SOLO: Not IRB Approved
It was an idle weekend for Silas, and a deliberately idle one at that. He had set today aside in order to actually get off his butt and see what Cornelius wanted him to do with the Shadow Box. It sounded like a fight of some sort was going to be involved, and while he wished that he had the opportunity to dust off his fighting skills and warm up, he figured that it probably wouldn’t make that much of a difference.
After performing the usual steps to make it to his Wonder, Glitnir was unsurprised to see Cornelius waiting for him in the courthouse’s lobby. “Long time no see,” he said with just the right amount of gruffness to convey his displeasure at the delay. “And you didn’t bring a guest to distract me with this time. Am I to take this to mean that you’re ready for your trial?”
“Sorry. Life got busy again.” Glitnir scratched behind his head sheepishly. “You’ve told me absolutely nothing about what this trial is. Is there a reason you’re keeping it a secret?”
“I have told you what this trial is about. It’s a confrontation. And besides, it works best when you have no expectations going in.” Cornelius made his way towards the hallway. “Are you coming?”
“Yeah, of course.” Glitnir was glad he had his spectral ancestor to follow from place to place; his memory of the basement wasn’t the best.
Soon, the two made it to the room with the Shadow Box. Cornelius stood behind the pedestal and pulled what seemed to be a small control panel out of the back. “Take some deep breaths, and when you're ready, open the box. And hold still so it can do what it’s supposed to do.”
Without a word, Glitnir opened the box. A beam of light shone on his face for a few seconds, then switched off with a beep. A dark, thick mist began to flow from the box, gathering not too far from where he was standing. “I didn’t break it, did I?”
“Just wait,” Cornelius said, his gaze on the mist.
The mist began to pile upward till finally, a form could be made out within it, becoming clearer by the second. When it coalesced completely, another Glitnir stood there, this one in Page attire and with golden eyes. “Well, what do you know. The newest Knight of Glitnir finally decided to quit pussyfooting around and open the box.” The Page spoke with Glitnir’s voice, but with a layer of distortion added on top of it.
Glitnir stared at his doppelganger, unsure of what to make of it. “How did it do that?”
A loud stomp echoed throughout the room. “Pay attention!” When the Page was sure he had Glitnir’s attention, he continued. “That’s what good students do, right? And good teachers… except you.”
“Huh?”
The Page shifted his weight and idly swung his scale around slightly. “It’s funny how you suddenly decided you were fit to teach other people when you never made a lesson plan. You quested and dug deep for as many opinions as you could get, and then… nothing! You did absolutely nothing with them.”
“What are you talking about? How do you know what I did?” Glitnir cast a questioning look over to Cornelius, who completely ignored him.
“If someone were to ask you how you felt about killing the enemy or what you thought the best tactics in the war were, you wouldn’t even be able to come up with anything, would you?”
“That’s not true! I wouldn’t kill any enemies unless they’re a real threat!” Glitnir could feel heat rushing to his face out of indignation.
“But how would you determine that? That could mean anyone, from a devoted Lieutenant to a General that just so happens to be around. You never made a benchmark for who is dangerous. You never did anything with what you learned.”
“I… what?” The onslaught left Glitnir bewildered. “I did things with what I learned! I…” He felt a heart-sinking sensation when he realized he was coming up empty.
“Yeah? Nothing, right? Thought so. You never decided your real stances on anything. When you talked to that senshi girl, all you could tell her was that no one really had a complete picture of the war. Let’s face it. You’re an okay teacher, but a shitty guide, and a guide is what people really need. Otherwise, you’re just blindly regurgitating facts that people could get from anyone.” The doppelganger took one step closer to his original.
In response, Glitnir stepped back. “Stop that! Who do you think you are, saying these things about me? And why do you look like me?”
“Isn’t it obvious? I
am you. In fact, I’m
more than you! I’m everything you think you can hide or deny!” The copy took one more menacing step towards Glitnir. “You and I, we’re inadequate for the purposes we want to be designed for. We can’t teach others, and we sure as hell can’t guide them. In this respect, we’re both still lost little Pages.”
“How dare you! You can’t be me! I’d never say anything like this!” Glitnir clenched his scale tightly, unsure if the confrontation would come to blows or not.
The other Glitnir gave a harsh chuckle. “That’s right! Say it again! ‘I’d never say anything like this,’ huh? Of course you wouldn’t! You’d rather lie to yourself and pretend you have everything under control than admit that maybe you haven’t thought everything out!”
“I, I’m not…” Glitnir’s grip on the chain of his scale became white-knuckled, and he shouted the fateful words:
“You’re not me!”The harsh chuckle from before turned into a wicked, coarse laugh.
A reddish-black mist began to surround the doppelganger, growing thicker by the second. “That’s right! If I have my way, I’ll be me, not you! Let me show you where denying your true self gets you, Page!”
The mist thickened and built upon itself, then shot outward and upward into a column. When it dissipated, a monstrous parody of the Page that had been there before stood on a scale platform suspended from the ceiling by chains. The creature was humanoid, with pale reddish skin. The armor it wore was cracked in numerous places, as was the white half of a mask on the right side of its face. The left half of its face was nothing more than a black void from which a golden eye glowed.
A heavily distorted voice echoed throughout the room. “
I am a Shadow, the True Self. I hope you studied hard for this lesson, because I won’t hesitate to give you a failing grade!”
For a good few moments, Glitnir stood and stared at the Shadow, stunned. He turned to Cornelius briefly. “I-Is this supposed to happen?” he stuttered, and received no response. That was just enough time for the Shadow to conjure up a giant chain and swing it at him, landing a solid blow that knocked him flat.
“No requesting help from the audience! This is between you and me, Page!” The Shadow produced more chains, and they arched and waved around him like snakes.
With a grunt, Glitnir pulled himself to his feet. “All right, fine… if it’s a fight you want, it’s a fight you’ll get.” He pushed down on his scale to activate his magic, unsure of what effect it would have. Sure, it seemed to affect youma like it did people, but considering the magnificent backfire that had occurred when he had tried to direct it to the youma train, he was wary (and fairly sure that Cornelius would give him a great dressing-down if it was accidentally diverted to him).
The monster faltered briefly, then laughed. “Ha! You really think that using your magic on an extension of yourself is going to get you somewhere? Oh, sure, it’ll get you somewhere, all right. Welcome to hell!”
The chains began to shine brightly, and Glitnir felt the air around him grow thick. All at once, a deluge of thoughts surged through his mind. It wasn’t bad enough that this monster was probably right about his utter failure to come to a stance on anything he had done research on; he was aware of a great many other wrongs as well. He was too hard on all kinds of people who didn’t deserve it, Ezra included. He was absolutely terrible at comforting people; Ezra had said so himself and that senshi who threw him aside at the train station was a prime example. “Just wait, it’ll go away on its own and you’ll feel better?” What kind of bullshit was that? Even if it was true, that was no way to comfort someone faced with all their guilt and sins.
The air felt like it was pressing down on him. The heaviness, combined with his racing thoughts, slowly brought him to his knees. The Shadow was right; he could not be the guide people wanted. He could barely be an adequate teacher. And yet…
The Shadow gave another maniacal laugh. “How’s it feel to get hit with your own magic, huh? Sure sucks, doesn’t it? Makes you feel like s**t, doesn’t it? Now you know how that guy felt! But don’t worry, it’ll pass, right?!”
“S… stop,” Glitnir said weakly, struggling to stay upright and becoming increasingly aware that the Shadow was extending chains towards him. “I don’t…”
Before he could say more, the chains coiled around him, binding him thoroughly. “You don’t what?” The Shadow yanked Glitnir closer after he was fully bound, watching him struggle and increasing the pressure.
“I can’t… this…” Words were not coming to Glitnir easily. He was deeply concerned that he would leave this battle with more than a few bruises. He could have his bones broken from the pressure of the chains. The fear only worsened when one chain slid around his neck.
“You’ll deny me to the end, huh?” The Shadow slowly tightened the chain around Glitnir’s neck. “Well, that’s what it’ll be for you: the end!”
Just when Glitnir was sure that he was about to die in one way or another, a loud beep came from the direction of the Shadow Box. The Shadow slowly broke back up into mist and dispersed, causing Glitnir to tumble to the ground, hacking and sputtering. After frantically trying to catch his breath, he splayed out on the floor, feeling throbbing pain in every inch of his body.
The Shadow Box shut, and Cornelius shut the drawer containing the control panel. He walked over to Glitnir and crouched down beside him, offering a hand. “Do you think you’ll be able to stand?”
Through wheezing, Glitnir was able to say, “I guess. He didn’t break anything, so… I guess I’ll get up, just give me a bit.”
Cornelius nodded. “When you are ready, come see me out in the hallway. If you take longer than five minutes, I’ll come back in and check on you.”
“Okay.” Cornelius left, and Glitnir was left lying on the floor. As much as he wanted to just pass out right there and just sleep for a while, he knew that Cornelius had important feedback for him. He would get up and meet the older man eventually, but until then, he would stare at the stone ceiling in a deep daze.
After precisely five minutes of laying around, Glitnir pulled himself up and hobbled out of the room to meet Cornelius. “Okay, I’m up. What’ve you got to tell me?”
Cornelius sighed and put a ghostly hand on Glitnir’s shoulder, apparently not noticing the subsequent wince. “You didn’t prepare for this at all, did you?” Before Glitnir could open his mouth to say something, he continued. “It’s all right. It’s difficult to prepare to confront yourself, whether you know what’s coming or not. Almost no one wins against their Shadow on the first try. Not even I stood a chance against mine in my Squire days.”
“That’s comforting, I guess,” Glitnir mumbled, unsure of how much it was actually comforting.
“Here’s a tip: the Shadow becomes stronger the more you reject it. While it’s programmed to never actually kill its original, injuries can still happen, and that’s why there’s an emergency stop button on that control panel.” Cornelius traced one of the leftover chain-shaped bruises on Glitnir’s arm. “Now that the initial meeting is over, you have a new mission. Explore yourself, reflect upon what your Shadow told you, and when you think you’re ready to face yourself again, come back here. I can’t tell you how to win the battle against yourself; that’s entirely up to you. Just know that you can’t brute-force your way through it.”
“Stop that,” Glitnir half-whined, pulling his arm away from Cornelius’s pokey fingers. He was feeling immensely thankful for the oncoming cold weather that would allow him to wear long sleeves to cover the bruises. He sighed, covering his arm and wincing again. “That’s a pretty tough mission, but… I accept it. After hearing all that, I can’t just let things stay as they are.”
“It sounds like you’re off to a good start already,” Cornelius said. He nodded towards the exit from the basement. “Go. Rest, heal your wounds. I have faith that, when you come back, you will be a stronger person, and ready for a rematch.”
“You do?” Glitnir was honestly surprised to hear the vote of confidence from his ancestor, especially given what had just happened.
“Yes. It takes more than having your hidden darkness revealed for me to lose faith in someone. I operated the Shadow Box and had to see a great many people’s Shadows, you know. After a while, what you see stops being shocking, and you can accept people’s flaws with them. In fact, showing someone that you accept them even after what you have seen is a great help in getting them to accept themselves.” Cornelius gave Glitnir a light shove forward, which pulled a yelp of pain out of him. “Sorry. Really, go rest. You need it.”
“Thanks. And stop touching me.”
[Glitnir visited his wonder on October 18th. He can return on November 1st.][Word Count: 2373. Per the new rules, 4x solo bonus! Yahoo!]
