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I don't know ... maybe Google?

Argh.

This is what kind of sucks.

MTV might be making Twilight, and they make horrible films.

If they were to make a movie for Twilight a better company should do it, such as the people who made Lord of the Rings (forgot the name) and even the producers of Harry Potter.

But, I soposse it is better than Disney, can you imagine what they would do to Twilight? gonk

Hmm I have this idea of how the movie should be, and I can't really think of what director would pull it off properly... which is why: a) they should not make a movie; and, b) if they *MUST* make a movie, I should be in charge.

Anyway, this is how the MTV version will be:

[cue commercial for Twilight: The Movie (MTV execs renamed it Eddy and Me: Confessions of a Vampire's Teenage Girlfriend]

[cue bouncy music: "What I Like About You" (the Lillix cover)]

[The set is a bright, sunny day, lots of kids milling around in front of a school building, talking, catching up, etc]

[Voiceover - it's LINDSAY LOHAN as ISABELLA (who is now called IZZY)!!!]

Izzy: It was my first day back at forks high, and I was ready for the usual. Friends, cheerleading practice, Chemestry class -

[cut to scene of bella in chemestry, mixing chemicals and causing an explosion, teacher yelling at her]

Izzy: - I thought that this year would be just like every other. That is, until I met the new student - Edward Cullen.

[music changes, now it's Avril's "Sk8er Boi"]
[cut to scene of EDWARD (played by ASHTON KUTCHER) walking slow motion towards camera with a smile on his face, skateboard in his hand]

Izzy: Edward - or Eddy, as he was soon nicknamed - was a skater - so not my type.

[scene of Edward at some kind of skateboarding competition]

Izzy: Edward was one of those types that just naturally connected with people - even though he was new, he made friends with everyone. Well, not everyone.

[scene of JAMIE (james is now a female) played by HILLARY DUFF complaining to her friends that Eddy is a better skater.]

Izzy: Jamie had always been the best skatergirl around, and now Eddy was taking her place, so she came up with a plan. She would sabotage Eddy right before the big skate show!

[scene of jamie with a screwdriver, removing various parts from Eddy's skateboard]

Izzy: Meanwhile, I was falling more and more in love with Eddy every day. We both sucked at Chemestry, and we were lab partners! Imagine that.

[music: "You're beautiful" by James Blunt]
[scene: Izzy and Ed in chem class, causing chemical reactions. Teacher kicks them out, and in hallway they have one of those -moments- and are kinda staring at each other and inching closer and closer, cut to shot of Jamie around the corner, she sees what's happening with them, cut back to Izzy and Ed, closer, closer, when suddenly *CRASH* and the moment is broken as both jump away from each other. The crash was caused by Jamie trying to ruin their perfect moment.]

Izzy: Now I knew that Eddy would never be mine. I figured life could go back to normal... that is, until -

[music: Simple Plan, "Untitled (How Could this Happen to Me)"]
[Eddy at skate competition, board gives out and he wipes out, resulting in serious injuries. Izzy knows this is because of Jamie. However, Jamie has been visiting Eddy in the hospital, and the first thing he sees when he wakes up from his coma is Jamie's face. Jamie tells him that she was terrified for his life, thought he was going to die, and she's been staying by his bedside for the past 6 weeks, etc, etc. Eddy smiles up at her.]

Izzy: Jamie might have Eddy for the moment, but now I was going to save Eddy from becoming latched into a traumatic relationship with a girl who only wanted to sabotage him! Well, that and be his girlfriend.

[music: okay i cant think of anything. give me suggestions.]
[scene of Jamie clutching Eddy's shoulder, and smiling smugly, because now, not only has she prevented him from beating her at skateboarding, but she also has the guy and, better yet, he's the guy that her worst enemy, Izzy the cheerleader, wants for herself.]

Izzy: While I was trying to think of a plan to rescue Eddy, a terrible thing happened!

[scene: one of the goth kids bites Eddy. Eddy drops his books and falls to the floor, twitching.]

Izzy: Eddy was now back in the hospital. When he came back to school a week later, something about him was different.

[scene: Izzy sitting at lunchtable with her cheerleader friends.
Cheerleader: OMG, and, like, I heard he was a vampire now.
-Eddy conveniently enters lunchroom, dressed all in black.-
Other Cheerleaders: OMG!]

Izzy: It was true, Eddy was a vampire now. The whole school - including Jamie - knew...

[scene: Jamie with friends.
Jamie: OMG I can't date, like, a vampire. That's so, like, last year.
cut to shot of Jamie with Eddy.
Jamie: Eddy, I don't think it's going to work out --
Eddy [sees Izzy walking in the distance]: You're right, Jamie, it isn't. [walks off and starts talking to Izzy]]

Izzy: Eddy was now all mine. It turns out that being a vampire's pretty awesome too, he just eats a lot of hamburger and sometimes drinks tomato juice, but other than needing more protien than us, he's just like you and me! Eddy quickly got back into the skating scene and won the competition. Me and him are so the it couple of the year! We were even voted prom king and queen! As for Jamie, she's doing okay. I even hear she hooked up with the guy that bit Eddy! (this leaves room for a sequel - they can follow Jamie's adventures as a vampire.)

THE END!

Um. Yeah. That was wierd. But that's what they'd do to it.

Omfg!

Hilarious! rofl

That is what it'll totally be like! xp

That was a LOL moment. Gosh, think about what Epurt and Robert will say? (Gah, I'm not spelling the names correctly, it's the show where to guys rate movies with a 2 THUMBSUP/DOWN)

"This movie is so steriotypical! Thumbs down!"

xd No, wait! I forgot - there's no song and dance routine in my version! How could I forget that? It's like, two months later:

*at the school talent show*

[Izzy and Eddy are onstage, much cheering and applause. They break into some kind of broadway style song...

-Eddy singing-

I was a skater boy, the best one on the block
Then one day, in the cafeteria, the goth boy went chomp chomp!


Izzy:
Jamie went see ya later boy, she wouldn't date a vampire,
Now Eddy's mine, and I'm what all the girls aspire

Eddy and Izzy:
To beeeeeeeeeee
And that's cause we're Eddy and Izzy,
And we can sing and dance! Yeah!

[more cheering. they win the talent show.]