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Posted: Mon Jun 26, 2006 11:51 pm
It's good Miri. ^_^ Nice dialogue.
*smashes LimeWire* Why are my songs all queued and not having any other status?! crying Shouldn't at least one of them say Connecting or Needs More Sources? gonk
*writes in my notebook*
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Posted: Mon Jun 26, 2006 11:53 pm
LadyD: heart Hi heart
Taylor: *huggles back* Yeah, it's kinda hard to catch me 'cause it's not like I have a lot of time for the computer anymore and I just kinda sneak on for a few minutes when I can. Kiddos keep me pretty busy! How are you doing?
Alex: Magical?
Miri: That's okay. She's still here and still a baby, though she's growing up fast. We took her in to her two month check up and she's already twenty-four and one eigth inches tall and thirteen lbs six ozs (95th percentile-she's big xd heart )
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Posted: Mon Jun 26, 2006 11:54 pm
^_^ I'm doing okay...trying to get back into my writing. I went to Disneyland two weeks ago too. ^_^
I hope everything's good for you too. 3nodding How are the little ones?
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Posted: Mon Jun 26, 2006 11:55 pm
Anywho, LadyD's going to bed.
Nightnight! heart
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Posted: Mon Jun 26, 2006 11:56 pm
Better not talk about babies, or I'll start wanting one again... >_>
*Trying to make it to at least 25 without getting preggies...*
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Posted: Mon Jun 26, 2006 11:58 pm
Night LadyD heart Pleasant dreams.
Miri: Okay, I'll try to remember no baby talk when I see you online wink So may I ask why you were gone for so long?
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Posted: Mon Jun 26, 2006 11:58 pm
*feels like adding to the writing fun*
Here's what I just wrote:Part from Marco's Assassins Taylor had fallen asleep, but Jack was still wide awake. He sat on the bed, his back to Taylor. He was fully dressed, and was thinking about how good life was right now. He got up and went into the kitchen downstairs. Taylor didn't know but he had bought some of that Gojan beer he had spoken of. It was hidden behind the soda in the fridge. He took one out and popped the bottlecap off, and drank away. He had downed about a half of the bottle in a matter of seconds. He gasped with relief and freshness after his little drink. "What delicious beer." he said with a smile. CLUNK. He swerved and looked at the house. A vase had been gently knocked over. "What the?" He walked over and inspected it. "Okay...somethin's goin' on here-" He turned, only to get clobbered in the head by a blunt object. He was knocked unconscious... sweatdrop Probably doesn't make too much sense...since it's a good way into the story already. ^_^
Basically...Jack just got captured.
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Posted: Mon Jun 26, 2006 11:59 pm
Jen: Aye, magical. In PHP OOP, functions with a prefix of __ are usually considered "magical" in such that they perform extra tasks on whatever code you've included into the function. xD
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Posted: Tue Jun 27, 2006 12:03 am
It was mostly me being overloaded with schoolwork and very, very important video games that had to be played. But yeah, term papers upon term papers. A lot of traveling, too.
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Posted: Tue Jun 27, 2006 12:05 am
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Posted: Tue Jun 27, 2006 12:05 am
Alex: *nods, ruffles your hair, and heads off* The toddler's got a stinky diaper and the baby wants to eat again. I've got to head *leaves luffs*
Miri: School work can get pretty overwhelming. It was good to see you again.
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Posted: Tue Jun 27, 2006 12:06 am
Taylor: Being totally honest and hoping to be helpful, the "What delicious beer." line seems to be an akward thing for someone to say to themselves. An "mmm..." or "Delicious!" would fit better, I think.
Also, was the vase dropping an intentional distraction, or clumsyness on the attacker's part?
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Posted: Tue Jun 27, 2006 12:07 am
I'm not so sure yet...but probably a distraction. Jack can be caught very vulnerable at times... sweatdrop Unless it was the Rogue...he's clumsy. sweatdrop
Good idea...that line does sound...weird now that I think about it.
*wishes LimeWire would download my music* gonk crying
EDIT: How does "Damn that's good" sound for the beer thing? xd
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Posted: Tue Jun 27, 2006 12:12 am
That works.
If you're ever stuck on a line (and alone), try saying the line out loud to see how well it flows.
In fact, the best way to edit lines and correct errors is to read your story out loud. Since it has to go from your eyes to your mouth, instead of from your eyes to your brain, it goes through more checkpoints and helps you catch things you wouldn't have noticed otherwise.
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Posted: Tue Jun 27, 2006 12:16 am
^_^ I've done that SO many times with other stories...mostly just to hear how well I can do Antell's voice...but for those it all sounds good.
This story's almsot starting from scratch. gonk Only because the previous ones (with Cid) were short and dumb...so I took them, changed them, and combined them into one, where Marco basically just hires assassins to kill Jack (Jack accidentally killed his best friend but Christina deviously made Marco believe that it was murder...). sweatdrop
Hm...I might go through my story again later to get out all the flukes. Good idea Miri. Thanks. ^_^
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