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Alright, I tend to be a little long-winded, so just a head’s up.

Shiva's Edge:

Literacy: 4 1/2. I'm a stickler for spelling/grammar. That's just me. It comes from having an English major in the family. You're wording is very good, for the most part. "Infantile prattling" is a phrase I've used myself occasionally, so kudos for that. You're not too wordy, but it’s not overly simplistic, either. Your posts tend to be rather short, but to the point. There's not a whole lot of embellishment to it. That's good and bad, because while it does make it easy to follow your actions, it can get a little bit monotonous. You could do with explaining the details a little more.

Terminology: 3. You use fairly straightforward terminology, which I like. More complex stuff is fun to read, but can get a little dense at times. I only found one term that you used wrong. "Sheath" means to put away. You "unsheathe" a sword to use it.

Technological Capability: 3. I like the holographic projector idea. It's something that's unexpected, especially for a 'mech fight. Jammers or ECM I can see, but a projector is a different way to put it. What I don’t see is how you’re using a hologram, since they’re just an image. Unless its like the one from Star Trek that has mass and will show up as such. It’s a cool idea, but you need to be more specific if you’re going to use it as a full-spectrum decoy. You use the word "Blaster", which is pretty generic. I mean, who doesn't know what a blaster is? What I think might be better, though, would be if you described what type of blaster it is. Energy? Plasma? Projectile? What? "Divine Arm" is your sword, right? Well, what does it look like? Is it curved? Is it made of some metal with interesting properties? Is it a plasma saber that has gold filigree on the crossguard? How do you use it? Details are key. What is a "Koredemo Kurana Psycho Blaster"? Is it some mental/abstract power attack that you just unleash, or is it generated by something? You don't really explain what it is, just that it's an energy wave that you used. It sounds like you have some pretty cool stuff, but it would be better if you explained it a little more. Also: where are your defenses? You don't mention anything other than "shifting positions" and you don't appear to carry a shield or anything else.

Choice of Action: 2. The inital attack using stealth is good. Surprise is a hard thing to fight, and if you can pull it off, you're at an advantage. However, if you are able to use a diversion like that, hit the person you're fooling with something other than floating garbage. One thing that I noticed is that you don't get hit. You say that the damage "isn't as great as [you] thought"...so what does that mean? Did you get your paint scratched, or do you have a hole in your torso? I can see you dodging the sword attacks, or even drawing your own sword and parrying them, but all you do is "shift positions" and blast away. Your force wave destroying the projectiles is another good idea, but you carry the effect over a little far. Unleashing an attack that's powerful enough to destroy attacking projectiles, and then bowl your opponent backwards is probably all you'd have time to do. Buy you immediately follow up with a sword attack, and then apparently with your blaster. That's a little much to do all at once, and I don't think its very plausible. If your energy wave is that powerful, to destroy all the attacking projectiles, and knock your opponent backwards, you'd need a few moments to recover or catch your breath before following up. Also, you dictate that your shots hit, and how they hit, which doesn't give your opponent any room to evade, counterattack, or really do any action other than decide how to take a hit. Also, aiming for your opponent's sword was a good idea; you disarmed him for a few moments. However, you shouldn't have made the decision that you destroyed it, because for all you know, your shots would only have bounced off or dented it.

Attitude: 2. Your attitude is fairly constant. You're really combative, which is good, but you're also a little abrasive. Taunts are okay, but you're just plain insulting. At the beginning, trading preliminary insults are kind of expected, but you have a kind of...I dunno...arrogance that continues through the entire duel and really begins to grate. Also, if you're going to talk like that, then back it up with action. You can call your opponent's attacks "feeble" all you want, but if they hit you with something good, the least you can do is acknowledge the fact.
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Leowen:

Literacy:5. Nicely done. I like the structure and the word choice. You have a pretty good narrative idea, and the details don't come too thick that they overwhelm the action. You describe what you're doing and your surroundings with a lot of detail, which is good. There is a clear separation between the dialogue and the action, which makes it much easier to read. You wince, show emotion, and other things that kind of flesh out the post. You write a lot, but it doesn't come across as too wordy. Nice choice of words with "stoic". As much as I am a fan of the waxing philosophic in the middle of a battle... it might be just a little bit much. If you're fighting, and trying to deal out/evade blows, will you have time to be eloquent? I do like the "laws of Physics" line, though.

Terminology: 4 1/2. You do a good job of explaining all the functions of your mech and weapons, describing the firing of jets, magnetic grapples, etc. You describe what your arms and hands are doing, as well as what is happening to your mech's structure and armor. The way you describe the function of the sword, shield, and weapons projectiles is also very good. Oh, and it's "spread-eagled", not "spread-eagle".

Technological Capability: 4. Very nice stuff you have on that mech. The flaming sword is a nice touch...but why/how is it on fire? I like the small pulse-laser projectiles. Mutliple attack vectors are a very cool idea. One thing that I think is a very unique idea is that you re-formed your sword blade. I like the concept. The shield is a very good idea, and you explain how you use it in conjunction with your sword. You also mention your armor, which is good.

Choice of Action: 4. Admittedly, you had to spend a lot of your time on the defensive, but your actions seemed appropriate. Circling the enemy to size them up is a good way to start. You took damage (thank you) and kept going with that. Your attacks/counterattacks were good, and seemed well-concieved. Nice job again with the projectiles for a ranged attack. Setting them for a random path was a good idea, even if they were destroyed.

Attitude: 5. I like the attitude of your character towards battle. Your opening taunt was expected, but you're more wry or sarcastic than abrasive with your insults. That is good, because they seem more of a character thing than just throwing insults and taunts out would be. For example, "lets see how fast you can move" is something that portrays your attitude at that moment.

What is a "Koredemo Kurana Psycho Blaster"

It's just Psycho Blaster. The rest is a failed attempt to sound cool by spewing Japanese.

[ Message temporarily off-line ]

(if that posting he made is Not called predestination like you said locke then this contest is 1 sided)

hmph look who is talking of attitude so im supposed to take your "RP" insults and smile?
please dont be so ignorant as to think anyone would accept that.

the RP is ended you won end of story do not continue this senseless arguement as it makes us both look petty understand?
this is not the place to discuss any other comments if at all

(a glowing aura from my person "glowed/lit up the hall) you have to coment on my mood statement too? stressed

((Weekends are fine with me. School is rather heavy this year.))



Ander enters the arena where his heavily modified Valkyrie stands. *Well...let's see what this piece of junk can do...* he thinks with a wry grin. He climbs into the cockpit and straps in. Ander powers the mech up, checking and re-checking each system as they come on line. He attaches a plasma saber to the inside of each forearm, for quick access, and attaches his backup sabers to the mech's "waist". He then picks up his beam rifle, checks the charge, and makes sure that it is tied in to his mech's targeting system. *Alright. Weapons check out...thrusters, targeting, auto-reloaders...diagnostic checks complete. 'Cry havoc, and let slip the dogs of war!'* Ander smiles to himself, and then lets the smile fade as he takes a moment to prepare mentally for the coming duel, focusing his mind and readying his jedi powers. "Let's do this," he says, and enters the arena, his senses preternaturally alert. He inclines his head towards his opponent. "May fortune favor the foolish."

"The game's afoot, huh?" Ander says as he watches the blue and red monstrosity lumber towards him. He thumbs the selector switch on his beam rifle to burst mode and snaps it up into firing position, simultaneously readying his back and leg thrusters. He locks his crosshairs dead center on Granzon's torso and presses the firing stud. Bolts of coherent light streak towards his opponent as Ander's mech rises on a column of superheated plasma.

*What the...?* Ander senses Granzon's attack a fraction of a second before it comes, but it isn't quite fast enough. Beams burn through the air around Ander's mech, scoring the surface of his armor as he fires his lateral thrusters and throws his mech into a midair roll. He drops his rifle to get it out of the way, snaps his plasma sabers into his mech's hands and ignites them, spinning the green blades to block the rest of shots being fired at him. "I'll do better than 'block that'!" Ander focuses his mental powers, and changes the deflection angle of his blades, bouncing four of Granzon's beams back into their 'holes' and sending the rest straight towards his opponent. "I believe you have 'incoming'."