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 Posted: Fri Sep 07, 2012 9:16 pm
At the comment on his accent Rep stopped his relaxed rambling almost immediately, looking for just an instant as if he'd been slapped. Sometimes he forgot about it and then someone would remind him that there was a good chance most of the things he said went over people's head.
He wanted to agree he didn't think Jerry was like that, but that would ultimately mean he'd be doomed to be the doormat to women with an ounce of confidence. But the accent thing had stung. He settled for something he couldn't misunderstand, a simple grunt of affirmation as he took another drink.
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Posted: Fri Sep 07, 2012 10:24 pm
As Rep withdrew, Jerry's brows furrowed and mouth moved, silently replaying what he had said, "S-sorry, it's... been a while since I had a drink, ahahahaha. Er. On the beach that time doesn't count."
He pursed his lips, watching the liquid swirl in the bottle shyly.
"I Just mean... I mean, the crazy-azy-aziest part is I still love them. Sasha just... out grew me, I guess. I don't know but I've spent my whole experience here fighting that look she had and... she hates me. She's been.. been trying to get rid of me for a while and I'm just so stupid... I know she's going through... through things. But she's not alone, dammit. I could help her. B-but she hates me and I d-don't know why."
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Posted: Sat Sep 08, 2012 7:09 am
At the apology Rep seemed to sufficiently relax to speak again. "Awright." Not so very long ago any and all talk of loving anyone would have gone over Rep's head - as far as he'd been concerned, love had been a weakness, just a trap for people too stupid to avoid it. He couldn't dismiss it any more.
He took another swig of the drink, feeling temporarily dizzy before he remembered the alcohol volume in Sambuca and realised why. Shaking his head did nothing to restore clarity. He approved, it was doing its job.
"Well like..well man." he frowned, making an almost pitiful attempt to speak clearly despite the accent and alcohol. "I don't know what I'd have done if like..if I made like that..commitment. And then it wasn't ******** returned." Just the memory of the training fields before the horseman assault made the old anxieties he'd felt then slink back. Jerry got a sympathetic frown. "I couldn't ******** handle it. I'd just.." the temptation was there to lie, but the alcohol had done its work, and the truth didn't seem as embarrassing as it might have normally "I'd just keep ******** trying I guess and hope I could change their mind. Because I'd like, probably feel like it was my fault. " Rejection was one of the things he had never been able to handle in the slightest, even the idea of Jerry's situation - though nothing to do with him at all, made him furious - if there was one thing Rep believed, it was that there was nothing so wasteful and crass as love treated as disposable. In the past he'd kept coming back no matter how many times promises of needing no one else gave way to addiction, and every time hurt just as much. "I dunno man, sometimes I just think women as a whole are ******** all twisted up and wrong, they don't understand what s**t means, how ******** much is on the line, they don't have the ******** capacity for emotions we do. They are weak."
He tried to stave off the sudden venomous feeling of loathing by altering the line of the conversation a little. "But aye. Sometimes people just hate you no matter what you ******** do. They make up their mind and that's it, and all you can do if you want to stop getting ******** burned, is try and stay away the ******** away from them and find the people who like, don't. Even if its ******** hard to do." He gave Jerry a weary look. "People here have their own ********' problems I guess. They don't want ours."
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Posted: Sat Sep 08, 2012 7:10 pm
Jerry's expression contorted between miserable and enraged, his grip on the box with the flute tightening before he flipped it open to stare at the parts. "I honestly thought... I thought she was... I thought I had found someone like me, y'know? We wanted the same things. And... and music, she valued music as much as I did and... and I thought we could make music together, you know? I'm stupid is what it is. An idiot. Always lettin' myself fall into these situations. I don't... I don't MEAN for it to happen it just... I don't know what happened to her. I want to help but... but she... she made it clear she hated... she hated what she was before. Hated what I am. I don't know. I don't know if she ever.... ever really... even liked me. I'd never even seen her naked," He added as a miserable after thought in a mutter.
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Posted: Sat Sep 08, 2012 7:50 pm
"Aye. I know what you mean. I thought she was ******** like you too. Like with the musicy thing and the flute and the everything. But she's not. That was like...like well..." he made a little shape with his hands. "Like the pretty little shell. And on the inside though there was like... this pure mad mutant insect thing inside like waiting to get out." He blinked, alcohol really taking its toll. "Like.. like one of those ******** mantis things. Out to eat their man's head, and not in the good ******** way either."
"I think you like, dodged a ******** bullet with the naked thing, but I can like, see where you might maybe like be annoyed about that. All the ******** effort for nothing. She just used you while she was pretending or some s**t, women are good at that, they can get a guy by the balls and use him and then drop him so fast." He shook his head dismally. "Sucks man, you don't deserve it. You are a good guy. Most of the time anyway, when you aren't singing mean ******** songs about me."
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Posted: Mon Sep 10, 2012 12:25 am
Jerry sniffed, putting the flute down again because it was too painful to look at, and instead buried himself in bottle. When he came up for air again he shook his head, "S'not FAIR. I do everything they want me to! I try my best to... to fulfill what they want from me but it's never enough! They always go runnin' to HIM. I d-don't get it!"
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Posted: Mon Sep 10, 2012 5:42 am
"Power, its all....like its like power right? You like, well you need to be badder than him. You havta..not give them what they want, not do what they want. Haveto make them work for it, keeps them interested." Words came so much easier with a bit - well, a lot - of alcohol between them and him.
"And if ye aren't hardcore enough to do that man, well then you have to take him on. Show him, they are your ladies. He's only a ********' like doctor, you are Jerry." Even progressing to proper drunkeness there was a momentary twinge that this might have been a bad suggestion.
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Posted: Mon Sep 10, 2012 9:25 am
"I hate him," Jerry snarled bitterly, "I hate him and his stupid... logical... graceful greying patterns," He wove his hands about his head and nearly dumped scotch on himself. "You know... you know what she said? She said she was runnin' off to him and... and even if she was just being mean it was MAN I mean... ******** him! Only not really just... aaarrrrgggg."
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Posted: Mon Sep 10, 2012 9:36 am
"Whatta ******** b***h. That's not ******** cool at all. You don't do that s**t to a guy, makin' him like..feel inferior and all that s**t. Ace was totally right man. Guess like..I guess like maybe she wants the one thing you can't give her, a ******** promo...promshim"
He shook his head irritably, annoyed on Jerry's behalf. He'd always had very clear feelings on rejection in any form, and a woman rejecting a man - a fellow sun no less - was inexcusable and cause enough for a rant. "And aye, ******** him an' his smarmy smirk and s**t man. Called me a dog. A dog. He can't have everything. He's just... he's just a big ******** nerd." He eyed Jerry thoughtfully and waved the empty bottle. "An' he's not even got the good ********' grace to be an awkward one like you."
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Posted: Mon Sep 10, 2012 9:47 am
Rep was quick to badmouth Sasha, but even in Jerry's booze-cushioned mind, it wasn't her fault.
She was going through something. He wanted her to need him. To want him for help.
But no, she had dropped him like a bad habit without even giving him an opportunity to *try*.
"Before... before she was captured, I didn't shave for a few days hoping she'd just.... y'know... help me with it. I thought she liked doing it. She certainly liked doing it for HIM, but not me. I thought it was intim-inim-intimate. Am I just... just not allowed a little... little ******** intimacy?? He's n-not going to tell her anything anyway. Not unless she crawls on his l-lap for s-story time."
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Posted: Mon Sep 10, 2012 10:24 am
Rep tended to be unforgiving with a lot of things, but for whatever reason he couldn't extend his definitions of manliness to things done out of desperation for affection. It was hard to judge someone when he knew he wouldn't have been far off that level himself had things gone less fortunately for him.
"I dunno man, your luck...is just ********' terrible. I don't see why they have to ******** you over every single time, didn't look like you were doing anything wrong." He sighed heavily. "Women man, I dunno why they do the s**t they do. S..s'like her too, went to all the things that were ******** terrible for her." Almost all of his past dealings with women had been disastrous, but thankfully only once as invested as Jerry seemed to get every time.
"If I'm totally honest, I'm glad to be out of that whole ******** game."
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Posted: Mon Sep 10, 2012 10:33 am
"She called my music stupid," Jerry mumbled, as though that had been a more painful blow than the one to his manhood. "I j-just... I don't get it. I don't get it at all. They d-don't want nice guys who... who'll treat them like princesses. They... they really want a scar-eyed b-b-b*****d to sexually molest them."
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Posted: Mon Sep 10, 2012 10:42 am
Rep nodded "Aye that's pretty much it man. They want a guy at home to pay the bills and tell them their arse looks good in their outfit, they want to be in charge. But in bed that princess bullshit pisses them off they want a b*****d real manly like, someone who is going to tell them what their ******** medicine is and make them take it. Take control away from them. That's how their brain works." He gave a fairly innocent look to the ceiling.
"And it looks to me man, like by setting yourself up as that first guy that you've kinna put yourself in a place for disappointment. Cause like, you just want to be the prince. And all the princesses are whores."
As if to soften this pronouncement he added. "Your music seems pretty ******** good to me man. It's a ******** skill. And most women want a guy who is good with his hands at least?"
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Posted: Mon Sep 10, 2012 10:45 am
"Aaarrrrrgggggggggh" Jerry flopped back to lay on the floor with the bottle on his chest, one hand covering his face, "I hate him I hate him somuchI'mnotafraidofhim."
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Posted: Mon Sep 10, 2012 10:49 am
Rep smirked with just a little bit of mockery. "Y'sound pretty afraid of him man, if you are letting him take away all your women without doing anything about it. Taking yer women and taking your pride. You didn't have a ******** problem telling me how you felt about the old woman thing."
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