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He had not paid twitter any mind, but the cafeteria was a common destination for Kostya. Blankly, he stared at the box before approaching it, and was promptly offended as it taunted him about his hygiene.

With the showers inactive, he did what he could to stay clean, and that meant a lot of scavenged soap being put to good use. It was especially depressing, because Mimsy never used quite enough to make a dent in what he collected.

Even when he left it in places she would encounter, such as on her journals or beneath her pillow.

...So, so depressing.

Nonetheless, if this box said he was unclean, it likely had detection methods that were superior. Perhaps he had simply become so unclean that he no longer noticed. Horrified by the prospect, he collected a sample of Old Spice and headed into the box.

Upon closing the door behind him, Konstantin stared sceptically at the posters. Did he truly need to be shirtless for this to be effective? Instructions were instructions, he supposed. Starting from his coat, the Russian began pulling off articles of clothing, folding them, and setting them down. Coat, scarf, long sleeved shirt, normal shirt, undershirt.

It was clear he was used to being prepared with layers.

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What was left for the ladies was a distinctly average figure. He had been cut, at some point in his life, but he had slacked, and it showed in the place where his abs used to be, and in the thinness of his arms. His pants were not belted as tight as they should have been, and revealed a strip of boxers above their waist.

It was fortunate for him that his pants were of the cargo variety, and therefore were quite baggy.

Konstantin applied the deodorant as instructed, flexing to little avail, his face a blank mask all the while. After that, he quietly redressed himself and strode out.

Huh. He didn't feel any different.

Candace was surprised to see Kostya. Huh..this would be interesting. What was he like under all those layers? It wasn't something she had ever wondered before but hey it would be interesting to know.

Huh..

Kostya
Cleanliness: 6/10 I feel like it's difficult for anyone to be perfectly clean right now.
Good hair: 5/10
Nice shave: 4/10
Rugged nature: 3/10 Being Russian = automatically rugged in some way.
Good abs: 2/10
Charisma: 2/10 I like you but that stone face thing was unsettling.
Jailbait: /10 Why is this even an option?
Hott butt: /10 Can't see it )=
Sexiness: 4/10
Overall hotness: 4/10

She could see where he would be very attractive to a girl but..that girl wasn't her. Kostya had potential. Luckily Deus was pretty good at forcing people into a good shape. You go, Deus. But that flex and the lack of expression on his face kind of ruined it for her.

It was a little creepy.

Candace wasn't sure why she was jotting down notes. Would anyone even read these? Whatever, she would do it anyway.

And then Ryan showed up.

Ryan
Cleanliness: 0/10
Good hair: 3/10
Nice shave: 0/10
Rugged nature: 0/10
Good abs: 0/10 Didn't take his hoodie off, can't see.
Charisma: 0/10 Also can't follow instructions.
Jailbait: 5/10 Now I see why this was an option.
Hott butt: 0/10
Sexiness: 0/10
Overall hotness: 0/10

Can't judge what you don't see.

Nevada blinked as smaller male hunter entered the booth, her chin in her hand as he went about his business. Overall, he was totally her type...minus the height.

If she said she had a type at least...She didn't think she did but well...



Then Ryan came in and he got a very sad frown from Nevada.

She couldn't score what she couldn't see after all.

So that's what those two had been muttering about. Sound traveled pretty well down in the basement, not enough to get the full conversation and nefarious plots of two his neighbors but Milo had caught wind of something. Something about abs. Not to mention, that tweet from America. So much sense was being made as he eyed the rather large booth. And the deodorant. And back at the booth. And then back at the free stuff. He knew nothing good was coming from this (on to you all!), but it was free and was better than just using soap....

Milo casually walked over with his hands in his pockets, startled at first with the loud voice that came from it (telling him he smelled similar pure gasoline, like a burnt turd covered in hair... and that he needed to be sprayed with a hose to get the sick away), before promptly ignoring it and grabbing one of the products a bit at random. Apparently he had grabbed the Axe, he realized as he stepped into the tiny booth. And then squinted at the signs. And then grinned.

Oh, how glad he was with wearing the outfit he had on today; a few layers with a nice vest and a long sleeve shirt with a tie - they were washed after far too long, so he felt like wearing them. After he removed his coat and carefully undid his tie, he got to the other layers. There were also so many buttons to attend to, which he did with diligence and painstakingly slow speeds. One. Button. At. A. Time. He was humming the Gokaiger theme song too and nodding his head to the beat as he got undressed.

Really, it was the most he could do on short notice. If he had known ahead of time the extent of this all, he would have come like this. So, he would at least comply and take off his shirt. ('cause why not? He had nothing to be ashamed of). And spray himself with the Axe - chocolate? really? - before he posed in front of the mirror.

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And then a few more nerdy ones (take your pick) and an ore sanjou before he collected his clothes in a heap and made his merry way out of the booth.

Candace felt a presence looming closed to her and looked up to find the blonde girl beside her was looking at her card. She blinked, just letting the girl see her scores because why the ******** not? It's not like they were meant to be secret from each other, right?

The sound of someone else arriving made her look up. She didn't know this boy..he looked young. What was he humming? She couldn't figure it out. Candace blinked, tilting her head and just watching him. Whyyy was he..?

...Wow.

What the.

What the hell was he--what. These poses. What is even.

Was that a power rangers pose?

Cleanliness: 8/10
Good hair: 7/10
Nice shave: 10/10 Only because I didn't see even a single piece of body hair.
Rugged nature: 0/10
Good abs: 8/10
Charisma: 6/10 He was excited, I guess.
Jailbait: 10/10 This category was made for you, wasn't it?
Hott butt: 2/10
Sexiness: 0/10 I feel uncomfortable describing this boy as sexy after what I just witnessed.
Overall hotness: 3/10

What the hell was that noise? Candace furrowed her brow and leaned over to see past Maebe, finding the noise was coming from Mimsy until it almost completely stopped.

She turned over one of her cards and wrote across the back of it:

Poke her to see if she's still functioning.

Nevada blinked at Milo's little moment before snorting a bit.

He was cute...in a nerdy sort of kid way?

His score overall got a, cute kind of remark.

She yawned a bit, looking over at Mimsy's loud sounds that went from that...to a dying sort of look.

Did the poor girl witness something they didn't?

Jordan's expression held a certain amount of skepticism as he looked at the odor-meter. Given, there were a lot of people on the island currently not maintaining immaculate personal hygiene, and someone might have decided to do something about it. But the very specific instructions about shirtlessness, standing still, and flexing were a little odd. He took a quick glance inside the booth and noted that there was a fairly sizable discrepancy between the apparent dimensions of the booth and the room available inside, and that the mirror had that slightly odd, dark tint that he associated with mirrored windows rather than standard mirrors. Suspicious.

On the other hand, this setup had taken a great deal of time, effort, ingenuity, and probably bribery, depending on who was behind it, and God only knew that everyone was bored with the power down and minimal portal access. You took your entertainment where you could get it, or you made your own. And it was just shirtlessness. He had nothing to be ashamed of.

He picked the Old Spice, because seriously, Axe, ew, and stepped into the booth, pulling the curtain behind him. Free deodorant was good anyway. Short, cold-water showers were seriously awful.



The shirt came off to reveal a lean, wiry-strong build that had been nicely strengthened by two years of swinging a heavy weapon around daily. He made sure to flex obligingly and do a slow turn after applying the deodorant, letting the mirror have a good view of the tattoos on his back. Before he put his shirt back on to leave, he grinned at the mirror and lifted one hand in a little wave. He was pretty sure that his guess was correct - and anyway, if it wasn't, nobody would see that.

Candace was actually very surprised to see Jordan. Very surprised. Good choice, Old Spice trumped Axe any day of the week. But she was still surprised to see him show up to this considering how terribly subtle this entire thing was. Even just seeing America's tweet had made her suspicious.

..He had a really awesome body though. Good job, Jordan. As Harrison's friend it was basically her job to judge his fiances, so this wasn't a challenge for her at all. The only thing that made her hesitate was the scar that ran down Jordan's front. As she stared at it her smile fell slightly. Candace rubbed her lips together and cleared her throat, looking away to write down some scores for her friend.

Jordan
Cleanliness: 9/10
Good hair: 10/10
Nice shave: 9/10
Rugged nature: 7/10 He's a Sun, it's almost a requirement.
Good abs: 10/10
Charisma: 10/10
Jailbait: 0/10
Hott butt: 9/10
Sexiness: 5/10 It's hard to call a friend sexy when I don't look for his sexy side.
Overall hotness: 10/10

That looked good. It felt kind of weird to label Jordan as sexy, not because he wasn't attractive but...well..it was Jordan. He was the calm and collected type, he wasn't sexy in public. She looked up in time to watch him grin and wave, smirking at the hint. Ah. He knew the whole time. She knew he wasn't that stupid.

A sigh beside her made her look to the blonde beside her again, raising a brow. Should she burst her bubble? It was usually pretty fun..but she didn't want to steal Jordan's thunder in doing it himself someday.

Instead Candace gently pat Maebe's head. There, there. He's gone now.