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 Posted: Mon Oct 29, 2012 12:00 pm
For a moment, Jerry gave in, sighing against her touches. He had wanted this for so long, wanted this intimacy with her....
The old Sasha was dead. But Sasha was not dead. He refused to believe.... "It's... it's NOT that simple." He finally gasped, pulling back from his own reciprocating kisses.
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Posted: Mon Oct 29, 2012 12:12 pm
Sasha was torn between lying to him, telling him everything he wanted to hear just so she could get what she wanted - or slapping him across the face and marching out of his room in search of someone else that would give her what she wanted. She was not in the mood to seduce, to sweet-talk. She wasn't even sure if she knew how. Sasha's intimate experience was limited to the naked man that stood before her - and that was it.
She found herself getting angry. Angrier?
In the end, the anger won out.
"Fine," Sasha seethed, relinquishing her hold on him so that she could turn and snatch up her shirt. "Fine. You aren't the only man on this island. I wanted it to be you, but you're lost in some stupid silly fairy tale. Fine."
She slipped her arms into the blouse, fingers trembling with her rage. The sooner she got out of this stupid room, the better.
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Posted: Mon Oct 29, 2012 12:37 pm
She wanted it to be him.
She wanted him.
"You're different now, Sasha," He murmured as she gathered her things, his expression sad, "But you aren't better. And the old you is not dead. I know she's still in there. The person who cares for me. Who cares about being a good person. Letting go of that doesn't make you stronger. It makes you weaker. It makes you cowardly. And it makes you ugly. I don't want to be like that."
His head was swimming again. He was going to throw up or pass out or who knew. All he wanted was to just... lay quietly with her. Get some sleep, safe, together.
"If anyone will do to sate your needs, fine. Go. Get out of here. I don't want to waste my time on garbage." That said, he turned to finish his shower.
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Posted: Mon Oct 29, 2012 1:15 pm
Sasha didn't say a word. Her throat tightened and tightened with each word that he spoke. It wasn't a gentle emotion that made her feel like she wanted to choke. It wasn't a mourning of their relationship. It wasn't the impending threat of tears over the hurtful things he said.
It was a thick, sludge-like fury that filled her chest and clogged her throat. In that moment, she despised him. Garbage? Sasha was not garbage. She was not a coward.
She was not weak.
Inhale. Exhale. Calm.
He would pay for this.
Reassuring herself that her blouse was properly buttoned, Sasha slipped her shoes on. Without a word she let herself out of the room, chin held high despite the blood red rage that threatened to spill over.
She did not slam the door behind her, but closed it with a gentle click.
He would regret this.
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Posted: Mon Oct 29, 2012 1:22 pm
As she headed toward the door, he felt his voice rise up to call after her, "I still love you. And I still believe in you."
The door clicked shut.
Jerry watched her go, the tension leaving his shoulders as he sagged.
Quietly, he turned to get back into the shower.
Where he sat, and quietly sobbed.
Had he said the right thing? The wrong thing? He didn't know. He never did anything right. And now he was alone. Again. He let the water flow over him, burning in his wounds, the silence in his head ringing.
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