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 Posted: Sat Mar 05, 2005 1:57 pm
I feel so stupid...
I haven't really slept since I woke up wednesday morning, I've had things to do and I barely had more than a few hours at a time to myself. I tried to sleep but knowing that I would just have to get up again in a couple hours makes it hard for me.
Anyway, I went to my girlfriend's house today... and I fell asleep... She didn't seem pissed though, if she was she either hid it very well or she got it all out of her system before she woke me up and told me to go home to my own bed... where I should probably be right now... so very tired...
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Posted: Sat Mar 05, 2005 3:17 pm
crape1 I feel so stupid... I haven't really slept since I woke up wednesday morning, I've had things to do and I barely had more than a few hours at a time to myself. I tried to sleep but knowing that I would just have to get up again in a couple hours makes it hard for me. Anyway, I went to my girlfriend's house today... and I fell asleep... She didn't seem pissed though, if she was she either hid it very well or she got it all out of her system before she woke me up and told me to go home to my own bed... where I should probably be right now... so very tired...
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Posted: Sat Mar 05, 2005 3:51 pm
Chalda Aww it's ok. That really shouldn't be that big a deal unless you are doing it every time you go over or something. Try not to worry so much. If you have confidence in your relationship then it's much more likely to do well. Nah, I think she understands since she's part of the reason I haven't had time to sleep (Look at me complaining about my lack of sleep but still sitting in front of the computer...), I just feel bad because I fell asleep on her... well, not literally, but you know what I mean. On the bright side I probably make better company when I'm not doing anything. Confidence in the relationship... well that's a different problem altogether. I haven't been with a girl for longer than a month in almost three years (I guess I don't have any standards) so I'm kinda paranoid about everything. If this lasts even only one day after after the one month mark I'll be happy. In all honesty I'm not expecting it to last though, we're too different.
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Posted: Sat Mar 05, 2005 9:14 pm
Upset, angry and falling apart. My life on both Gaia and real life are just hectic. I am tired, and my eyes are killing me. I do not really feel like being on, but there is one person I have to talk to, cus chances are I will finally get to see him for the first time in a year during Easter. I can't wait. Now let's just hope the military will send him home.
Emotionally I am just stressed out. I am tired of the fighting in both places. I am tired of the arguements on who is more "elite" on here. Who deserves this, and who deserves that, and who doesn't. Why the ******** does how many reports you make a day, how often you post, any of that bullshit ******** matter? IT DOESN'T!!! THAT IS THE WHOLE POINT!! TRUST ME I KNOW!! I ASKED A ******** ADMIN!! Now just ******** get over it, and yourself if you think that counting everything and changing everything makes you that more special, because it ******** doesn't. This goes to everyone thinking that.
Real life, HAH where to begin with that. How is it that the moment I am used to not having someone in my life they come back? They decide they miss their old best friend and would love to have her back. That makes not a lick of damn sense to me. I just don't get it. And it is harder than hell to say no, but I can't say yes. And so I am dealing with so many devils on my shoulders and trying to ignore them, but some days they are just more appealing than the angels. I'm stuck in a darkness I can't get my way out of, and all it is doing is leading me down into the depths of a major depression.
3 months, and it will be six years. Six years...time ******** flies. I can't freaking believe that six years ago I would have been so much more different. I can't believe that I had that air of innocence that I just had stolen from me. I should have known it was starting when I started to get nightmares again. Ya think I would be able to control it all by now and not let it get under my skin..Heh, so wrong. You just never know when it will hit you, and when you will start to feel that old scary feeling. That feeling that creeps along your skin, makes you shudder and want to scratch it all off because all of a sudden you feel as if you are not pure enough, not good enough for anyone to even look at.
Life is just s**t. sweatdrop
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Posted: Sat Mar 05, 2005 10:53 pm
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Posted: Sun Mar 06, 2005 12:18 am
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Posted: Sun Mar 06, 2005 12:47 am
Giving people space right now. I probably can't help them, and I have hardly talked to them at all in almost two days. I'll just have to be patient.
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Posted: Sun Mar 06, 2005 1:31 am
Hmm, I am tired. I spent all last night talking to Mike, and a few hours talking to Kupi tonight. I'll be surprised if I have any minutes left on my phone.
And soon, I sleep. I'll probably end up IMing from my phone.
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Leviticus can shove it Vice Captain
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Posted: Sun Mar 06, 2005 4:11 am
Leviticus can shove it Hmm, I am tired. I spent all last night talking to Mike, and a few hours talking to Kupi tonight. I'll be surprised if I have any minutes left on my phone. And soon, I sleep. I'll probably end up IMing from my phone. Mike is kage, right? Wow, so that's really true...? You guys are...? girl-dan is going nuts about it... I tell her constantly that just because I listen doesn't mean I care about her problems (very nice of me, no?) and she still tries to treat me like her therapist. She's "in love" with him... She's just a lonely kid who wants to feel loved so when someone says a few nice things to her she developes a crush. I tried explaining that to her but then she gets with the "I've never felt like this about anyone before" and "He said he loved me!" I think she's starting to understand everything a little better now but she doesn't know how to deal with anything... emo kid... gah... I shouldn't be talking like this, I doubt she wanted me telling everyone... On a side note, I finally got a full night sleep... but I missed most of toonami and all of Adult Swim so I'm not sure it was worth it... ~~Edited because I didn't like the way the first part looked.
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Posted: Sun Mar 06, 2005 9:44 am
Yeah. I heard she was freaking a little. She's still on my MSN IM list, but she hasn't IMed me about it yet. I'm a leeeetle nervous about that. The LAST thing I need right now is a suicidal Danielle, anyways. I hope she can understand and move on, eventually anyways. stressed gonk
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Leviticus can shove it Vice Captain
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Posted: Sun Mar 06, 2005 10:32 am
crape1 Leviticus can shove it Hmm, I am tired. I spent all last night talking to Mike, and a few hours talking to Kupi tonight. I'll be surprised if I have any minutes left on my phone. And soon, I sleep. I'll probably end up IMing from my phone. Mike is kage, right? Wow, so that's really true...? You guys are...? girl-dan is going nuts about it... I tell her constantly that just because I listen doesn't mean I care about her problems (very nice of me, no?) and she still tries to treat me like her therapist. She's "in love" with him... She's just a lonely kid who wants to feel loved so when someone says a few nice things to her she developes a crush. I tried explaining that to her but then she gets with the "I've never felt like this about anyone before" and "He said he loved me!" I think she's starting to understand everything a little better now but she doesn't know how to deal with anything... emo kid... gah... I shouldn't be talking like this, I doubt she wanted me telling everyone... On a side note, I finally got a full night sleep... but I missed most of toonami and all of Adult Swim so I'm not sure it was worth it... ~~Edited because I didn't like the way the first part looked. Toonami can be forgiven. Adult Swim, no. But HAH, girl-dan makes my life funnier. We talked some, last night, and she tried to make me care about her puny problems, but no. Just no.
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Posted: Sun Mar 06, 2005 10:33 am
If you get the reference, it's exactly how I've been feeling the last few days.
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Posted: Sun Mar 06, 2005 1:35 pm
Oh man, I'm a sad, sad man. I just got Bohemian Rhapsody for my cell phone ($2). No one will ever call me, though. That's the sad part.
And I've still got that "Itchy... Tasty...." feeling. It's odd.
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Posted: Sun Mar 06, 2005 3:11 pm
Veit Loderr Oh man, I'm a sad, sad man. I just got Bohemian Rhapsody for my cell phone ($2). No one will ever call me, though. That's the sad part. And I've still got that "Itchy... Tasty...." feeling. It's odd.
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Posted: Sun Mar 06, 2005 3:14 pm
xLaurelX Veit Loderr Oh man, I'm a sad, sad man. I just got Bohemian Rhapsody for my cell phone ($2). No one will ever call me, though. That's the sad part. And I've still got that "Itchy... Tasty...." feeling. It's odd. Whoo! That'll make TWO calls for meee! I should sign up for the text messaging... does anyone know how much that costs?
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