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 Posted: Mon Jan 24, 2005 3:56 pm
Astri sad ? I don't need to know what was said here. I can probably guess, anyway. But...you alright, Q? JoVo? Everyone? *worries* I'm alright now, except for the all-nighter ahead. Right now, I'm just worried about everyone else. Montigo, you don't need your coworkers' agreement at all. But if you really think it's necessary, ask them why he would even be so "sweet" to them. I'd be suspicious too if an older man I hardly knew was constantly commenting or offering things, if not scared. You tried, they're the ones that won't stop playing with fire. Funny that they'd try to force their opinions about your life on you, but then again they don't know when to mind their own business (namely, the gossiping incidents).
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Posted: Mon Jan 24, 2005 7:11 pm
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Posted: Tue Jan 25, 2005 4:57 am
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Posted: Tue Jan 25, 2005 7:01 am
oh ya... i forgot i told you about the gossip incidents... I hate work now. I was glad to get away from the High school soap opera.. then my work turned int one.
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Posted: Tue Jan 25, 2005 9:50 pm
I was talking to a friend the other day and this conversation occurred after he called me a shemale (and I called him an a*****e):
Me: That's really offensive.
Him: Sorry, but really I don't mean to offend.
Me: Ok.
Him: I mean to joke and have fun, and until I find the correct word to call you I'm going to experiment. I dare not call you an it (that's horrible) and I don't wanna call you a girl or a boy or a man or a woman. I've read enough to know.
Me: I'm a genderqueer. You can call me Ryan or a boy, because those are what I'm comfortable with.
Him: Call yourself that but I don't like that term.
Me: Why don't you like it?
Him: Queer is a derogatory term.
Me: It can be, when used by people who mean it that way.
Him: And unless I mean to cause harm I will not use it.
Me: Genderqueer isn't derogatory.
Him: I'm not going to say or use it.
Me: I find shemale much more derogatory.
Him: Sorry.
Me: You think it's fine to joke around and use that term, yet you won't use the term I actually prefer.
He then proceeded to end the conversation. He's generally a good person, but things like this bother me a lot. I understand it's a difficult concept for many people, but... that doesn't make it okay to call me a shemale jokingly, and refuse to call me what I prefer.
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Posted: Wed Jan 26, 2005 5:07 am
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Posted: Thu Jan 27, 2005 7:55 am
Awr, *gives Rej some cookies* neutral Yeah, my friends are just starting to understand that I'm comfortable being perceived as he or she. But they still correct themselves all the time when they "mix up" Whatcha gonna do, eh?
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Posted: Thu Jan 27, 2005 9:38 am
I get to go to a neurologist! I have a high white blood cell count!
I like scrubs!
And I REALLY don't want to go to Kendo anymore...
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Posted: Thu Jan 27, 2005 4:12 pm
I told you Scrubs was awesome. You never listen to me. rolleyes
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Posted: Thu Jan 27, 2005 6:34 pm
FranklinFrdr: but I really do have to go, just remember how much you ******** me over.
VerhextSelbst: I know. I know. I ******** up.
FranklinFrdr: god ********, rat eating son of a b***h
FranklinFrdr: I promised myself i owuld say that to you
VerhextSelbst: Feel better?
FranklinFrdr: not really
VerhextSelbst: Want to try again?
FranklinFrdr: not really
FranklinFrdr: it took me half an hour to come up with that
VerhextSelbst: I'm guessing apologizing won't help?
FranklinFrdr: probably not
FranklinFrdr: you could give me my best friend back?
FranklinFrdr: that would make everything peachy again
I have, like, this overwhelming urge to ******** up friendships. It wouldn't be so bad if I weren't so goddamned good at it. If I just randomly broke promises or lied or something, that'd be fine. People would just know better than to trust me and everything would be cool.
But no, that would be too easy. Instead, I wait for the exact right time to start breaking promises. I wait until it will really, really hurt. That one thing, the thing you spill only in the strictest confidence...
Haha! I ******** suck. stressed
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Posted: Thu Jan 27, 2005 7:20 pm
I've met more people that like the word "queer" than "shemale." In fact, other than intrusive pop ups and SPAM titles, I have yet to see someone whe actually identified with the term. To each their own, but I hope he can come to some level of understanding your use of "queer." Jack: The musical episode of Scrubs was hilarious. Then again, people bursting out in song and dance randomly is always amusing to watch. I have the same problem sometimes, Jack. Except they usually never find out, which makes me feel even more guilty about what I've done. My brain just doesn't always make the connection between, say, personal information and things to talk about over dinner. I guess the only way I've coped with it is becoming an overanalytical, neurotic mess. Before I speak it takes a second for me to rethink what about what I'm about to say, so that I don't inadvertently say something I may regret. That's probably why I suck at conversation because I'm too busy pulling apart conversation to say what I want to. The only thing you can do is to learn to keep yourself in check. Plunging yourself into a place where no one trusts is the same as cutting yourself off entirely from anyone you can confide in as well. Trust me, that isn't a fun place to be either. Cliche, but true: Moderation is the key.
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Posted: Thu Jan 27, 2005 8:43 pm
Today was the worst the day ever. Okay, not really, but it sure felt like it for a while. I really dislike being a girl. PMS and cramps just really bother me. Not to mention the mood swings and general ickyness of bleeding for a week.
LoL, if you're still with me, I comend you.
I got in trouble at work a few weeks for looking "unprofessional". My manager told me that I needed to do laundry once in a while instead of leaving my uniform on the floorboard of my car. No point in arguing, he knows for a fact I do this. What? Yeah, okay, whatever. I don't, but apparently that doesn't matter.
See, I don't have a washer and dryer. I just have to hope that nothing happens to my uniform until I get to the laundrymat again. I have three cats and two dogs. When he stopped me, I was on my way to the breakroom so I could lint-roller pants. Anyway, he said that if he had to talk to me about it again, I'd be written up.
So, in my locker at work, I keep tampons, pamprin, jolly ranchers, and my name tag. Since Val works in the same place, we share a locker. I think he had a bag of chips and a couple of sodas in there. Nothing worth stealing, right? We never bothered to get a lock because they could cut it off and search the locker anytime anyway. For some reason they decided to clean out all the lockers lacking locks with no warning what-so-ever. They threw away everything in my locker including my freaking name tag!
When I went into work this morning, I was counting on having the lint-roller, tampons and pamprin already there, but no! Nothing! I had, literally, the worst cramps of my life today. I was in tears at the register.
My manager drags me back into his office and tells me that my pants have cat hair on them. PMS does nothing for my social skills. I say, "Duh". He gets on to me about it and asks me what I intend to do. I say, "Well, I intended to have a lint-roller in my locker when I got here this morning." He pointedly ignores it and gives me a write up. Then he says that I just don't seem like I really want to be there. If I can't at least pretend like I want to be there, he doesn't really want me there.
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh!
I hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate double hate, loathe entirely my job. scream stressed
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Posted: Thu Jan 27, 2005 8:56 pm
See, the problem is... it was a concious decision on my part. He specifically told me not to tell, then threatened me within inches of my life if I ever told. More specifically, if I ever told the exact person that I told. She asked me what I talked to him about I said, "Ummmmm, I can't tell." She pressed it and something in my head just said, "Oh, just tell her. She has a right to know." So, I spilled. Even as I was telling her, I was blocking him from every Instant Messaging program I use because I knew he'd be pissed. Edit: It really is kind of a long, complicated story. Guy likes girl. The feeling is not mutual. Guy is making a fool of himself. Guy kisses girl. Girl is embarrassed and tells no one. Guy tells me to prove that he really does have a chance with girl. I tell girl's best friend. You know how this part goes. rolleyes Guy finds out I told. The conversation (there was more to it) above happens after he gets everyone on the freaking planet to IM me asking me to unblock him. Guy leaves, only to return sporadically through the night and mention to me how lucky I am to not live too close to him because he would have killed me already, inform me of how many walls he's destroyed and how many weapons he's broken while pretending that he's attacking me, etc... Man, I just wanted him to stop being stupid. It was seriously painful to watch make such a fool out of himself. Now he's all thinking about trying to date a girl that hates him or a friend of her's... Bleh, I wash my hands of this! He has been re-blocked and I am totally just going to let people do whatever stupid s**t they feel like doing from now on!
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Posted: Fri Jan 28, 2005 10:55 am
That sucks, Crafty.
Really, really sucks. cry
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Posted: Sat Jan 29, 2005 12:53 pm
I second that. Jack: That straightens out things. I'm betting in that situation someone would have said something eventually anyway. Sure, you betrayed his trust, but you did what you felt you had to do. On the other hand, it's him that overreacting. Violence and attacking things isn't exactly the best way of coping with life, if it can be considered coping at all.
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![[Q]'s avatar](https://a1cdn.gaiaonline.com/dress-up/avatar/ava/23/15/1f06246f41523_flip.png?t=1465986572_6.00_11)
