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 Posted: Sun Sep 25, 2011 7:26 pm
Aww... :c Hope everything works out for you Sil.
Maeko, Happy effin' Birthday! :3 Enjoy being 18, it's all downhill from there. Kidding. xD
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Posted: Mon Sep 26, 2011 11:29 am
Its fine, Maria. I've got really bad depression and anxiety issues, and since my last break down a couple years ago, I've been hiding it ...a lot. It'd show up every once in a while, but not like it did the other night. I got in a really horrible fight with my girlfriend and all of it came out.
In short - Tanya made a suicide threat because she couldn't handle the stress of the depression and anxiety anymore, and she needed desperate help. And then it got worse because I was terrified people were going to think I was just acting that way for attention...
And it got pretty bad.
Everything got resolved with my girlfriend. We're okay now. I'm still pretty down though. For some reason its just not as easy to bounce back up, or at least mask it, as it normally is. Mom wants me to see a therapist. I really scared her the other night, and she's really concerned about me. I feel really -really- shitty for that.
So. ..Yeah. Just explaining what that message was about.
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Posted: Mon Sep 26, 2011 1:27 pm
S'cuse me while I go sit over here and convince myself that I don't want to ragequit.
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Posted: Mon Sep 26, 2011 2:55 pm
>: I've never been to a therapist, but sometimes having just someone there that you can just tell everything or anything is really good for you.
I don't talk to my friends or family about my problems.
I actually went to my youth group pastor at one point in my life. [[No, I wasn't confessing some sort of sin... but some other things.]]
Try to find someone that you know you can trust.
I'll tell you the truth, I don't trust my friends or my family to help me do what's right.
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Posted: Mon Sep 26, 2011 3:03 pm
I'm sorry to hear you're going through such a rough time, Sil, I hope things even out soon. :c && To be honest, there's nothing wrong with therapy, it can be really helpful, but Card's right, you could also just voice your emotions with a person you care about and trust.
&& Thank you, Maria. c:
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Posted: Mon Sep 26, 2011 3:25 pm
That's the thing. I do vent out. I do it a lot, actually.
Maybe its not doing enough because I've been venting to them for years.
I am not seeing a psychiatrist though. I do not want to risk someone pushing anti-depressants on me as a "quick fix".
I've done anti-depressants before. Never. Again. I didn't feel -anything-. I was practically emotionless. And as much as I might hate my emotions sometimes, nothing is as bad as the feeling of not having them.
And its also the problem of finding one I can trust in the area. I'm in a very Christian conservative area. I have to be careful to make sure they don't just ignore my real problems to try to "fix" my bisexuality. Because I've had a lot of friends around here have that exact same problem with therapists.
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Posted: Mon Sep 26, 2011 6:28 pm
Maybe I'm too comfortable with the internet, but I sometime ask my online friend to lend an ear whenever I feel very down (it's a rare thing actually). Sure, I feel very bad when I tell them how I feel and all that (it's a part of being a shamed of oneself), but I believe it's a step in the right direction (online, or irl). Everyone needs help at some points in their lives.
*ponders for a bit* If it's mainly the community you're in that's affecting your emotions, maybe working toward having a new house would help? Or would that be considered as running away? Sometimes going to a new environment helps people think much more clearly though...
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Posted: Mon Sep 26, 2011 6:40 pm
....Therapists seriously just give anti-depressants like pez candy? I thought that was a myth...
And I'm rather iffy about going to therapists myself. I mean, I didn't know my Youth Group Pastor [oh, for God's sakes, I'm just going to call him by his name, Bryan, from now on] very well, but he's the sort of person you know you can trust, ya' know?
And I don't think running away'll help... Though, perhaps a small 'vacation' would be good. Even if it's just a sit down with someone and having a real talk.
I mean like a real good talk... Like the sort you only have once every fifteen years or something.
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Posted: Mon Sep 26, 2011 7:31 pm
Therapists can't prescribe anti-depressants. They can refer you to a psychiatrist who can though. Only psychiatrists and doctors with an MD in mental health can. I was ..probably fifteen or sixteen when I saw a psychiatrist. I mentioned that I might be having depression issues. He just gave me a prescription.
Now, it could just be that particular one, but damn, it kind of gave me a bad impression.
And getting away isn't the issue. I've taken vacations. I've gone on breaks. It doesn't ever really help, to be honest. (And I am moving in with my girlfriend after school is over. But that's a couple of year's off.; )
I dunno. Maybe I'm being bitter at the moment. My emotions are all kjsdfthd at the moment anyways. So.
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Posted: Mon Sep 26, 2011 8:04 pm
Okay, so I have some experience with these things. 1) My Ma is a psychiatrist. 2) I've been to therapists.
First of all, like people, some psychiatrists just don't care about their patients and are willing to do just about anything to get their paycheck. I'm sorry Sil, but you just got one of the few who didn't really care. All of the ones I know are decent people who simply are about others and desire to help them face their fears and become the best person they can be.
Some people just suck, but if you go to a clinic that has a better reputation, chances are you'll meet one of the better ones.
Now, on to therapists. I like them. They're nice and they genuinely want to help you. I've been to several and they've helped me to realize and face the majority of my issues. It may help to talk to an unbiased person to see if you can figure out your life without the help of any medications.
Besides, an awesome thing about willing going to psychiatrists and/or therapists before you have a nervous breakdown is that you can stop seeing them at any point and find a new one until you find a good fit.
Also, if you're worried about the conservative thing, have you tried the more government run ones? I'm sure you'll find a few that aren't just trying to 'fix' you.
Suicide isn't something to be taken lightly and if you aren't seeing someone right now, you should either get professional help or you should call a suicide hotline for support.
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Posted: Mon Sep 26, 2011 9:18 pm
Oh wow, thanks for that response. It helps a lot.
I'm looking into some myself. My doctor was the one who refereed me to the psychiatrist a few years back, so I kind of have no clue what in the world I'm looking for. Any advice on that? I also have to consider what my insurance will cover.
On a different note (sorry everything got all super serious around here, guys.) I recorded myself singing one of the new songs from tonight's Adventure Time episode. Its got mistakes, but overall, its not bad. I dunno if I should share it though. I'm kind of self conscious about my singing.
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Posted: Mon Sep 26, 2011 9:54 pm
Screw it. Not gonna hurt anything to post it. Here. Have some Tanya singing.
So. I've got a ton of s**t I need to get done around here, guys. XD I'll get to that here in a moment. I'm still in need of questions and stuff for the two Loyal candidates. Send those to me via PM, if you please.~
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Posted: Wed Sep 28, 2011 5:09 pm
Silent Cartoon Screw it. Not gonna hurt anything to post it. Here. Have some Tanya singing.
So. I've got a ton of s**t I need to get done around here, guys. XD I'll get to that here in a moment. I'm still in need of questions and stuff for the two Loyal candidates. Send those to me via PM, if you please.~
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Posted: Wed Sep 28, 2011 7:15 pm
Pure. Adorable. Flutterfluff.
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Posted: Wed Sep 28, 2011 7:39 pm
heart I love the world. Just putting that out first.
I wake up in the morning, about to get ready for school... Find out it's Typhoon 8 and there's no school. 8D
HELL TO THE YESSS~
Now I'm singing Schadenfreude at the top of my lungs and annoying my sister. THIS IS A GOOD DAY.
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