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 Posted: Fri Jul 06, 2007 10:29 pm
Tatsuman Sauvie Tatsuman Sauvie Tatsuman
Could use something on the eye, but still ownage.I'm Broke, I had 2000 to begin with xd Ah. Still, awesome I was going to buy the tophat and goggles but I am out of cash
As I said, ownage.Indeed... indeed it is
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Posted: Fri Jul 06, 2007 10:34 pm
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Posted: Fri Jul 06, 2007 10:42 pm
hellz ya brutha sry 4 levn u hanjn der man
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Posted: Fri Jul 06, 2007 10:44 pm
I feel empty.
It's like I'm alone.
My heart's been turned to stone.
So I hand it to you, baby~
"Together?"
You say maybe~
And then you turn.
And you drop it.
When you
see
him
again!
And my heart is broken!
I'm naught but a man!
So I pick up the pieces!
And I try to move on~
But it seems my Alexandra,
has now become Dawn.
Yeah, she's now become Dawn.
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Posted: Fri Jul 06, 2007 10:46 pm
Lavableman hellz ya brutha sry 4 levn u hanjn der man o iz ok mn i hukin up mai maispaes
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Posted: Fri Jul 06, 2007 10:46 pm
Meta_Fish I feel empty. It's like I'm alone. My heart's been turned to stone. So I hand it to you, baby~ " Together?" You say maybe~ And then you turn. And you drop it. When you see him again! And my heart is broken! I'm naught but a man! So I pick up the pieces! And I try to move on~ But it seems my Alexandra, has now become Dawn. Yeah, she's now become Dawn.
Not bad with the rhyming. Not much for poetry myself, though.
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Posted: Fri Jul 06, 2007 10:47 pm
Betman Lavableman hellz ya brutha sry 4 levn u hanjn der man o iz ok mn i hukin up mai maispaes dats tit! dats tit!
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Posted: Fri Jul 06, 2007 10:49 pm
Tatsuman Meta_Fish I feel empty. It's like I'm alone. My heart's been turned to stone. So I hand it to you, baby~ " Together?" You say maybe~ And then you turn. And you drop it. When you see him again! And my heart is broken! I'm naught but a man! So I pick up the pieces! And I try to move on~ But it seems my Alexandra, has now become Dawn. Yeah, she's now become Dawn.
Not bad with the rhyming. Not much for poetry myself, though.Thanks. It actually means something that you read it, let alone said something about it. It's more of a lyrical piece, I guess, because I sang it in my head.
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Posted: Fri Jul 06, 2007 10:50 pm
Meta_Fish Tatsuman Meta_Fish I feel empty. It's like I'm alone. My heart's been turned to stone. So I hand it to you, baby~ " Together?" You say maybe~ And then you turn. And you drop it. When you see him again! And my heart is broken! I'm naught but a man! So I pick up the pieces! And I try to move on~ But it seems my Alexandra, has now become Dawn. Yeah, she's now become Dawn.
Not bad with the rhyming. Not much for poetry myself, though.Thanks. It actually means something that you read it, let alone said something about it. It's more of a lyrical piece, I guess, because I sang it in my head. It's actually pretty good. O:
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Posted: Fri Jul 06, 2007 10:51 pm
Meta_Fish I feel empty. It's like I'm alone. My heart's been turned to stone. So I hand it to you, baby~ " Together?" You say maybe~ And then you turn. And you drop it. When you see him again! And my heart is broken! I'm naught but a man! So I pick up the pieces! And I try to move on~ But it seems my Alexandra, has now become Dawn. Yeah, she's now become Dawn. The first half was good, to me the second half didnt flow as well.
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Posted: Fri Jul 06, 2007 10:53 pm
Lifeless-Fox It's actually pretty good. O: Thanks. I mean it, thank you. Seaphron The first half was good, to me the second half didnt flow as well. It's unfortunate I can't transpose the music that's in my head. It might sound better then.
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Posted: Fri Jul 06, 2007 10:56 pm
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Posted: Fri Jul 06, 2007 10:57 pm
Meta_Fish It's unfortunate I can't transpose the music that's in my head. It might sound better then. No worries I cant write poetry at all, that was good. I like your writing.
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Posted: Fri Jul 06, 2007 11:00 pm
Meta_Fish Tatsuman Meta_Fish I feel empty. It's like I'm alone. My heart's been turned to stone. So I hand it to you, baby~ " Together?" You say maybe~ And then you turn. And you drop it. When you see him again! And my heart is broken! I'm naught but a man! So I pick up the pieces! And I try to move on~ But it seems my Alexandra, has now become Dawn. Yeah, she's now become Dawn.
Not bad with the rhyming. Not much for poetry myself, though.Thanks. It actually means something that you read it, let alone said something about it. It's more of a lyrical piece, I guess, because I sang it in my head.
I read everything in here. I'm not too good at keeping quiet. 
Ah. I kinda figured that. The 3rd and last line sounded song-ish It would sound better as a song. Kind of Emo-rockish.
Maybe a power ballad...
Either way, I flows better when reading it as if a song, if that makes any sense.
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Posted: Fri Jul 06, 2007 11:01 pm
Lavableman Betman Lavableman hellz ya brutha sry 4 levn u hanjn der man o iz ok mn i hukin up mai maispaes dats tit! dats tit! o dud i maed u wate 2 sry i jst got cot up in it u no? ya i fele u maen
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