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 Posted: Fri Sep 26, 2008 2:32 am
Wicked Feenix Gekigami Three men went camping, two of the three forgot to bring a tent so they all ended up in one tent. They slept three in a row like the roman numeral lll They fell asleep and later in the middle of the night, the one on the right wakes up, "I dreamed I just got a hand job from Jessica Alba!" HE said happily The man on the far left wakes up and exclaims excitedly, "I dreamed I got a hand job from Beyonce!!" The man sleeping in the middle, woken up by the other two sat up to share his dream as well, "I dreamed I was skiing!!" biggrin Yup. Me and my sick sense of humor for laughing at this. lol lol *does skiing hand motions*
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Posted: Sat Sep 27, 2008 3:51 am
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Fashionable Businesswoman
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Posted: Sun Sep 28, 2008 1:06 pm
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Posted: Sun Sep 28, 2008 7:10 pm
Gekigami Three men went camping, two of the three forgot to bring a tent so they all ended up in one tent. They slept three in a row like the roman numeral lll They fell asleep and later in the middle of the night, the one on the right wakes up, "I dreamed I just got a hand job from Jessica Alba!" HE said happily The man on the far left wakes up and exclaims excitedly, "I dreamed I got a hand job from Beyonce!!" The man sleeping in the middle, woken up by the other two sat up to share his dream as well, "I dreamed I was skiing!!" biggrin Eww.that's so bad! But funny. >.> Ashamed...
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Fashionable Businesswoman
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Posted: Mon Sep 29, 2008 12:57 am
I ish scarred for life...
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Posted: Tue Sep 30, 2008 2:19 pm
elf of vampirism I ish scarred for life... Nah. Just admit you enjoyed it! twisted
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Posted: Tue Sep 30, 2008 10:10 pm
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Posted: Thu Oct 02, 2008 12:45 pm
A guy was driving when a policeman pulled him over. He rolled down his window and said to the officer, "Is there a problem, Officer?"
"No problem at all. I just observed your safe driving and am pleased to award you a $5,000 Safe Driver Award. Congratulations. What do you think you're going to do with the money?"
He thought for a minute and said, "Well, I guess I'll go get that drivers' license."
The lady sitting in the passenger seat said to the policeman, "Oh, don't pay attention to him - he's such a smartass when he's drunk and stoned."
The guy from the back seat said, "I TOLD you guys we wouldn't get far in a stolen car!"
At that moment, there was a knock from the trunk and a muffled voice said, "Are we over the border yet?"
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Posted: Fri Oct 03, 2008 12:33 am
Wicked Feenix A guy was driving when a policeman pulled him over. He rolled down his window and said to the officer, "Is there a problem, Officer?"
"No problem at all. I just observed your safe driving and am pleased to award you a $5,000 Safe Driver Award. Congratulations. What do you think you're going to do with the money?"
He thought for a minute and said, "Well, I guess I'll go get that drivers' license."
The lady sitting in the passenger seat said to the policeman, "Oh, don't pay attention to him - he's such a smartass when he's drunk and stoned."
The guy from the back seat said, "I TOLD you guys we wouldn't get far in a stolen car!"
At that moment, there was a knock from the trunk and a muffled voice said, "Are we over the border yet?" lol wtf
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Posted: Mon Oct 06, 2008 2:25 pm
Wicked Feenix A guy was driving when a policeman pulled him over. He rolled down his window and said to the officer, "Is there a problem, Officer?"
"No problem at all. I just observed your safe driving and am pleased to award you a $5,000 Safe Driver Award. Congratulations. What do you think you're going to do with the money?"
He thought for a minute and said, "Well, I guess I'll go get that drivers' license."
The lady sitting in the passenger seat said to the policeman, "Oh, don't pay attention to him - he's such a smartass when he's drunk and stoned."
The guy from the back seat said, "I TOLD you guys we wouldn't get far in a stolen car!"
At that moment, there was a knock from the trunk and a muffled voice said, "Are we over the border yet?" LOL! That is sure one hell of a messed up joke! But I laughed.........
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Posted: Mon Oct 06, 2008 2:28 pm
Johnny asks grandpa: "Do you still have sex with granny?"
Grandpa says: "Yes, but only oral."
Johnny asks: "What is oral?"
Grandpa says: "I say f*ck you, she says f*ck you, too."
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Posted: Tue Oct 07, 2008 1:46 am
Wicked Feenix A guy was driving when a policeman pulled him over. He rolled down his window and said to the officer, "Is there a problem, Officer?"
"No problem at all. I just observed your safe driving and am pleased to award you a $5,000 Safe Driver Award. Congratulations. What do you think you're going to do with the money?"
He thought for a minute and said, "Well, I guess I'll go get that drivers' license."
The lady sitting in the passenger seat said to the policeman, "Oh, don't pay attention to him - he's such a smartass when he's drunk and stoned."
The guy from the back seat said, "I TOLD you guys we wouldn't get far in a stolen car!"
At that moment, there was a knock from the trunk and a muffled voice said, "Are we over the border yet?" Kinda weird...but sort of funny.
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Posted: Tue Oct 07, 2008 6:16 am
18luck Johnny asks grandpa: "Do you still have sex with granny?" Grandpa says: "Yes, but only oral." Johnny asks: "What is oral?" Grandpa says: "I say f*ck you, she says f*ck you, too." Wow. Harsh oral sex. lol
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Posted: Tue Nov 11, 2008 12:10 am
18luck Johnny asks grandpa: "Do you still have sex with granny?" Grandpa says: "Yes, but only oral." Johnny asks: "What is oral?" Grandpa says: "I say f*ck you, she says f*ck you, too." what a happy couple.
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Posted: Wed Feb 18, 2009 2:19 pm
ok this thread was dying... I'm going to post a funny REAL customer quote from http://notalwaysright.com/ smile You’re Only As Old As You Act Grocery Store | Phoenix, AZ, USA (An elderly woman well into her 70s comes through the check-out line with a single bottle of wine. I start to scan the bottle through.) Customer: “Wait! Aren’t you going to check my ID?” Me: “Er, no, ma’am, I don’t think it’s really necessary…” Customer: “Well, that’s no good! You should check all ID if you’re selling alcohol.” Me: “Well, okay. May I see your ID, please?” (She hands over an ID card that is obviously fake.) Me: “…ma’am, this card says you’re seventeen.” Customer: “Oh, dear! You’ve caught me! I’m much too young to be buying this! It’s a good thing you were checking IDs. I’d better just go now! *skips out the door* Me: “…”
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