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Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2015 11:42 am
He wasted no time in throwing an arm around Otto's torso and burrowing closer. Ordinarily he would have been careful to keep a certain distance between them for Otto's comfort, but the booze had numbed his mind to most sensibilities, and there was warmth to be had.
"Maybe," Chance murmured, his eyes flickering a little before they shut, and he eased out a breath, his body relaxing. Maybe sleep was on the agenda after all. "Maybe I'm just tired of being ******** up."
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Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2015 4:44 pm
Otto wasn't sure he liked being held right now. He only let it happen to help out Chance. He could feel his brain suppressing any feelings he felt weren't normal. That he felt were wrong. Because he didn't deserve nice things, and he didn't want to accept the feelings and desires he knew he could feel inside. So he tried not to touch him; avoided the urge to hold the man's head of curly hair. "You think you're ******** up?" He asked curiously. Either Chance would finally let out what was bugging him, or he'd get tired and sleep. Both were good options. It wasn't as if he didn't know how he felt. Feeling like a total ******** up. Feeling like every inch of his mind was faulty and wrong. Hoping he cold one day worm out of his own skin and leave his body and problems behind someday.
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Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2015 4:50 pm
Chance let out a noncommittal hum that was half a laugh tinged in a strange sort of bitterness, or maybe it was just a loss of whatever he was holding onto.
"Kind offffff maybe," he said, his eyes still closed. He'd made no move to pull Otto closer, but neither had he made a move to let go either. "I don't have any feelings, or maybe I do and I just like, don't get 'em, I just go around in circles all the time making the same ******** as everrrrrrr..."
The last part came out a little singsongy.
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Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2015 5:03 pm
"I think you do have feelings. You just don't see'em for what they are. An hey.." He huffed at himself, "We all make the same mistakes. I make the same ones over and over too." "It's normal."
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Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2015 5:08 pm
He opened his eyes, just a sliver, tiredness lacing his expression, along with a faint amusement and a hint of disbelief.
"Am I normal?" Chance asked, and then laughed, though it was mostly without humor. "I don't even know what normal is anymore, except here I am, ******** up again and againnnn and I'm probably ******** up with you too, because apparently that's what I do, but I don't want to, maybe you were right, maybe I should try to sleep or something maybe maybe..."
The rest of his sentence trailed off, Chance looking slightly confused, as if he'd forgotten where he was going with it.
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Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2015 5:14 pm
It was odd, hearing Chance voice his worries that mirrored his own. However different the circumstances. What were Chance's anyway? "Did you do somethin' wrong? Or you are you just bellyachin' over past woes?"
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Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2015 5:24 pm
He hummed again, readjusting his hold. "Don't like drama," said Chance plaintively; it sounded as though he was attempting to remind himself of this. "Don't like messes, but here I am, makin' them."
A sigh escaped his lips, a jumble of words. "I don't like getting into things, I didn't think I could get into things, into people, yet here I am, ********' it all up by making friends and then I go and just sleep around, and I don't regret that, I don't regret it at all, but I don't think people see me as a good guy to be around."
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Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2015 5:32 pm
He had no advice, because he did the same things. Not really the sleeping around, although that had gotten him into trouble as well. Otto wasn't loose with his body, only because he tended to keep people at a distance to begin with. It was hard to say no when it was offered, though. "Yeah, well. If it's the people that matter sayin' that to you? You got a problem. If it's people you don't know? ******** 'em." "Unless you only imagined people are sayin' smack. Then you're your own problem."
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Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2015 5:39 pm
The last part made him laugh, in spite of himself. Chance opened his eyes again to give Otto an amused look tinged with sleepiness.
"I am my own problem," he intoned, and then laughed again, dissolving into lazy giggles, even though a small part of his brain knew that this part was at least true. He did have a habit of creating his own issues.
"Otto you are definitely not a problem, though, you are totally Otto and even if I totally don't get what you're saying, I totally like that you're saying it, so thank you Otto for being you. I like, totally feel at ease with you," he added, ducking his head down and half curling over to make himself smaller.
"Sorry," he mumbled, after a second, like an afterthought.
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Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2015 5:44 pm
He wanted to smack Chance for praising him. For telling him he was good or wasn't a problem. But Chance was drunk. He didn't know better. "S'fine. Just rest up." He breathed out, finally letting himself pet Chance's hair. Maybe it would help him sleep. Chance needed to sleep off whatever was bugging him. All his worries might feel like a faraway dream after. Or a painful hangover.
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Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2015 5:50 pm
The feel of fingers in his hair was strangely comforting. Chance's eyes flickered and then fell shut, and unconsciously he shifted closer, the warmth drawing him in.
"Resting up, resting up," he murmured drowsily, and then he had miraculously drifted off to sleep, nestled comfortably beside his friend.
Several hours later, Chance blinked blearily into consciousness, his head spinning so ferociously he thought he might be sick. A heavy pounding against his skull indicated a massive hangover, and it took him several minutes to figure out just where he was and what had happened.
And that there was someone beside him, Chance curled ********> he thought, recognizing the blonde hair, a welling sense of oh s**t growing in his stomach before he realized they were both fully clothed. It made him slightly more relieved, but other than that, the evening was fragmented and ********> Chance thought again, wondering what time it was.
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Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2015 5:56 pm
Otto had fallen asleep as Chance had stopped talking. Finally he could rest. When he did wake, it was sudden. It was in the middle of a nightmare, and the first thing he did was flinch. A flinch more like a punch. A punch to poor Chance's nose as Otto sat up in bed and yelled; "THE JELLYBEAN ARMY IS A SHAM!"
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Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2015 5:59 pm
Chance had about two seconds notice something was about to go horribly amiss before something slammed into him, and with a yelp and a squawk he fell away, clutching at his face.
"HOLY ********," he yelled, his head ringing, and then reached out, grasping Otto's shoulder.
"Otto - Otto - "
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Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2015 6:02 pm
Otto took a few moments to get his head back into the world of the living. He blinked, squinting into the room, and then at Chance. "....hi?" He spoke blearily. Mornings weren't his thing.
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Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2015 6:04 pm
His head was now in danger of falling off. Thankfully, Otto's punch had only clipped him and hadn't actually broken anything, though it might have felt differently. Chance winced at the volume of voices, one hand rubbing over his nose.
"Good morning," he said, a little hesitantly, voice muffled behind his fingers. "Uh."
And that was as far as he got, Chance attempting to remember what had happened the night before.
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