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 Posted: Sat Mar 12, 2011 3:38 pm
I just realized that the antique shop EI released 3 entire evolutions at once to end it. I guess that means that EI's might actually be 100% complete when they are initially released – which only serves to be more irritating when you wait 5 months for an evolution while they pump out RIGs.
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Posted: Sat Mar 12, 2011 5:07 pm
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frill-necked_Lizard
I must get one of these!
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Posted: Sat Mar 12, 2011 6:06 pm
Lamb of God27 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frill-necked_Lizard I must get one of these! If you do, I would advise you to get a large enclosure and set it up a fair time before you get the lizard. They are actually pretty hardy and can make good pets, but temperature and humidity are really critical – so you want to have an enclosure that you know absolutely will maintain a proper balance to avoid it from getting ill, especially young ones.
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Posted: Sun Mar 13, 2011 7:41 pm
I apologize for not being around much the last few days. I recently got the new Dragon Age 2 and a lot of my free time is being sucked into playing. razz
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Posted: Mon Mar 14, 2011 7:05 am
Camwen I apologize for not being around much the last few days. I recently got the new Dragon Age 2 and a lot of my free time is being sucked into playing. razz I plan on getting it... just for PC though hehe
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Posted: Mon Mar 14, 2011 9:57 am
This song made my day. Gay Fish few bad words.. so watch out if little ones are around.. but I can not stop laughing! xd xd
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Posted: Tue Mar 15, 2011 1:47 pm
Lamb of God27 Camwen I apologize for not being around much the last few days. I recently got the new Dragon Age 2 and a lot of my free time is being sucked into playing. razz I plan on getting it... just for PC though hehe ok I finished it... I know it's got mixed reviews and I can really see why it wouldn't appeal to those who prefer FPS and yes it's different from the first... ok I'm babbling... anyway... those bastards! They make you care about the different characters in game and then it all goes to hell. *falls over* .... someone please pour me a stiff drink..
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Posted: Tue Mar 15, 2011 8:14 pm
- Face Palm - At this months MC's
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Posted: Wed Mar 16, 2011 2:09 pm
Lamb of God27 - Face Palm - At this months MC's *Joins in facepalm* Those things fail on so many levels.
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Posted: Thu Mar 17, 2011 8:25 am
I kind of like the gold thingie, but I'm not into the gold stuff anymore. And it's not even really that special. I miss when the MC were epic and had amajillion poses. stare
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Posted: Thu Mar 17, 2011 11:47 am
Kujujuwa I kind of like the gold thingie, but I'm not into the gold stuff anymore. And it's not even really that special. I miss when the MC were epic and had amajillion poses. stare And when a $10 EI would have 5 rows of stuff, not 1.5.
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Posted: Fri Mar 18, 2011 10:58 pm
Well, it has been a day.
Last night, my state slumped quite a bit and I started getting really ******** up. With nothing to do otherwise, I decided to try to sleep. Which then turned into a bloody nose fest. So maybe 1.5 hours sleep in all, between bouts of bloody noses and neck-tweak pains, I get up this morning to stress from my parents.
And with not enough blood and the stress, my heart is laboring. So I decide, as stupidity is wont to do, sort books and pack books. The dust, the strain, the feelings of dread and self-loathing that I do not deserve anything, et cetera just started snowballing...
And I had a meltdown severe enough that my mother almost took me to the hospital. Apparently she thought I was having an over half hour seizure. I just remember a throbbing heart noise, sporadic sight, and my mind going a thousand miles per hour in directions I do not want it to go. After I started into the autistic kid rocking, I realized that I was drenched in sweat, which due to the dust also meant I was drenched in dirt, and meltdown two started.
I am stable now at least. I am stronger, but things are getting difficult. So it is hard for me to say how better I am. I would probably say that if I was mobile, I would be in the hospital for doing something stupid. Not even suicidal, literally numb self-destruction. But I feel like I am somewhat in control now. When I start panicking, I am able to stamp it down a bit -- but it is kind of 20 steps toward meltdown, 19 back. So it's still building and difficult.
I am feeling like I am having a crisis. Suffocating under the pressure of all these things, thoughts and relations and objects all feeling immensely like weight pressing down. And when you feel like your books are something you do not deserve and are suffocating and owning you but they have been so important for so long - you freak.
Enough of my rambling. *Trudges into the canteen's freezer and requisitions a 2.5 gallon tub of ice cream -- noshing away with a large, cooking spoon.*
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Posted: Sat Mar 19, 2011 5:10 am
Exxos I am sorry you have it so hard:/ I never experienced anything like this... I panicked as soon as I noticed I am having tiny meltdowns (really tiny compared to yours) and went to the doctor. Now Im drinking some meds for more than a year that calm me down so I dont have such crazy mood swings as before. I am really happy and grateful (to anyone or anything out there, and to the doctor) that the first meds I tried started working:/
I really wish I could give some advice or help, but unfortunately only thing I can say is that... we love you here heart
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Posted: Sat Mar 19, 2011 11:05 am
((((((Exxos))))))) As much as I wish in my heart that I could wave a wand and make all of your troubles disappear... I know all I can do is send my good thoughts, provide a listening ear, and as much virtual ice cream as you can stand. You are truly a good person and I am lucky to know you.  
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Posted: Sun Mar 20, 2011 12:58 am
I wish there was a pill or something I could take. But my body metabolizes them poorly on top of it not being wholly chemical. Basically I need a depressant and anti-depressant for two problems so they cancel each other out and then there is just that a lot of it is not a chemical imbalance but problems in life and in psychology.
I slept through most of the night. I had some tossing, turning, and bad dreams. Though considering my day yesterday, that is no real surprise. The dreams were sporadic and did not help matters much. Reliving episodes in my life that I may assume are connected to my psychological state. I wake up and try to see meaning in it. Not from a new age way, but kind of like, "I spotted this file being put back into storage, why was it out in the first place?"
One being that my father was on my case over things I had and did not deserve and was yelling at me about it, yelling turned to hitting, and I ended up on the steps down from the living room into the kitchen, crying and hurt as he went on and on. I remember trying to fight back and that made it worse. I was then knocked down and slammed my head on the floor – which was vinyl over concrete, so hard as hell – and he went into more of a tirade and ended up kicking and slamming me. I was probably 12 at the time.
And remembering that brought some clarity as to the things I was thinking and remembering during my meltdown yesterday – a whole lot of incidents of my father on my case about things I had.
So it got me thinking, and you can weigh in on this idea, that what happened is something two pronged. First, I am in a bit of a quarter-life crisis and not happy with where I am – feeling trapped and unsure of how to get somewhere good. Secondly, packing books, like packing anything, is like moving and like locking away things, it causes me a lot of stress. I think of what I have and have this built up repetition of how I should have nothing, need nothing, everything wasted on me from my father, and it starts forming a psychological thing. And then the dust is just that I have always hated dust. Literally, 2 years old, dust would upset me when my things got covered with it. So I think that that is not as much a factor in the break down in itself, but did add its effect into it all. I've been living out of boxes for about half my life now. When I see boxes, I think moving and closing off and discomfort. Even just subconsciously. And I wonder how, if I ever got somewhere I could unpack and live, I would put any of this stuff anywhere without it being caked with dust and reminding me that it was money wasted.
Sorry for venting more of my drama. But at least I am a lot more stable and better today than yesterday.
*usurps control over the cookies'n'cream range.*
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