Welcome to Gaia! ::

xp

wewt
that frog looks like my gramma's pet frog 3nodding

xd

blah. this has become my new spam thread. I got this email. and belive it. its true XD

Rules of Austin

1. First, it's pronounced AWS-TUN. It doesn't matter how they say it in
other places.
2. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Austin has its own
set of
traffic rules. There's no book about them. All you can do is get in
your car
and hope you survive to learn them.
3. All directions start with "Go down Mopac...'cause you don't want to
get
on I-35." No one knows for sure what 'Mopac' means.
4. Burnet Road, Braker Lane, and Lamar Blvd. have no beginning and no
end.
5. It is impossible to go around a block and wind up on the same street
that
you started on. The Chamber of Commerce calls this a scenic drive.
6. The 8:00am rush hour is from 6:30am to 9:30am. The 5:00pm rush hour
is
from 3:30p to 7:15pm. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday morning.
7. If you actually stop at a yellow light, then you cannot be from
Austin.
You may only apply your brakes when the end of a yellow light and the
beginning of the red light create a burnt-orange hue. This is Longhorn
Country, after all.
8. If you like being an individual, don't even think of working for
Dell.
You'll be branded like cattle and made to walk all over town with your
Dell
Tag around your neck or clipped on to your belt loop. Ninety-eight
percent
of the people within a 200 mile radius work for Dell. When someone says
"Michael Dell", Dell employees are trained to face Round Rock, hit
their
knees, put their face to the ground, weep, and rock back and forth.
9. Just remember that Mopac IS Loop 1; Capital of Texas Hwy IS 360; and
U.S.
183 IS Research Blvd., Anderson Land, Ed Bluestein Blvd. and Old
Bastrop
Hwy; 2222 IS Northland Dr. or Allendale Rd. or Koenig Lane. Don't try
to
figure it out. Just accept it. If you question the intelligence behind
this
naming convention, people will simply tilt their heads to the right and
stare at you.
10. If moisture is determined to be rain, and not sweat, all traffic
must
immediately come to a screeching halt; ditto for daylight savings time,
a
female UT student applying eye-shadow across the street, or a flat tire
three lanes over.
11. DO NOT attempt to access any road after an apocalyptic event like
snow
or SXSW (South by Southwest Music Convention). Construction on I-35 AND
U.S.
183 is a way of life and a permanent form of entertainment. Get used to
it!
12. Attn: All telephone solicitors...DO NOT correct my pronunciation
when I
say I live in Manchaca, TX. It's pronounced MAN-shack (just like a man
living in shack). Also realize that the city of Manchaca (MANshack) is
in
Hays and Travis Counties, and there is also a very long street in
Austin
named Manchaca (MANshack)! The city of Manor and Manor Rd. are
pronounced
'MAY-ner'. We don't like corrections on that either. And, for God's
sake,
DON'T pronounce the 'E' at the end of Guadalupe. It's Gwada-LOOP and we
like
it that way!
13. Burnet Road is pronounced BURN-it, not Bur-NET. Koenig Lane is
pronounced KAE-nig not KOE-nig. The old airport (Robert Mueller) is
pronounced Robert Miller and is on Airport Boulevard. The new airport
(Austin-Bergstrom) is no where near Airport Boulevard. It's in the city
of
Del Valle pronounced Dell Valley!
14. Keep in mind that the sloppily dressed 'hippie' in worn-out sandals
and
earrings is probably the latest IPO millionaire around here.
15. Stay away from the Congress Ave. bridge at sundown if you do not
like
the thought of being in an Alfred Hitchcock movie. (Largest Mexican
Free
Tail Bat Population in the US)
16. And, yes, we all know that there's a man in a teddy and a tiara on
Congress Ave. It's Leslie and he probably makes more money than you do.
(Surely, you have a homeless, celebrity drag queen that likes to run
for
Mayor where you live, too, right?)

**And you wonder why there are so many bumper stickers that say 'Keep
Austin
Weird'!**

awww poooor sis! *runs off since he's wanted*

XP

sawed madagasgar (I was laughing sooooo hard. tis a great movie, truely), and not I'm just trying hard not to curl up reading for the next few days. I'll prolly read the book twice before I become 'active' again XP