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Posted: Tue May 23, 2017 8:10 pm
After tending to Hargitt’s leg, Jakkoa debated as to which course to follow going forward. It was evening already, waning into night, and with Hargitt unconscious but in a volatile physical state, there was little Jakkoa could do without some risk. Despite the fact that the worst of the man’s fever was over — and that he was young, healthy, fit, and as such generally ought to be suited to overcoming physical ailments quickly — his starvation method made Jak particularly concerned, and on periodic occasions still piqued with fleeting anger. What sort of twisted and malevolent- But, he reminded himself, it wasn’t much his business beyond the immediate situation. Hargitt’s health and well-being was his business because they were traveling partners, but no matter how offended or how many personal opinions he’d formed based on the slim amount of information he’d been given about the man’s uncle, he was still Hargitt’s family. Not his. And family matters were private matters. Or, so Jak was taught. So despite his temptation, he resolved not to push—much—and to focus instead on seeing to it that the behavior at least didn’t continue. Whatever deeper complications might lurk beneath the surface would be there to unearth or not as the time came. In the silence post-completion of his physician’s duties, his mind wandered and drifted, and after deciding that he wasn’t inclined to sleep just yet, he took to reading instead, leaving a small lantern lit to see by. He couldn’t have said how long his eyes skimmed the text—a medical tome with a fortunate emphasis on the medicinal qualities of plant matter rather than use of healing energy. While useful, however, it wasn’t the most lively of materials and he may have dozed off himself—or just begun to—when there was a sudden and abrupt jerk of movement. Blinking and shaking the blur from his eyes to look up from his book, Jak observed his company. “Good morning, sunshine.” After a glance over Hargitt’s semi-harried look, combined with the abrupt start to consciousness, he folded a ribbon into his spot and set the book aside. “You’ve missed your chance for daylight, but you should still eat before sleeping for the night.”
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Posted: Thu May 25, 2017 8:13 pm
[16/20]
Hargitt cupped his face in his hands and scrubbed the remainders of sleep away. He could still hear his Uncle, as plain as if the b*****d were standing steps away from him, but when he opened his eyes again there was only Jakkoa, which was a far more welcoming sight.
"Good morning." He smiled; an actual, lazy, pleasant sort of grin. His eyes went to the edges of the tent, where sunlight no longer filtered in. He'd slept most of the day, it seemed, but at least he felt better for it. It was probably the laziest day he'd had in a long, long while, but...surprisingly, Hargitt only found himself mildly chastising himself over it. Taking a rest day had felt surprisingly nice; especially when, as annoying as it was, someone was actually pushing him to sit down more than they were trying to get him up and moving.
"...may I still eat outside?" He wasn't going to argue over eating anymore; he'd already agreed to do it, that much he remembered clearly. His eyes moved from Jakkoa to the tent flap before going back to the food bowl. It was true, he had missed his shot at daylight, but a quiet night under the stars didn't sound so bad.
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Posted: Wed May 31, 2017 6:56 pm
Jakkoa blinked, caught off guard for a moment — and then two, and then many — at Hargitt’s more relaxed, genuinely happy look. It wouldn’t have struck him to think it before, but in the moment he wondered if it truly was such an odd thing as it seemed to be, and in the back of his mind the question stirred, weaving in new inquiries about Hargitt’s overarching serious and somberness with the issues regarding his uncle. Things for a later date. In this moment, pity though the rareness was, Hargitt was smiling, and didn’t seem at all to be lingering on or clinging to prior arguments or moods as he might have worried. And really, the grin was a good look for him. The warmth that came to his own cheeks surprised him, but his lips curved just the same. “Of course…you know I-” ‘-didn’t mean to be bossing you on every item of your day, you don’t need my permission.’ Yet, as he eyed the man, he found himself far more readily reminded of the moments just before Hargitt had fallen unconscious than the arguments that preceded it, and the already-present warmth in his cheeks made itself all the more known. “Of course,” he repeated, quieter and with a dip of his head and another smile that hopefully distracted from any uncharacteristic and unasked for signs of — surprise, really, surely that was all. He rose, taking up the food and lifting the tent flap to exit, and the cool air climbed his skin like a shiver. It was full night, but not a dark one, the stars out in full overhead like glitter on an inky tapestry, and Jakkoa moved to the remains of their fire. Though it had been many hours since it had been fully lit, he was pleased to find the last remains of dying ember buried near the center, and with a little coaxing and light tinder, he soon had a small fire licking up into the brisk air. It wouldn’t last long without more, but it would suffice perfectly for its purpose.
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Posted: Fri Jun 02, 2017 12:24 pm
[17/20]
If Hargitt hadn't known better he might have thought Jakkoa flushed. He took it as a byproduct of the minimalist light within the tent. Candles liked to create shadows and moods where there simply were none, so Hargitt may not have taken notice of it, had Jakkoa not seemed somewhat subdued.
He had started on a sentence, only to fall quiet and respond with a softer bit. Maybe...he was thinking about what had happened earlier. Hargitt hoped not. Whatever he had done hadn't been in his right mind because surely he wouldn't have pushed that boundary, and gone into-
No. He wasn't going to think about. The less he acknowledged what had happened the more likely he was to forget and the whole transgression could be put out of mind. His mind was already a buzz with everything else that had happened in the past forty eight hours; he didn't need to add foreplay to the list.
He rose, this time steadier on his feet, thank the goddess, and made his way outside. The cool air hit his sweaty skin like ice, causing Hargitt's entire body to shiver. While Jakkoa moved forward to resuscitate their fire, Hargitt found himself moving towards the edge of the camp, head canted upward, eyes taking in the stars above. With the air as chilly as it was he wasn't likely to stay away from the fire for long, but for a moment Hargitt took a deep, steady lungful of fresh air and exhaled with a contented sigh.
He made a half turn, and held out his hand, motioning with his head for Jakkoa to join him. "Come. You should see this."
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Posted: Mon Sep 04, 2017 6:01 pm
Jakkoa was still crouched by the fire as Hargitt passed him, pausing at the edge of their camp to draw a full breath, and Jak found his eyes wandering of their own regard, climbing up the back of the man’s frame and really taking him in. Having been traveling with him for quite some time, it wasn’t so much that he no longer appreciated the view, but rather had become accustomed to it—as well as accustomed to the ‘fact’ that it was, no matter how Hargitt’s eyes enjoyed taking him in from time to time, off limits. Their engagement was a ruse and Jakkoa of course knew that, but still enough rebuttals had a way of sinking under the skin. It didn’t help that, gradually, as he had come to know the man, he knew that there was a cooperation between them that wouldn’t be so easily replaced. A familiarity that, whether or not either of them chose to indulge in it any further than partners in travel, was beyond that of anyone Jakkoa had actually slept with.
It didn’t help that he always had found the man incredibly attractive regardless of whether or not he entertained the thought of actually acting further on that interest. Hargitt was a prude, enough so that he wouldn’t have let him even if he was also attracted—which Jakkoa knew that he was.
This evening, though, made it beyond difficult to ignore the unspoken. It was one thing if Hargitt wanted to huff and fuss gruffly, divert his gaze, grow impatient with any night company Jak brought home, and sketch renditions of him in private to ebb an otherwise containable desire so as to ignore it.
It was another thing entirely if he wanted to roll his weight onto Jakkoa and come within minutes or even seconds of toeing the line of their relationship into something else altogether before hastily withdrawing in a feverish daze and refusing to acknowledge it after. Thus, from his crouch and after watching, Jakkoa came to a silent resolution and gave a small smile as he lifted a hand, letting his fingers slip into Hargitt’s offered one as he came to a stand beside him.
“You know,” he said, “if ever the impulse to kiss me comes to you when you are not feverish and delusional, it wouldn’t be an unwelcome gesture.” He let his gaze turn out and up, to the surrounding wilderness and stars overhead. “But of course take as long as you’d like to consider that. Poor form to pressure a patient, and it is a lovely evening that oughtn’t be wasted…”
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Posted: Wed Sep 20, 2017 1:48 pm
Hargitt closed his calloused, weather worn fingers around Jakkoa's and helped to bring the smaller man to his feet. It was so tempting in that moment to bring him closer, to place his hip against the others just as he had minutes ago in the comfort of their tent-
Jakkoa's tent.
And that was enough to remind Hargitt of their relationship, and the nature of his situation. He let go, after perhaps holding Jakkoa's hand for longer than he should have, and exhaled a lungful of air that seemed to have been held captive by his racing heart.
"Jakkoa, what happened in there....it won't happen again." He said it with enough finality that during the final words Hargitt was at a loss as to who he was really trying to convince. It was one thing for Jakkoa to bring back whatever kind of bed partner he wanted, because they never lasted, were always tossed away, and seemed to matter little to his traveling companion. And Hargitt...was already in far too deep to know he wouldn't be able to do his job if he crossed that line. "I was not in my right mind, and I am sorry."
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Posted: Wed Sep 20, 2017 6:02 pm
Hargitt’s hand was rough, and warm. In the length of time he let theirs linger in contact, Jakkoa noted that it was, for whatever reason, a more notable moment than ever he’d noticed before when engaged in nothing more than a clasping of hands. Then he released, and Jak’s gaze lifted.
…it won’t happen again.
The corner of Jakkoa’s lip twitched — amusement, in spite of himself, plucking up the corner of his mouth as his eyes lit with keen interest. “Well, I would certainly hope not, yes,” he admitted. “I do rather prefer it when men are in their right mind, and I should think we might manage keeping you from being bitten by an out-of-place keldari and passing into another feverish slumber only to molest me afterwards. I’d aim in the future for something more…mutually present experience.”
After eyeing the man a moment, Jakkoa’s smile softened and he turned his gaze instead toward the stars. “I know that you’re attracted to me, you don’t need to waste energy denying that. I’m more curious as to why you’re so insistent on pretending it isn’t so. I’ll respect that you don’t want to sleep with me, if you explain to me why.”
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Posted: Wed Sep 20, 2017 7:54 pm
Hargitt turned his eyes to Jakkoa, and the fire lighting up his features like molten gold. There simply wasn't an aspect about the man's physique that Hargitt didn't find attractive, and that made it all the harder to ignore those urges. Even now, watching the way the flesh of Jakkoa's neck shift while he looked up to the stars...it was enough to bring up memories and it would drive Hargitt mad if he let it.
But he was stronger than that; he had to be firm.
"I know that you're free with your lovers, and choose them based on your urges at the time. I don't think less of you for it, but I don't want to be part of it. I prefer that my intimacies are shared with someone I love, and that during our time together the man I sleep with isn't shared with others." Hargitt shrugged with shoulders with a little half grin. "It's old fashioned, but that's me."
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Posted: Sat Sep 23, 2017 6:54 am
Jakkoa listened, and watched. Fortunately, Hargitt was forthright, making immediately clear the core of the problem, and by his commentary’s end, Jak hummed.
“So. You think you’d be like ‘everyone else?’” he asked. “You mention ‘my lovers’ and that you do not want to be a part of ‘it’, my sex life, and explain that you prefer intimacies with someone you love as though these are mutually exclusive approaches to life…do you think the fact that I feel free to bed whom I please when the opportunity presents itself means I have no interest in a more serious relationship? I am choosey, you know…” He pressed an emphasizing fingertip to Hargitt’s chest. “Whether you believe it or not. I don’t believe I’d want to entertain a long term engagement with most anyone I bed, but I enjoy just that portion enough that I don’t see why I should deprive myself of it simply because I hadn’t yet found someone up to my taste as far as something more permanent would be concerned…”
He eyed Hargitt, and then let his hands drop.
“I don’t know what kind of dim, single-minded thought process you imagine goes on in my mind, but I assure you, you are not like ‘everyone else’ I have bedded so I don’t quite see why you would expect to be treated the same. I am free with my lovers when I am free, but if that is your sole concern I’ll inform you now it’s misplaced. If the opportunity for a stable, dependable, attractive, intelligent and committed relationship was before me, I would happily trade the chore of seeking out pure sexual gratification for a combination of that and other emotional fulfillments on a regular basis without the seeking. But, if you need a night to think on it or some time spent courting and celibate for me to win over your faith, I am sure I could oblige you that…”
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Posted: Sun Sep 24, 2017 7:50 pm
What had Jakkoa really shown to him that proved he wouldn't be like the others? He hadn't stopped seeing them; they still came, so it wasn't as if the other man had committed to the sole task of wooing.
"At this time, yes, that's how I see it. Because if you were then no other would satisfy you." And from the sounds he'd over heard on more than one occasion he was being plenty satisfied.
Perhaps it was foolish for him to even believe that might be true. That such a thing could happen, and that it would happen in his favor this time around. Hargitt knew that a bond was forming between the two of them; he wasn't fool enough to deny it. And yet, the very ambiguous nature of that connection left him hesitant. It would be hard to part ways with Jakkoa when the time came, but would it be better now, if he stayed firm and didn't give in?
Or would it be worth it just to throw caution to the wind?
"You've said it as much yourself. You don't see a reason to stop, and I don't see a reason to start." If Jakkoa couldn't see a valid reason before him that he should cease in his casual flings to pursue something more worthwhile then Hargitt wasn't about to throw himself to the wolves. In the end they would only part on ugly terms, and Hargitt didn't want that.
He scrunched his brow, the effects of the day still wearing on him. As tired and hungry as the man was, his mental processes were spent trying to work around what it was Jakkoa was really trying to say. "I...will need time to think."
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Posted: Sat Oct 14, 2017 3:47 pm
If you were, then no other would satisfy you…
Jakkoa tisked softly. So far as he was concerned it was entirely possible to have an attitude capable of being satisfied by either, or at the very least with both prospects in mind and open to trying. He simply hadn’t found anyone he’d been interested enough in previously to dedicate the kind of time and dedication a singular relationship would mandate.
Hargitt, however…
“I just told you that if you were interested, that would be reason enough for me to stop and court you…” But ‘time to think’ was promising and Jakkoa knew there was likely little to gain from pushing tonight, so instead of elaborating or challenging Hargitt’s initial presumption, he smiled. “But, for now I think you are right. Some time to rest and think would do us both well. Your body still has healing to do.”
Tomorrow would be another day, and for this night at least, Jakkoa was satisfied with the outcomes.
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