Welcome to Gaia! ::

"Okay somebody get STeven a q-tip to hit the bass drum with!"

lets play this thong... song... so we got him a thong for the end of the yeaar.

Previous Director:
"I'm eight foot tall and I'm wearing a yellow shirt! I'm like bigbird! How can you not see me?!"

Another Director:
"Well, that's more better, but it will be awhile before we're most bestest."

Current Director:
I'm paraphrasing because I was not here when he said it:
You've got to be the best at whatever you do. If I was a pumpkin farmer I would be the very best pumpkin farmer I could be. I would get up, and I would say "Woman- Where are my seeds?"

When correcting our spots on the marching field "Move just a frog hair"

"Five minute water break!" Funny because it's never more than a minute

Our Asisstant Band Director is a Psycoanalysis. He started with middle school band, then worked with the crazies in prison, and finally moved to high school band. He'd tell us that the people he worked with were slowly getting saner.

Our band director is fat. He'd rub his own belly for good luck.

We had an assistant band director who every one loved and who was really lenient about everything. During marching practice he'd wear a shirt that said "Don't worry, I've got you sweating so hard they can't tell you are crying." Read just the bold.
This same guy looked like Santa Clause and would ALWAYS say "Oh, geeze." ALWAYS. "Mr. Koran, I lost my music." "Oh, geeze." "Mr. Koran, I'm going to be late." "Oh, geeze." "Mr. Koran, my instrument it broken." "Oh, geeze." The way he said it was soooo funny.

My marching band show is based off of The Divine Comedy (Dante's Inferno).

So we had finally gotten to the second movement, and my bd was like, "And today we will go through... PURGATORY!"

During winter drumline:
Matt: *stops the drumline, turns on megaphone, tells people what they were doing wrong*
"Ok, start at E."
*turns off megaphone*
...
*turns megaphone back on*
"E as in... don't suck."
*turns off megaphone and immediately turns metronome on*

Happened to my friend from a different band:
*friend's cell phone rings*
Richter: Give me that.
*friend gives him phone*
*he puts it in his pocket*
... (near end of class)
*sound of vibrating phone*
Richter: Woah... there's a party in my pants!

Matt: *eats Wheat Thins angrily while walking around half of school searching for patch cord*

Matt: *wears electrical tape unibrow*

Matt before every show: Don't be that kid.
Me while sliding down some other school's very long railing: I'M BEING THAT KIIIIID!!1!

Our band director is such an a**, but hilarious at times. He does cheerleaders impressions. I think that speaks for itself xd