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Posted: Thu Nov 23, 2006 10:49 am
Brian_Link Sora_963 Brian_Link Sora_963 I have to go. I did another mission.MISSION- Starting an Attack?! Someone has attacked the place where we get our starters. Your mission is to go and stop them. (You will run into 4 trainers) Pokemon: Carvanha Poochyena Zubat Funds upon completion: 800 _____________________________________________________________ Pass, better, but not perfect. But I pretty much said what I had problems with before. The describing the place is OK, but I want you to become better at describing you and what you do. Try to put in some more realism. Keep the 800 PD and you get a rank-up. Ok. I'll try to describe myself and what I am doing.*Sighs* Me: Don't forget to have actions in your posts. But I'm really trying to get at in the end is how you just list what you do. Listing makes the mission dull, not flavorful. Ok. So the end I need to improve more.Writes everything down on paper.
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Posted: Thu Nov 23, 2006 10:54 am
Watches the TV. Whoa. Chris Brown is singing in the parade. Keeps watching.
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Posted: Thu Nov 23, 2006 10:55 am
Sora_963 Brian_Link Sora_963 Brian_Link Sora_963 I have to go. I did another mission.MISSION- Starting an Attack?! Someone has attacked the place where we get our starters. Your mission is to go and stop them. (You will run into 4 trainers) Pokemon: Carvanha Poochyena Zubat Funds upon completion: 800 _____________________________________________________________ Pass, better, but not perfect. But I pretty much said what I had problems with before. The describing the place is OK, but I want you to become better at describing you and what you do. Try to put in some more realism. Keep the 800 PD and you get a rank-up. Ok. I'll try to describe myself and what I am doing.*Sighs* Me: Don't forget to have actions in your posts. But I'm really trying to get at in the end is how you just list what you do. Listing makes the mission dull, not flavorful. Ok. So the end I need to improve more.Writes everything down on paper. Me: No you misheard me. I meant is what thing about your missions is affecting me the most. Your conclusions are decent enough. Its your writing style that I have trouble with. Its list like and choppy.
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Posted: Thu Nov 23, 2006 11:00 am
Brian_Link Sora_963 Brian_Link Sora_963 Brian_Link Sora_963 I have to go. I did another mission.MISSION- Starting an Attack?! Someone has attacked the place where we get our starters. Your mission is to go and stop them. (You will run into 4 trainers) Pokemon: Carvanha Poochyena Zubat Funds upon completion: 800 _____________________________________________________________ Pass, better, but not perfect. But I pretty much said what I had problems with before. The describing the place is OK, but I want you to become better at describing you and what you do. Try to put in some more realism. Keep the 800 PD and you get a rank-up. Ok. I'll try to describe myself and what I am doing.*Sighs* Me: Don't forget to have actions in your posts. But I'm really trying to get at in the end is how you just list what you do. Listing makes the mission dull, not flavorful. Ok. So the end I need to improve more.Writes everything down on paper. Me: No you misheard me. I meant is what thing about your missions is affecting me the most. Your conclusions are decent enough. Its your writing style that I have trouble with. Its list like and choppy. So I need to stop making a list like mission?
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Posted: Thu Nov 23, 2006 11:03 am
Sora_963 Brian_Link Sora_963 Brian_Link Sora_963 Ok. I'll try to describe myself and what I am doing. *Sighs* Me: Don't forget to have actions in your posts. But I'm really trying to get at in the end is how you just list what you do. Listing makes the mission dull, not flavorful. Ok. So the end I need to improve more.Writes everything down on paper. Me: No you misheard me. I meant is what thing about your missions is affecting me the most. Your conclusions are decent enough. Its your writing style that I have trouble with. Its list like and choppy. So I need to stop making a list like mission?Me: Pretty much. *Furret looks around a corner*
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Posted: Thu Nov 23, 2006 11:04 am
Brian_Link Sora_963 Brian_Link Sora_963 Brian_Link Sora_963 Ok. I'll try to describe myself and what I am doing. *Sighs* Me: Don't forget to have actions in your posts. But I'm really trying to get at in the end is how you just list what you do. Listing makes the mission dull, not flavorful. Ok. So the end I need to improve more.Writes everything down on paper. Me: No you misheard me. I meant is what thing about your missions is affecting me the most. Your conclusions are decent enough. Its your writing style that I have trouble with. Its list like and choppy. So I need to stop making a list like mission?Me: Pretty much. *Furret looks around a corner* Ok.Looks at the TV.
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Posted: Thu Nov 23, 2006 11:10 am
Furret!I like furrets. *looks at furret*
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Posted: Thu Nov 23, 2006 11:11 am
Sees SL. Hey SL. Looks at the TV. I saw the Pikachu balloon again and a pokeball infront of it.
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Posted: Thu Nov 23, 2006 11:12 am
I'm gonna wait till its darker to finish this mission. Puts laptop away*
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Posted: Thu Nov 23, 2006 11:17 am
squirtlelover101 Furret!I like furrets. *looks at furret* *Furret goes up and sniffs your hand, and then climbs onto your shoulders* Me: Yeah Furret just has a grudge against anything that she considers Spam. So you should be fine.
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Posted: Thu Nov 23, 2006 11:20 am
*Yuki climbs on one shoulder* Yuki: What is this thing? *pokes furret* stop that! *Yuki gets slapped in the face by SL* Yuki:....@_@....ow
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Posted: Thu Nov 23, 2006 11:28 am
Me: Well I got my own Thanksgiving celebration to go to. Aerodactyl, come on out. *Aerodactyl comes out of her PokéBall* Me: To Mauville. *I fly off to Mauville*
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Posted: Thu Nov 23, 2006 11:30 am
Cya,I'm gonna play on my Fire red version. *waves and goes into her room*
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Posted: Thu Nov 23, 2006 11:44 am
Brian_Link Me: Well I got my own Thanksgiving celebration to go to. Aerodactyl, come on out. *Aerodactyl comes out of her PokéBall* Me: To Mauville. *I fly off to Mauville* Remembers about something. Speaking about own Thanksgiving, I have a party at my house. I better go to the Ship CK. *Stands for Ship Cruiser Kanto.* Well. I'll be back some other time later. Bye.Turns off the TV and leaves to the ship.
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Posted: Thu Nov 23, 2006 11:50 am
Comes back in Aqua Base. I forgot something. Goes to get his pokeballs and then leaves.
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