text to Beanstalk: dude @ the party. fatass was ur desriptjon. Quote: Text to Beanstalk: y r u still amake?
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Posted: Fri Nov 28, 2014 12:12 pm
chiickadee Text to C. Craft:No I'm sleep texting you dumbass. Quote: Text to C. Craft:Seriously though? I see your standards dropped at the speed of light.
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Posted: Fri Nov 28, 2014 12:19 pm
Chel's lips upturned in a smile and she breathed air out of her nose lightly at his indignation.medigel Text to Beanstalk: i said y r u awake duwbass Quote: Text to Beanstalk: nevr rly had standardz. whore remmebr? Quote: Text to Beanstalk: n i rememr u sayjng u were the lowest lol Quote: Text to Beanstalk: ... but he was nice Quote: Text to Beanstalk: nevr fear i ******** it up lol
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