Love At His Fingertips
Chapter 9
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“Lee! Why do you keep doing this?” Naruto shouted, feeling his stomach churn. Oh geez… Is that the ramen I had this morning?
“Oh! I’m sorry, Naruto-kun! I forgot about how my youthful enthusiasm affected you!” said Lee, turning Naruto around so he was holding him bridal-style. “Is this better?”
Naruto sighed. “I guess… But I’d really rather run on my own.”
“But Naruto-kun! No offense intended at all, but I run faster than you! And we must get away from those unworthy of your beauty!”
“Yyyeah… I think we got away, Lee,” said Naruto, motioning behind them. No one was following them anymore.
“Oh!” Lee stopped running and looked around. “You are correct!”
“Okay, well,” said Naruto, squirming out of Lee’s grasp, “I think I’ll try and think of a solution now…”
Naruto paced around, trying to think of something. Unfortunately, pacing never did help his thinking, so his mind just wouldn’t work. “Ugh! What am I supposed to do?!”
Lee, who was sitting underneath a tree, watching him pace, suggested, “Do what Hokage-sama said to do!”
“How did you know I went to see Tsunade-obaachan?” Naruto asked, looking at Lee suspiciously.
Lee blushed. “Um… Well…” Tears suddenly ran down his face in waterfalls. “I’M SORRY! I WAS WATCHING YOU! BUT I DID NOT EAVESDROP! I DIDN’T HEAR A WORD!”
Naruto’s eye twitched. “Um… it’s fine, Lee… No need to get so emotional.”
“Oh, Naruto-kun!” Lee shouted, suddenly right in front of him. Lee grabbed Naruto’s hands and held them to his chest. “You have no idea how much that means to me!!”
“What it means to you? Huh?! You’re right, I have no idea,” said Naruto. Lee is so weird…
Naruto’s ear twitched. “Hold on a second. I hear something.”
“Hm? I hear nothing, Naruto-kun.”
“No, no, I definitely heard something,” said Naruto, turning back to the direction they came from. “It sounded like someone… screaming my name…”
---
“NA-RU-TOOOOOO!” Shikamaru screamed, running as fast as his legs would carry him. Beside him, Akamaru was barely keeping up, barking with every paw that hit the ground.
The race was on.
---
Naruto gulped. “Sh*t.”
Lee poked Naruto on the nose. “Naruto-kun, that word is not fitting for a person like you.”
“Haha, of course, of course! Sorry, dattebayo!” said Naruto, laughing nervously. “Well, um, let’s be off, shall we?” He turned and walked quickly towards Konoha. “How about we go relax in… I don’t know… Somebody’s basement, or in Konoha jail, hm? Someplace very far away, with lots of locks and security.”
Lee was confused, but he followed Naruto happily anyway. “Whatever you want to do is fine with me, Naruto-kun!” he said, a skip in his step.
Just as Lee moved, a kunai flew through the spot where he had been standing and hit a tree. Naruto turned, sweat rolling down his face.
“They’re back!”
“LEE! Today is the day that you die!” Shikamaru shouted. “How dare you? Being in my darling’s presence, alone! I shall kill you, and then my dearest one will be mine!
“ARF ARF ARF ARF! Arf grr bark RUFF! Growl gar arf grr ruff, arf bark bark WOOF!”
(Translation: HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA! I’ll kill you BOTH! And then my mate and I shall feast on your bones, as is tradition in my family!!)
“I don’t know what he said, but it sounded freaky, dattebayo! Let’s run!” shouted Naruto, turning to scamper off. “C’mon, Lee!”
“NO!” yelled Lee, standing to face them bravely. “I’m through running! I shall defeat them for you, Naruto-kun, and then you will be free to do as you wish!”
“Uh…Well, okay then… You know what? You’re right!” Naruto suddenly felt his courage returning. “Why have I been running? I can defeat them myself!”
Naruto lunged at Shikamaru with a shuriken in hand, screaming a battle cry. Shikamaru dodged the shuriken, pulled out a rose, and wrapped his arm around Naruto’s waist. “I’m so glad you finally decided to approach me, Naruto,” Shikamaru said suavely.
Naruto shivered. “Ack!”
“Tell me, my sweet,” said Shikamaru, putting the end of the stem between his lips, “Have you ever kissed someone with a rose in his mouth? It can be rather painful, but quite enjoyable all the same. Would you care to try it?”
Before Naruto could object, Shikamaru leaned down and kissed Naruto straight on the lips. Lee freaked. “NARUTO-KUUUUNNNN!”
A thorn scratched against Naruto’s skin, and he suddenly disappeared in a cloud of smoke. Shikamaru gasped. “A clone!”
The real Naruto came out from behind a tree. “N-never mind. You can handle it, right, Lee?” he asked nervously. He rubbed his arms up and down and muttered, “Happy place, happy place, happy place…”
“Oh! Thank goodness, Naruto-kun!” said Lee happily. “YOSH! I shall get rid of them for you!” he shouted, getting into fighting position.
“Wait a minute…” Naruto finally realized what he had to do. Why the hell didn’t I do this sooner?! “LEE!”
“Yes, Naruto-kun!” Lee shouted, preparing for Shikamaru’s and Akamaru’s next move.
“Lee, I… I choose YOU!”
Lee gasped. “Eh?”
Shikamaru glared. “EH?!”
Akamaru growled. “GRR?!”
Tears rolled from Lee’s eyes, his cheeks turning pink. “NARUTO-KUN!”
Shikamaru scowled. “No matter! Then I shall have you by force, my precious angel!”
“WHAT?!” Naruto and Lee shouted simultaneously.
Akamaru seemed to grin. “Grr…”
Naruto squeaked. “Crap!” That wasn’t enough?!
All of a sudden, a slug fell from the treetops and landed on Naruto’s face. “ACK! WHAT THE HELL?!”
Shikamaru, Akamaru, and Lee, in the midst of their three-way battle, did not notice. They continued fighting, kunai hitting kunai, fists hitting faces, teeth biting into arms.
Naruto pulled the slug off of his face, glaring at it. “That was really random, you know—OH!” The slug! It was one of Tsunade’s!
“Tsunade-obaachan? What does she want?” asked Naruto angrily.
The slug waved its head downward, motioning towards its stomach. Naruto looked down and gasped. There was writing on its stomach.
KISS HIM
Naruto groaned. “Oh, hell no…”
The slug slipped out of his hands and began to crawl away. Naruto tried to kick it, but missed.
“Are you having fun, Tsunade-obaachan?” Naruto asked to the heavens, turning his head up to the sky, “WELL? ARE YA?!”
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Tsunade grinned. “I sure am!”
---
Naruto sighed. “I can’t do this… There’s no way I can do this.” He crossed his arms over his chest defiantly. “I am NOT doing THAT!”
He looked back at the three fighting ferociously over him. “…Then again, if Lee loses, Shikamaru and Akamaru will force me to love them… or worse…” He shuddered. “Ewwww…”
He stood up, trying to get all his nerve together. “Okay, Naruto, you can do this. You can do this. Believe in yourself. You can do this!”
He walked up to the three who were fighting and shouted, “HEY!”
They stopped instantly. It was quite a mess. Shikamaru’s foot was in Akamaru’s gut, Akamaru was chewing on Lee’s head, Lee’s fist was in Shikamaru’s face, and Shikamaru was biting Lee’s leg. It made a very odd triangle.
Instead of making sense of the thing, Naruto walked right up to Lee and grabbed his face. He closed his eyes, thinking, it’s Sakura, imagine it’s Sakura!!
Shikamaru’s and Akamaru’s jaws dropped, making Akamaru fall to the ground and Lee’s leg go free. Shikamaru’s cheeks turned crimson. “…Whoa.”
Naruto quickly pulled away, his face red. So. Humiliating.
Lee looked like he was petrified. His cheeks were scarlet, his mouth was open, and his eyes were glistening.
Shikamaru abruptly shook his head and groaned. “Ow…” He grabbed his head in pain. “I feel like I just went through extreme physical activity…”
Akamaru began digging in the dirt.
Lee was still petrified.
“Lee? Yo, Lee,” said Naruto, snapping his fingers in front of Lee’s face. “Hey, wake up, man. You’re scaring me.”
No response.
“Lee?” Naruto shook Lee’s shoulder, getting worried. “It’s over, Lee. Wake up, dattebayo.”
“N-n-naruto… kun…” Lee sniffled. “My… my first kiss…”
Naruto’s eyes went wide. “WHAT?! Oh, geez, I… I’m sorry, Lee, um… I didn’t mean—“
“I’M SO HAPPY!” Lee shouted, squeezing Naruto into his chest.
Naruto felt shock run through his body. “EH? EH? EH? EH?”
“Naruto-kun… I hoped and dreamed, but I didn’t really think you’d return my feelings!! I LOVE YOU AS WELL, NARUTO-KUN!!”
“AAAAAHHH! NO! IT’S SUPPOSED TO BE OVER, DATTEBAYOOO!”
Shikamaru sighed and walked away, not wanting to get involved. “I’ll just go and try to forget this ever happened…”
Akamaru barked happily and followed him, wondering where Kiba was.
---
Kiba groaned. “Ow… what happened?” He looked over himself, confused. “Are these Akamaru’s teeth marks? And why do I smell like you, Akamaru, Naruto, and Shikamaru?”
“I get the oddest feeling we were doing something that we will never live down,” said Shino, sitting up. “…Why is there a rose in my pants?”
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Tsunade laughed. “He’s so stupid!”
“Tsunade-sama, why didn’t you just tell him it wore off after 24 hours?” asked Shizune, ashamed of her Hokage.
Tsunade stared intently into her crystal ball. “The little brat threatened me with pranks for the rest of my life. What did you expect me to do?”
Shizune sighed. “Well, now he’s stuck with Lee until the end of the day…”
“Have you forgotten, Shizune?” asked Tsunade, turning to her assistant. “When you choose someone, they love you for a much longer time than 24 hours. It’s like a love potion. That’s why it was invented; for people who didn’t care about another person’s feelings to get what they wanted.” She laughed evilly. “I never dreamed he would choose Lee. This is so great…” She turned back to her crystal ball, giggling.
Shizune could feel sweat rolling down her face. “Poor, poor Naruto…”
---
…ten years later…
“NARUTO-KUUUUNNN!”
Naruto turned to Lee, sighing. “Hello, Lee.”
“Naruto-kun, I got you some flowers!” said Lee, handing him a bouquet of yellow tulips.
Naruto grinned nervously. “Thank you, Lee.”
Lee wrapped his arm around Naruto’s shoulders, kissing him on the cheek. “They mean ‘passionate love’!”
Naruto kept grinning, blushing from embarrassment. “That’s lovely, Lee.”
“Just like you!”
“Thank you, Lee.”
“Goodbye, Naruto-kun!” said Lee, skipping off.
Naruto groaned, throwing the tulips in a nearby trash can. “Goodbye, Lee.”
All was quiet. A giggle cut through the silence.
“I SWEAR, IF YOU WEREN’T STILL HOKAGE, I WOULD FREAKIN’ KILL YOU!” Naruto shouted, grinding his teeth as he turned to Tsunade.
Tsunade winked. “That’s what you get for painting my office orange, brat!”
THE END
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