Welcome to Gaia! ::

Two guys were putting up shelves setting up a new retail store in New York City.

Sitting down to take a break and one says to the other, "I'll give you even odds inside of two minutes some damned tourist will put his face up to the window there and ask what we're selling - and we're a week from even being open yet!"

Sure enough, a few seconds later a curious fellow walks up to the window and peeks in to ask in a heavy 'State-O-Maine' accent, "Ay-yuh, an' what ah ya sellin' in he-yah ennyhow?"

The first guy shoots back, "Oh, we're selling assholes here."

Without skipping a beat the Mainer says, "Ay-yuh - wal' ya must be doing some old gol-damned good. Yah only got but two left aintcha?"

You don't have to tell me, but you aren't the only one telling jokes. (Not trying to be mean

I did tell you. I just didn't see your post before because it only showed up when I submitted my post.


An old man, a boy, and a donkey were travelling. The boy rode the donkey while the man walked.

In the first town they went to, the people all said; "How hard for that old man who has to walk!"

The two travellers heard this and decided that the boy should walk and the old man should ride.

In the next town, people whispered, "What a shame, he makes the little boy walk!"

So the pair decided that they should both ride.
In the third town, people all muttered about how cruel it was to make the donkey work so hard.

So the boy and the old man decided to carry the donkey.

On the way to the next town, they had to go across a bridge. As they walked across it, they slipped and the donkey fell in to the river and drowned.

The moral of the story is - If you try to please everyone, you will eventually end up losing your a**.


I'm not trying to be annoying with the jokes and stuff....I'm just not very good at saying randomness. I am however good at looking up jokes. So there we go.

A farm boy accidentally overturned his wagonload of corn. The farmer who lived nearby heard the noise and yelled over to the boy, "Hey Willis, forget your troubles. Come in and visit with us. I'll help you get the wagon up later."
"That's mighty nice of you," Willis answered, "but I don't think Pa would like me to."

"Aw come on boy," the farmer insisted.

"Well okay," the boy finally agreed, and added, "but Pa won't like it."

After a hearty dinner, Willis thanked his host. "I feel a lot better now, but I know Pa is going to be real upset."

"Don't be foolish!" the neighbor said with a smile. "By the way, where is he?"

"Under the wagon."

I'm replying to your jokes because I can't think of anything else to say...my brain is dead at the moment.

Ow...my cat is biting my arm because I won't pet him...

Ouch o_o That's rather mean....if my cat isn't getting petted she just nudges our arms

Agh... biggrin smile redface crying stare xd 3nodding blaugh gonk scream stressed sweatdrop heart domokun xp whee wink sad surprised eek confused cool lol mad razz cry evil twisted rolleyes exclaim question idea arrow neutral mrgreen ninja 4laugh rofl pirate talk2hand burning_eyes cheese_whine dramallama wahmbulance emo Dang. You know you're brain dead when you can't think of anything but this to post. *sighs*

*hugs* Nothing mean. Yays that you won ^_^

I'm annoyed. My dad just told me to shut up. All because I asked him if he would rather watch this programme on TV that he liked. I am utterly SICK of him telling me to shut up when I'm just trying to be nice or when he takes it out on me coz he's annoyed with someone else.