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 Posted: Tue Oct 17, 2006 3:15 pm
I sat up and looked at Akira. I kept my expression pretty much like Saturn's, not letting anything betray me. "I don't know what you're talking about." I said quietly. Akira didn't need my own hardships dragging him down. Besides I caused them, I would have to live with them.
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Posted: Tue Oct 17, 2006 3:39 pm
(Akira)
I sighed, with a genuinely pained expression on my face. I said, "That's it, isn't it, Hotaru." I looked at the floor. I sat down and said, "You know, it really pains me to know that my friends are hiding the truth from me. I've been brutally honest about a lot of things with you, Hotaru."
That's when I said, not fighting back the tears in my eyes this time; "I'm sorry if you don't want to talk about it. Losing someone you deeply care for... Losing the person that you love... That really hurts. I should know. Because today... Is Saturday. It's the 2nd anniversary of my little sister's passing. She would've been 6 if she had lived. But for me, at least my sister's death wasn't in vain. I go on, living my life, because I know my sister is still alive, within my heart, and within my soul. She always saw me as a helpful person, and like you, she hated to see me in pain. I'm telling you this because Natsume wanted me to be honest. She once said, 'Pain will destroy you if you let it. Face the pain, head-on.' To that, I'll add this. Know that you are not alone. You have friends by your side." That's when I wiped the tears off my face. I stood up and for the second time, I genuinely smiled at Hotaru. I grinned, "The people you care for aren't dead. They will always be alive in your heart. That's why I do the things that I do. It's my duty to protect the people that I care for. Because I don't give up on the people that mean the world to me. Just a little something the Senshi taught me."
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Posted: Tue Oct 17, 2006 7:43 pm
I said nothing for a moment just listening to Akira talk. When he finished I still didn't say anything. I stood up and walked over to him. I looked up at him silently cursing the fact I was so damn short. Even for my age I was tiny. I sighed and looked away a moment then looked at him again.
"Some secrets need to be kept, some stories should never be told, and some reasons shouldn't be understood." I said softly.
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Posted: Tue Oct 17, 2006 8:50 pm
(Akira)
I replied, "That may be true. But you know about the real me. The people in Strata Academy only sees a mask. They don't know that... I am a person who had the card of despair handed to him too many times. Usually, if I was a normal person, I would've given up and let the pain and sorrow control me. But the human spirit is quite an amazing thing. Despite the many times that fate tries to crush it, it stays very resilient, no matter what. And even though we've both lost the people we both care for, the ideals that they stood for are still alive within us. They are physically dead, but they reside within the heart and soul within us all."
I looked at Hotaru. I said, "Never let the people that you care for die for nothing. Hold on to their ideals, and fight on. What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger."
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Posted: Wed Oct 18, 2006 4:35 am
I watched Akira closely and smiled almost bitterly. "What doesn't kill you might make you stronger but that doesn't mean it can't take away those who are important to you." I stated. I walked away from Akira and leaned on my desk staring down at the symbol on it.
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Posted: Wed Oct 18, 2006 10:57 am
(Akira)
I replied, "That may be true too. However, the ideals that the people you care for can never be taken away. They'll always stay within your heart and soul. To protect the people I care for... That's my only desire."
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Posted: Wed Oct 18, 2006 3:20 pm
I turned to look at him. "Your only desire might be to protect them and to keep them alive in yourself. But how can you do that when it's your fault that they died!"
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Posted: Wed Oct 18, 2006 3:50 pm
(Akira)
I looked at Hotaru. I sighed, "What happened to the people we care for can't be blamed on us, Hotaru. I don't think it's your fault that you lost a person you cared for. He sacrificed his life knowing that you were going to fight for a better future. Hotaru, you shouldn't blame yourself... That person died protecting you. It's not your fault. It was never your fault. If you think that it was your fault, then you have disappointed that person by losing hope. I don't intend of losing hope."
I turned my back at Hotaru. I said, "Hope is a light that never dies unless you will it to. If you will it to perservere, then no matter how much fate tries to crush it, it will always be reborn... I will never lose the hope that I can make the world a better place, because I know I can make the world a better place, because I believe in myself... And Natsume believes in me. Don't drown in sadness and sorrow, Hotaru, because you will only disappoint yourself, your friends, and the people you care for. And if you do blame yourself, then the person that you care for and your friends will never be reborn, and they will be lost forever... And you don't want that to happen, do you?"
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Posted: Wed Oct 18, 2006 4:02 pm
I spun around. "What would you know Akira?" I all but demanded. "You speak as if you know me! You try to sound as if you know what's happening when you don't! You don't know anything about me so how dare you make an assumptions! And don't you dare speak to me about being reborn!"
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Posted: Wed Oct 18, 2006 10:49 pm
(Akira)
While staring at nothingness, I replied, "While you may be right about the fact that I don't know anything about you, I certainly know that hiding the pain wouldn't help anyone. It wouldn't help you or Saturn fight the forces of darkness any better. While I'm not saying you should be an emo, you should try and learn how to trust the people that are close to you. It was my decision to trust you. You should respect that choice."
That's when I unbuttoned my pajama shirt and I revealed the scars on my back once more. And this time, I let the pajama shirt drop down. I sternly said, "But I do know this. The pain of losing the people you care for... Is nothing compared to the pain that you feel when you know that the people you cared for don't really care for you. I know pain. And I know about hatred. Don't think that I'm stupid, Hotaru. Because my sister sacrificed her life to save mine. Before she uttered her final words, she said, 'Just once, I wanted to save you.'. I'm sure you understand 'self-sacrifice'. I still care enough to sacrifice my life for you, Hotaru. But I won't do it because I'm stupid. I'll do it because it's the right thing to do."
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Posted: Thu Oct 19, 2006 4:41 am
I said nothing but when he showed the scars again I closed my eyes and looked away. I felt that familiar wave of neasua. It took me a moment before I could speak again. "I never said I didn't respect the fact that you told me. But, Akira we've only know each other for a day. And someday I'll tell you, but....I." I paused for a minute. "....not now."
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Posted: Thu Oct 19, 2006 8:00 am
(Akira)
I picked up my pajama shirt and I put it back on me. I smiled, "That's fine. I can wait. I assure you, all of your parents and friends can trust me. I'm not..."
That's when I got a searing headache. But this time, instead of the darkness, this time, this headache showed me... What seemed to be the past. At least, PART of my past. I saw myself as a prince, fighting against the dark forces. And strangely enough, it showed me in Titan, one of Saturn's moons.
I sighed, "Whoa... That was strange."
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Posted: Fri Oct 27, 2006 10:12 am
ANNOUNCEMENT:
Until Tatyana gets back, this RP is closed.
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Posted: Sun Nov 05, 2006 4:27 pm
(( Hey ya'll I have returned from the dead! ))
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Posted: Sun Nov 05, 2006 4:30 pm
Then I declare this RP open AGAIN!
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