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Lmao.

Ok, this is more something that happened to me when I'm older than involving kids but it was just too funny, on at a Christmas party I was holding this two week old, he was so adorable and tiny, well after we left I was talking to my older friend (and mother of two) Dorothy, she said "You know...it's kind of creepy, how comfortable you are with kids...there's nothing wrong with it it's just kind of creepy um...close your legs!" then we both burst out laughing.

Aright, here are a few:

When my sister was about three or four, she managed to sneak out of the house and began to run up and down the block in broad daylight. Here's the catch: she was BUTT-NEKKID!! Then the neighbor saw her, but wasn't entirely sure what to do. A grown man chasing a naked four-year-old girl down the street?

The other time was whenI was a baby. My dad (who is Indian) decided to make some paneer, which is a kind of Indian cheese, for dinner. Now, to make paneer, you have to boil a whole lot of whole milk (Because cow milk is only 4% fat, a gallon will give you maybe 5 oz. of cheese, so it's a fair bit expensive) and strain it through a cheesecloth. So he went out and bought a whole bunch of whole milk, boiled it, and then went to find a cheesecloth. Unfortunately, we don't have one, so he grabbed a cloth out of the hamper to strain it in, and let it sit overnight.
The next day, he opens the cloth and removes the cheese and finds a tremendous yellow stain on it. Guess what? The cloth he had used to strain the cheese was a cloth daiper of mine, waiting to be cleaned. razz

I feel like Bob Sagget!

I had a horrible case of Oedipus complex (what's the one for females?) when I was a kid (and to a certain extent still do).

So one day, my mom came into the house from gardening and told us that she had seen a fox. My dad was all impressed and asked a bunch of questions and they were both talking about the fox. I was horribly jealous that my mom was getting all this attention from my dad and I wasn't. So I ran outside and then ran back in and said "I saw a fox too!" This was, of course, not very impressive since mom had just seen one. So I decided to up the ante a little. "Except MINE was wearing a hat and glasses!" *cast a gloating look at mom* Both my parents burst out laughing. It took me about two years to figure out why.

When I was little, I knew that men pee standing up and women pee sitting down. So one day, I asked my dad how men poop if they are standing up when they go to the bathroom. Being the smartass that he is, my dad answers "don't be silly. Boys don't poop!" I believed this until I was about twelve years old, at which point I realized that it didn't make any sense. I brought this up with my dad a few years ago and he laughed and said "omg, I had no idea you would take it so seriously! I don't even remember saying that!"

We had a patch of strawberries in our garden. One day, my mom was gardening and I came out and tried to eat one of the strawberries. My mother stops me and explains that they aren't ripe yet and that I have to wait to eat them. I say ok, she walks off, etc... A few hours later, she comes back around the house and sees me sitting next to the strawberry patch, staring at them. "What are you doing?" she asked. "Waiting for them to ripen, like you told me to." I think I must have waited there about two hours staring at those stupid strawberries, lol.

One summer, my cousin came to visit from America. She's rather clumsy and bumped into someone. She asked me how to say "excuse me" in case it happened again. I told her it was "vas te faire foutre" (you French speakers out there will know this most definitely does NOT mean "excuse me" but rather is an extremely rude expression meaning something along the lines of "go f- yourself." So she bumps into someone and proudly says what I taught her. Next I see her, she's in tears and telling my mother what I said. Now, fifteen years later, she is a French teacher and not so easily fooled wink

When I was little, I had a nanny. One day, I walked into the bathroom and saw my nanny brushing her teeth. You might think that's not that weird, but you see, she was holding her teeth in her hand at the time (aaah, dentures!). I thought she was an alien or something. I ran screaming out of the house and hid in the chicken coop. My nanny found me quite a long time later and had to call my parents to get me out of the coop.

A bit of a long read, but I hope those were at least fairly entertaining smile

When I was about two years old, my mom took me to the park. I loved going on the slide, but it was really high up. I guess my mom went to get a drink of water, and I was playing in the sand so she turned around for just a second....and when she turned around again, I was climbing up the ladder to go on the slide. Mom watched me, and when I looked ok, she relaxed a bit. And then I tumbled out over the side of the slide on my head.

She screamed and came running. But I just got up, brushed myself off, and climbed back up the slide and went down like nothing happened.

Funny, though, I don't remember doing that...but that could just be because of the bump on the head. xd

This thread is seriously cracking me up. I have so many stories I could add here....I'll just stick with one for now though.

I babysit for two little boys, who are four and 1.5. At one point, I think it was on a TV commercial (I'm not sure as it happened before I started to babysit them), Ben, the older boy, saw someone point at someone who was a little bit pudgy and say they had a buddah body, or something to that extent. So shortly after I start babysitting them, Ben points to his brother Braeden and says, "He's a buddah baby!!!" I just sort of looked at him for a minute, blinked, and went..."What?!?" Ben tells me, "He has a big buddah belly. He's a buddah baby!"

I almost died laughing. Braeden's a bit pudgy of course, being a baby, but still...it was just the strangest thing to hear a then-3 year old say.

Oh these stories are soo funny! Especially the French one. I wouldve done that too if I knew how to speak French! lol