Telemarketers

[Aristaline]

(Telemarketer calls selling nobel prize...)

"Are you guys immortal? I just killed you all, so you give me a nobel prize?! You are the most idiotc fool I have ever talkin to, you are going down!!!" Throws brand newphone against wall so it shatteres to.

(Telemarketer calls selling you and everlasting gobstopper.... {from charlie and the chocolate factorie})  

[Mr Sternums]

(What ^ said)

What? I don't want any candy. It's not even everlasting!

(Telemarketer calls selling Earth...)  

[Aristaline]

(What ^ said)

"You cant sell me something I already own..... " Glares at people.

(Telemarketers call selling... a peanut straw...)  

[The Kingdom Keeper]

(Telemarketers call selling... a peanut straw...)

Really? A peanut... hold on one second...

*walks to door of room*
*yells, "You stupid little brat get back in that room! Don't you make me get the whip!!!*
*walks back to phone*
Sorry bout that...
...
...
...Hello?
lol, works every time!

(Telemarketers call selling something useful for once...)  

[Parisian Loafer]

(What he said.)

I've got so much 'useful' JUNK you've already sold me that I think I may need a second house.

(Telemarketer calls selling Cher's Greatest Hits)  

[The Kingdom Keeper]

(Telemarketer calls selling Cher's Greatest Hits)

I already own it. *hangs up*

(Calls selling free gold)  

[Parisian Loafer]

(Telemarketer calls selling free gold)

Lemme guess... the catch is that I have to sign 52 forms with print so small it can't be read by an insect, pay you a monetary amount way too expensive for me to afford right now, juggle five hyper monkeys, and do the chicken dance in front of national television. No? Just basic cable?
stare
Well, SCREW YOU.

(Telemarketer calls selling watches)  

[The Kingdom Keeper]

(Telemarketer calls selling watches)

I'm father time for crying out loud!
I ALREADY KNOW WHAT TIME IT IS!
I AM TIME!!!

(telemarketer calls selling the usual)  

[Parisian Loafer]

NO. :slams phone on reciever:


:telemarketer calls selling vintage comic books:  

[Scarlett Syn]

Vintage? Does that mean it's starting to turn moldy? Mold! I want moooold! GIMME MY GOLDARNG MOLD I SAY!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Telemarketer sells hair extensions...)  

[Milk the Strange]

I have hair down to my butt! Don't call me again.
:telemarketer calls selling "Paper Folding for Dummies":  

[Scarlett Syn]

*lets out a blood-curdling scream and hangs up*

Telemarketer sells rechargeable nose-hair trimmer.  

[Arachnakid]

(Telemarketer sells rechargeable nose-hair trimmer.)

Dude...why are you using the phone? The aliens can control your brain with the phone, it gets stronger every time you use it...do you want to be a slave to some green dude?


(Telemarketer calls selling adorable chicken plushies for your avatar...)  

[kitamoo]

where did you get chicken plushies?

*telemarketer calls to sell spleen*  

[Parisian Loafer]

Spleen...
SPLEEN...
SPLEEEN!!!

(Telemarketer calls selling tube socks)