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 Posted: Tue Sep 04, 2012 2:03 am
Briar felt a curious warm senation in his chest when Vixen declared that she was glad he'd been born. He examined the warmth, bemused and unsure what it could mean. He'd never felt anything like it before, and could only rule out what it wasn't based on prior experiences. It was a very light, buoyant sensation; could this be what happiness truly felt like? Not having much of a working knowledge of positive emotions, he couldn't be sure.
And though he was grateful to Vixen for her conviction, he still shook his head as conflicting emotions and thoughts jockeyed over which was truer. It was hard to forge new paths of thought when the old ones were so deeply ingrained, even if it had been some time since he'd last seen his birthland or any of his family. Sometimes Briar sat alone at night and still wondered if they'd had the right of it all along. Until Vixen had come forward there had been no one to naysay them, nor offer words and gestures of comfort and what was clearly liking towards him.
Needless to say, the male found the situation just a tad confusing.
"I.....don't know what to say," Briar said, truly at a loss for words. He turned his face up towards Vixen and let some of the tangle clogging his head and heart to show in his eyes, hoping they could provide a better response than his words.
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Posted: Sun Sep 23, 2012 12:23 pm
Briar looked up at her with so many thoughts and emotions swirling through his expressive eyes. There was mostly confusion, obviously fueled by deep-seated hurt, and maybe even a little hope. So many different emotions and far too many were negative. Vixen felt her heart melt for the male in front of her and harden towards his family even further.
He didn't know what to say? She certainly did. She had a nice, four letter word for his family. A word she'd never used before to describe anything. Vixen was a fox that believed there was goodness in everybody, but any fox that would go out of their way to abuse one of their own children deserved the title of 'Evil'.
"Your parents...your family is wrong. Everything they ever said to you. I don't know if they're stupid, misguided, or truely evil, but I do know that they are not right. No one is useless and no one is perfect. If you hadn't been born, Briar, the world would be a sadder place." She said, looking directly at him so that he would be able to see she was being sincere. "If I had never gotten a chance to meet you...that thought saddens me the most."
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Posted: Sun Sep 23, 2012 2:10 pm
"Would it really," Briar asked quietly, sitting still as a stone. He wanted to understand, needed to, felt as though if he could then something important might finally happen. He didn't know what; the feeling was like he was standing at the edge of a very tall cliff, and until he was able to take those last steps the plunge over the edge nothing would change in his life.
So he stared hard at Vixen, trying with all his might to understand, while he repeated his question.
"Would it really sadden you, if you'd never met me? If I'd never been born, if you'd never just happened across me by chance, you'd never know I existed. All your life up until today you didn't know and you seem happy, so what difference could meeting me have possibly made?"
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Posted: Wed Sep 26, 2012 3:18 pm
Vixen frowned thoughtfully, trying to put her thoughts and emotions into the correct words. "That version of me, the version that never met you, would have continued on, happily ignorant of your existence. That's true, but she'd walk passed that spot where we met no different than before." Vixen replied. "And that is the difference. By this same time, she wouldn't know about foxes with tails like yours. She wouldn't have spent an enjoyable day with a new friend, she wouldn't have had fun racing with you, and she wouldn't be having this conversation now. More than likely, that me would still be wandering about, still chasing that silly butterfly."
Vixen shook her head, hoping she was explaining this correctly. It wasn't easy to explain something that didn't happen. "That me would have missed so much fun and laughter that the thought saddens this me. Foxes...impact each other's lives; sometimes a lot more than they think, or even mean to." The deer-fox sighed. "I'm not sure if I'm saying this right. Maybe if you thought of someone that you've met that's been a positive influence on you, and pretend you've never met them. Take out all the fun times, the laughter, and even the not so nice times that you shared and went through together. Doesn't that make you sad?"
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Posted: Wed Sep 26, 2012 11:40 pm
Briar's hollyberry-colored eyes and small smile were a strange combination of heartbreakingly charming and sorrowful. "I'd be very, very sad if I'd never met you," he said quietly.
To his embarassment he felt tears starting to form in his eyes. He quickly hid his face, trying to keep his voice normal.
"I never had friends when I was a kit, and maybe I've met one or two pleasant foxes after I grew up and left home. But I never really had anyone I'd call a friend. The me that never met you and the me that did meet you are like......a lot's the same, but a lot is also so completely different."
To his shame Briar heard his voice crack once in the last sentence. He fought to keep his voice steady for the rest of the sentence, and keep the tears firmly inside.
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Posted: Mon Oct 01, 2012 8:11 pm
Vixen was only slightly surprised he mentioned her as the person he’d missed. She’d almost hoped he’d mention someone else so that she could think he’d had a little compassion as a kit. She watched his eyes start to get watery before he hid his face from her, and teared up in sympathy. She felt…not pity exactly, she wouldn’t pity Briar, couldn’t pity him. He went through all of that and survived; he was a strong fox, whether he knew it or not, so pity was not what she felt. More like horror and sorrow for what he went through.
She listened to Briar, watching his ears and the back side of his cheek, the only bits of his face she could see from her position. When his voice cracked, she licked the back of his ear for comfort. “That’s what I was trying to say, yes. You put it much more succinctly than I did.”
Vixen puffed a small sigh and nuzzled the back of Briar’s cheek. “Feel better, Briar, you don’t have to see them or live by what they said any more. And if they come looking for you, I’ll make an exception to using my antlers against other foxes.” She waved her stubby tail a little and a few, soft tinkles flowed around them.
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Posted: Mon Oct 01, 2012 8:54 pm
That coaxed a weak smile out of Briar. "I'm not too worried it would have to come to that. They don't know where I am, and unless something happens to destroy their territory they don't really like to leave it. Besides-," Briar's voice faltered. It took him a few false starts before he could finish the sentence. "Besides, their fighting style relies mostly on strength and is predictable if you know it. I know I'm faster than them, if I really did meet them again someday."
He gave Vixen a tremulous smile. "You're very fast too, with your slighter build. I don't doubt that even with glancing blows you could do a lot of damage over a fight."
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Posted: Fri Nov 09, 2012 9:12 am
"I don't normally fight, so they may beat me in technique, but most foxes hesitate when they see my antlers anyway. I think I could get the drop on them." She teased with a smile. She didn't think it would come to that, they were obviously too stupid to realize the value of their own family. Like Briar said, they probably wouldn't leave their own territory.
She tilted her head and smiled at Briar. "When you feel better, would you like to stay with me? I was thinking about visiting my daughter. She's been the easiest of my children to keep up on, and I have a sudden urge to see her again." He boys had grown up with Dasher, she wasn't as close with them, but she really needed to get in touch with them too, now that she thinks on it.
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Posted: Wed Nov 14, 2012 2:56 pm
Briar blinked and stared at Vixen, sure that he’d misheard her for a moment there. Even if she said she liked him and was glad that she had met him, it wasn’t exactly a recommendation to suddenly become traveling partners. Or was it? He’d be the first to admit that he’d kept up a fairly solitary lifestyle, so when it came to socially accepted norms maybe he wasn’t qualified to decide what counted as weird and what counted as commonplace.
Still, he had to be sure he hadn’t misheard.
“You want me to stay with you,” he asked in a slow, uncertain voice, eyes curious as they sought out Vixen’s. “As in just a travel partner while you’re on the journey to visit your daughter, or-?” He couldn’t bring himself to finish the sentence; it just sounded far too presumptuous of him to suggest that Vixen had suggested something to the effect of them becoming denmates and not just temporary travel buddies. Briar felt his cheeks flush a little, ashamed of his bold thoughts.
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Posted: Tue Jun 11, 2013 7:55 pm
Or? She wondered, briefly what could have been at the end of that sentence when the dog-fox blushed and she suddenly realized where his mind had taken the invitation. Oh. Vixen tilted her head, the idea coming to her easily now that she'd thought of it. Her and Briar...as mates? Nothing in her was screaming in defiance of that; in fact, she liked Briar. A lot. She could definitely see herself as Briar's mate, and she was sure her daughter would love him too. But, she didn't want to push the other fox into anything.
Vixen smiled at Briar widely and touched her nose to his cheek. “We can be whatever you're comfortable with. We can start as travel partners but...I wouldn't mind if we stayed together longer than that. And if, maybe, we end up as mates, well–” She waggled her stubby tail and set her bells to jingling. “I kinda like that idea.” there. Hopefully that was clear without being pushy. The last thing she wanted to be, after what he told her about his family, was be pushy about such a big decision.
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Posted: Wed Jun 12, 2013 5:11 pm
Wait, what? Briar felt the blood drain from his face, then rush back in full force. Mates? He had just thought something like maybe really good friends, like their own miniature tribe or something. Families banded together and roved around all the time, after all, and didn’t call themselves tribes. But them potentially becoming mates?
If he was being honest with himself Briar knew he probably already had a little crush on Vixen. He tried dismissing it though since he’d come to terms that he’d probably bond with anyone who showed kindness to him, the way a stray might attach themselves to someone willing to care for him. That wasn’t really healthy or any basis for a romantic relationship.
But Vixen had said “maybe”. That was a comfort. Even if he might just be imprinting, she was mentally and emotionally healthy and could monitor the progress of their relationship accordingly. She knew he wasn’t exactly whole, and he was sure that if she didn’t think they were suited for becoming mates after all she’d tell him so. Whether or not that would mean an end to their association altogether Briar wasn’t sure. He quickly cut off his train of thought before he sent himself into another panic attack.
Throughout the entire thought process his face had drained to pale again. Now, as he faced Vixen and tried to untangle his tongue enough to make it work, the blush returned. “Y-Yea, maybe. I suppose we’ll have to just s-see what happens.”
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