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 Posted: Tue Jul 28, 2009 4:08 pm
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Posted: Tue Jul 28, 2009 4:09 pm
I found out why dorf wrestler champions aren't to be ******** with. Started screwing around in Adventure mode. Couldn't figure out how to do anything so my adventure would be a wrestler dorf wandering the wilds wrestling wild animals to death.
Choked a cougar out with my legs while holding it's mouth shut with one hand.
Threw a bear to the ground in a headlock while pinning it's front legs together with my legs, and tore it's eyes out with my hands.
Came across a pack of wolves and found out that six hungry wolves are a lot better at grappling than one dorf. Grabbed two wolves by the throat with either hand and tried choking them out real quick. The others started grabbing parts of me and tearing them off.
That's where my adventure ended.
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Posted: Tue Jul 28, 2009 4:15 pm
...how do you get all of this out of ASCII, Roguelike play?
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Posted: Tue Jul 28, 2009 4:17 pm
Very in depth descriptions. Mostly because the wrestling menu is
GRAB _____ WITH ______
Which adds context options like chokeholds, takedowns, eye gouging and various limb breaking.
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Posted: Tue Jul 28, 2009 4:18 pm
I wonder if the sword fighting menu is SWORD __________ WITH SWORD
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Posted: Tue Jul 28, 2009 4:21 pm
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Posted: Tue Jul 28, 2009 4:24 pm
I don't know. I've yet to use a sword. The only weapons I've used are fistfuls of sand and rocks I've picked up.
Also: a good way to keep bears away is to throw another dead bear at them.
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Posted: Tue Jul 28, 2009 4:33 pm
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Posted: Tue Jul 28, 2009 4:43 pm
Even bears are afraid of bears.
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Posted: Tue Jul 28, 2009 5:23 pm
rage, i missed when you linked me to the contest. got a link?
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Posted: Tue Jul 28, 2009 5:34 pm
Which contest did I link you to?
In case AIM decided to not deliver my IM, as it is wont to do.
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Posted: Tue Jul 28, 2009 6:49 pm
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Posted: Tue Jul 28, 2009 7:14 pm
"First of all, a warning. This book is packed with such useful and POWERFUL information, it should be approached with caution. Amazon has not provided a synopsis, and rightly so. I attempted to download a summary to my computer and my monitor EXPLODED. Normally, I would complain to the author and demand a refund, but the mere opportunity to witness this miracle of written word is payment for my loss ten times over.
In addition to the eternal question "What are these strawberries doing on my nipples?", you'll also learn life saving information, such as answers to questions like "Should I be concerned that an as of yet unidentified rodent species has taken up residence in my colon?" Additionally, you'll find instructions including battle tactics, suggested weaponry and equipment, and other fun facts for assailing the lost city of Atlantis to wrest control from the resident Merlords, giving you an access to a rare element that is known to give chewing gum viagra-like properties (for Asians and Serbs only, unfortunately). I save further examples for fear of your safety.
The only negative I can give about this book is the fact that reaching the end of it will give you an intense sadness. The only parallel I can construct for the amount of sorrow this will cause is to beseech you to imagine yourself as a T-rex in a room full of T-ball poles and large soapy bubbles. Your stubby arms would render the pleasure-power of this room woefully out of reach. Only the strong-willed should undertake reading this book."
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Posted: Tue Jul 28, 2009 7:16 pm
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Posted: Tue Jul 28, 2009 8:28 pm
Goddamn it.
Samurai Showdown is such a good game. Why give a s**t about KOF when there's SS2.
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