Welcome to Gaia! ::

She had stumbled her way into the bathroom and closed the door turning quickly to lean against it. Standing there for a moment she tried to calm her muddled thoughts and her insecurities. They threatened to overwhelm and cripple her to the point she could think of nothing else.

Shun's voice followed her not long after and Mitsu clenched her eyes shut tightly her hands coming up to hold her head. No..no that's not what the problem was.....or was it? Did she not trust his reaction? Or did she not trust her own?

Mitsu opened her eyes again to peer at the bathroom mirror no more than five feet away mounted to the wall with heavy bolts. For now she was out of sight but if she moved a little closer....could she do it? Could she see for herself the damage? Maybe if she face the problem first on her own it would be easier to show Shun, to share and have him help. He wanted to help her so badly, it was no secret.

Frowning deeply she continued to stare at the mirror, unable to give Shun a verbal answer of any kind. Her hands clutched her arms a little tighter and slowly she moved forward one step at a time. At first her eyes were averted but as she stepped closer she pepped herself up to look. Breath steady and just look. How bad could it be?

Instead of steady breathing it came as almost labored breaths but soon Mitsu turned and stared at someone she didn't even know. Short buzzed hair with ears too large for her head, frightened and wild looking red eyes that bordered more on animalistic than they normally did. The gown was ill fitting and hung off her slender frame and the scars...it was thankful she was so pale but she sadly knew where to look. They were...everywhere...across her throat, down her arms, across her jaw. Her gaze ventured lower and she could see the finer scars along her legs. Thankfully the ones along her arms looked the worse but still. It was too much, this wasn't supposed to have happened. How could they have done this to her?

As her gaze shifted back up and she stared into her own eyes, her gaze hardening as anger brewed all over again. Screaming might have been on the agenda if she had been able but instead she unwrapped her arms from herself to grab the mirror and gave it a tug. At first it refused to budge but as she tugged on it again the bolts began to whine and the stone wall began to crumble. Another tug and she managed to pull the mirror off the wall and quickly threw it into another shattering it on impact. In a blind rage she followed after the mirror and began to wail on the larger pieces shattering them into tiny fragments despite the damage it did to her hands.

Mitsu had managed to pound a great deal of the larger pieces into dust before Shun was there holding her back. She tried to struggle free, swiping and clawing at the air trying to get at the remains of the mirror. When it seemed he wasn't going to let her go so easily Mitsu finally began to calm though her body was still rigid, her breathing coming in hard.

Shun didn't understand. She wasn't sure she understood but the anger and insecurity was real enough.

Eventually she went nearly limp in his grasp, eyes staring at nothing in particular.

If only it were so simple. The fight in her was gone so at least Shun would find no resistance when he lifted her hand. There were tiny cuts all along her knuckles, some of them with a stray piece of glass here and there but that seemed to be the extent of her injuries. Physically they would heal fairly quickly but it was the mental aspect that Mitsu seemed to be lacking.

Just be good and don't make a fuss. It's pointless to struggle. Her free hand reached up to touch the collar around her neck but found it wasn't there. Somehow she hadn't noticed it was gone until now but she suppose with this realization there was a hint of relief.

Mitsu was mostly still while Shun tended to her wounds, her eyes looking distant and unfocused. She barely flinched when he picked the glass from her hand and cleaned up the blood. Her mind was elsewhere, back on the island and in the lab. The tech was clearly visible though he had no features of which to point out. Just a moving mouth that spoke of her as nothing more than garbage to be disposed of. Something to be taken apart, used and thrown away. Scraps.

She could hear the drill even now, buzzing and whirling before causing intense pain. Mitsu flinched then but there was no actual pain, just the memory of what had happened and she brought her hands to her head trying to drown it all out. Why couldn't she just forget? Why did she have to remember every little detail?

It took her a moment to realize Shun was asking her a question of sorts. Not sure what had been ask she simply nodded, eyes staring passed him and even beyond the wall of the bathroom.

Mitsu's distant gaze suddenly focused, her eyes fluttering rapidly for a moment as Shun pressed his lips against her's. Her expression soon softened as she closed her eyes pressing into the gesture to let him know it was a welcome distraction.

She hadn't even realized he had picked her up so it was a little odd to see she was in a different room when she finally pulled away. Her eyes wandered until they finally settled on the clothes sitting on the bed. A short dress she often wore around school. Her fingers trailed across the fabric but as much as she liked the dress she didn't want to put it on. She wanted something to cover her arms and tried to convey this by pointing to the dress and then running her hand down her arms. Hopefully he would realize she wanted something with coverage.

Mitsu frowned when she had no way to answer his question. What had happened was she had gotten angry. Angry at the Hunters and angry at herself. Maybe angry at everyone she really didn't know, it was long overdue emotions that had just exploded and she had given no real thought to her actions it just seemed like a good idea at the time. The best way to make her mental anguish stop.

When he asked about his own scars Mitsu's brows furrowed deeply, regarding him for a moment before shaking her head. How was she supposed to explain? She certainly didn't like her own but she didn't think his were ugly they just made her sad. No one should go through that much abuse....no one.

Trying to think of a way to explain Mitsu brought her hand up and touched her eyes before bringing that hand down to touch her arm where the scars were. She hoped to convey that as 'seeing them' but she wasn't sure that would get across. Next she brought up the same hand and tapped the side of her head. Remember. They made her remember and that was more punishment then them actually being there. But would Shun understand?

He didn't quite get it but in a way she was ashamed of them. She had just gotten used to accepting her appearance and now she was going to have to do it all over again. She didn't think herself beautiful, not as she was now. Now she was just a symbol of where stupidity can get you.

Sighing she went ahead and changed thought she seemed leery to undress in front of him. Something that wouldn't have been an issue before was a problem now. She was shy about her body and about being seen.

Slipping on the dress quickly she grabbed the jacket and put it on as well. It didn't exactly match but it served its purpose. Mitsu was certain some of her chokers and collars would cover her throat just fine...it was just a matter of putting them on and not freaking out.

When he spoke of getting revenge again Mitsu reached out for his hand shaking her head. She pointed at her arm and at her throat, specifically at the scars and then pointed to him. Mitsu didn't want to risk the same thing happening to him in his quest for vengeance.

Mitsu's eyes averted as she shook her head. She didn't know how to explain this way, she didn't know how to make him understand. It was the meaning behind those scars. Even more so was his attitude toward getting more.

No...NO! It might not be as simple as that. It could easily be far worse! Mitsu had been so close to breaking down. If Candace had asked her again...no no she couldn't think about it and she didn't want to think about the same thing happening to Shun.

She shook her head furiously, her hands clutching the sides of her head like she was in pain. Why was he being so foolish? And why did him acting this way push her to the brink? It was hard to say if she wanted to break down and cry again or break something else.

'Stop' She mouthed. 'Stop' She kept repeating that word, her eyes clenched shut as she shook her head no. Perhaps she had been so used to sedation pushing herself now only pushed herself too far. The anger, the sadness, despair, they had all been so muted before and now they were fresh, raw and intense emotions that hit her like a physical blow. Maybe it would have been better if she hadn't come back.