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I probably won't be able to afford one and stay stable in life untill I'm in my mid 20s

(Just letting you know I'm pondering it and trying to figure out how to answer. xp )

"I have something I need to tell you..." and then just tell them. You don't have to give them an explaination and don't bother with details until they ask. Now I don't know your parents and I don't know how they'll react but it would be a good idea to talk to a friend and see if you'd be able to stay with them for a couple of days, just incase it gets explosive.

If your parents explode then tell them that you understand it's a lot for them to process right now and you don't want anything to be said that could be hurtful and then tell them that you're going to go to a friend's for the night. Give them the phone number, address and name of the friend so that your parents can contact you if they want.

If they don't explode then just talk to them. They may cry and they may have lots of questions. Don't get mad at them for asking questions, if they ask something that you don't feel comfortable answering then just tell them that you don't feel comfortable answering it.



I assume from all of this that you wouldn't have an abortion unless your health was at risk. If I assume correctly tell this to the guy BEFORE you have sex, talk to him about the "what if's" that way if it does happen you can tell him and not have to worry about the "What do I do?" part while your mind is in a state of shock.

Once you have that down then don't spring it on him. If you think you might be pregnant tell him and tell him why you think that. If you're getting a pregnancy test than tell him. If you don't let on and then suddenly go "Oh and by the way, I'm pregnant." he will react a lot worse.



Look into adoption for your area and find out how it works. I would totally 100% recommend private adoption if adoption is what you choose. With private adoption YOU get to choose the parents your child will be brought up by. So if you don't want your kid being brought up by someone of a certain religion you can choose that. You have the option of meeting the potential adopters and you can even have an arrangement where you get to visit the child, or they'll send you pictures or you'll be invited to the big events etc.

You decide which path you'd rather take by firstly figuring out whether or not you can deal with someone else raising your child. Secondly you have to think what's better for the child. People often forget this one and raise their children in horrible conditions because they refuse to give them up.

But if you think you can raise you child in a good, safe environment I'd say go for it.


This is why you talk to him before hand and figure it all out before you have sex. That way everything is clear-cut and firm in your mind as to what will happen. Nothing will be a suprise that way.

Yeah, they'd so know what was coming from those words. Gotta love perseptive parents. Especially when they are only perseptive about certain things. Luckily I already know of at least three friends that would let me camp out. Hell all of them would also be ready to help me through all of this if need be.


And you would be correct. I'd only do that if my gyno or doctor was to tell me I was at risk (or if it was rape but that's not a situation here... I just know what a rape pregnancy does to me). That's probably what I would end up doing. Just as a brief random thing. And let him know that the risk does not deter me from the sex, just that if he doesn't want anything to do with it that's fine. I already got a preggers test (got it after I missed the period and last time I checked they have pretty good shelf lives. Plus if I was to get pregnant early on my gyno might pick it up at my annual exam thingy.


That's the only way I'd do it. I couldn't do an adoption center and then wonder if (s)he was adopted. I'd want to have someone there the whole way, and hopefully willing to at least help out the cost since it would end up being theirs. I wouldn't want a lot of visits because each time I'd leave I'd end up upset but I'd want to be able to see what happens to the child.

The only thing I worry about is money. I'm a uni student so money isn't the easiest thing to come by. And if I was to get pregnant and keep it I wouldn't be able to live on campus probably. And having not only a child but rent would be a problem. Outside of that I feel I'd be able to care for the child well enough.


Yup, makes sense.

Oh if anyone else has new advice I'm open for it. I think to much and the more fresh heads the better.

I'm 19 years old. A sophmore in a very pretigious yet not Ivy League school. I'm a bio major which means a very busy schedule and I'm pre-vet. Thing is despite all that if I was to get pregnant I would do whatever it took (if I kept it) to not only continue with school but give the child all the care it needed. The funny thing is that this came about for no reason at all. I wasn't even TALKING to the guy or really even thinking about sex (which is uncommon for me).

I'll be 20 in March. So I'm about a year older than you. *races off to the intro thread to find out exactly how much older* if you were born 8 days later I'd be exactly 1 year older.

Well, sounds like your parents arn't parents at all. No offence, but in my book, any parent that can say to their child "You" and "disowned" in the same sentince, no matter what the circumstrances (yes, even if its murder) have no right being parents. Thats just my opinoin

Don't follow them. What they preech is a danger to human integrity.