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 Posted: Tue Jul 03, 2012 8:50 pm
Bix was glad to see the feeling was reciprocated, at least that feeling. When she asked to talk to him about something he suddenly felt a flip in his stomach. he wasn't sure if he was good or bad. That sort of precursor could be to anything really. But generally you only asked permission to discuss if it was going to be some sort of.... thing.
Good or bad.
Bix nodded ,"Sure you can always talk to me." He then clamped his mouth shut, remembering his last rambling meeting with her. Not again. He was learning!
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Posted: Tue Jul 03, 2012 9:24 pm
Oh goodness.
Molly…now had the floor…and that absolutely frightened her. Maybe…maybe she just shouldn’t say anythi—
No…no. No that wouldn’t be fair to Bix…and that wouldn’t be fair to her. Molly tried channeling her talk with Candace. Candace reaffirmed that she needed to focus on herself…and Molly wasn’t even really sure who she was at this moment. This confusion, coupled with the confusion and hesitation she experienced on that night out with Bix, had her thinking for a while. She needed to do the right thing…even if it might not have been pleasant. Bix deserved better, she told herself.
The mist trainee licked her lips and opened her mouth before closing it. She took a deep breath, and then let it out. “It’s just…well…I’ve been thinking…a lot…um…a lot of things, like the talk I had with Miss Candace about my sister…and then…um…our outing the other night…” She paused, her brows furrowing. “…I like you Bix, I really do. You’re very kind, and sweet, and so, so thoughtful…I’ve never met a young man like you before! You’re amazing and…well…out of this world, really.” She smiled sheepishly at him. “…I…I think…I should have um…you know…kissed you back…but…I couldn’t…I just…I locked up…and I can’t explain why and I’m so, so sorry…there’s something wrong with me, I’m sure.”
She trailed off. “…It’s just…everything came at me I think…the fact that…for the first time in twenty-one years…I’m alone. The only person I need to take care of right now…is me…and I…I have no idea how to take care of me. I’ve been living for my sister for so long, and now that I don’t have her, I’m lost. I need to…find myself I think. Gosh…I hate it…I hate saying this…it sounds so…so selfish.” Molly made a horrified face. “But it’s just…I feel like until I can figure myself out…it’s not fair to try to figure…you and I out…” She paused again, biting her lip. “…I mean…I know as Hunters we don’t have a lot of time…I get that…I really do…but at the same time…to become so involved with another like that…emotionally…I…it was too fast for me. I don’t know what to do with…it…and I…I don’t think I can…try to rough it out…I need…time.”
She hesitantly glanced up at him.
“…I’m sorry…um…sorry for that and…if I rambled…uh…”
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Posted: Tue Jul 03, 2012 9:45 pm
Bix listened, the heat rising in his face. Why was he embarassed? Well maybe it was the subtle rejection, the rejection that wasn't quite rejection. He understood, he really did. He was hearing what she was saying and he, as a logical human being, could hear what she said. But as a guy who'd for the first time pursued someone and had it been somewhat reciprocated, it hurt a little. It hurt for now.
"Don't apologize." He wanted to start his own explanation, his own ramble. "There's nothing wrong with you Molly. Never think that, okay? You're wonderful and way too attractive and... you're so damn sweet." He wouldn't say a 'but'. he wouldn't tell her it hurt him. Maybe it was time he took a page from her book and just nodded his head and gave an uneasy smile because he knew that's what would make her rest a little easier.
"I understand." Bix wanted to roll over but that wasn't very supportive. He had told her before, in his own ramble, to not worry about the 'us' thing but it hadn't been totally true. He still really liked her and had only barely been given a chance before it was too much.
He'd been too aggressive? Not aggressive enough? Was he just too nice? Dozens of 'just a friend's from his years in school pretty much solidifed it in his fragile ego. He couldn't act like a mopey s**t though. Not for Molly. Even now she was being sweet, being honest.
"I really like you." Bix said again. "But.. if you need time that's okay." Was he supposed to move on? Should he wait? "I just want you to know that I like you and... if your ready or when. Please maybe tell me? I don't.. I'm sorry. Right now I guess I don't know how to shut off.. liking you?"
Bix's watched her in the dark, the moonlight catching only the thinnest sliver of red in his eyes. "I just don't want to lose out on a great girl, is all. I hope we can be friends still. Like before? When we had that picnic and planned things?" He still wanted to be able to be around her though it probably wouldn't help his problem. He could be manageable around her, right?
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Posted: Mon Jul 09, 2012 9:06 am
Molly didn’t feel all that better after she got it off her chest, honestly. She didn’t. Now there was just the worry of hurting Bix and…disappointing him. Which she also felt like she would have done if she had tried going to keep going on the path that they were, which made her think that she couldn’t have won either way.
The young woman went red as he called her attractive and sweet. “…Uh…th…thanks…?” She squeaked, but tried to smile as he said he understood. Did he really? That made her feel a bit better…hopefully he really did understand where she was coming from. That she had needed to do this for not only her, but him as well. It was the first, most major thing Molly had stood for on her own without being told to do it, and within itself was a major victory…but it came with its consequences. Everything did. Molly snapped out of her thoughts as Bix spoke again, listening to him attentively. She nodded her head. “I…I know.” She murmured, “I…I’m really flattered…I’ve never had such a wonderful person like you like me like that before.”
Her cheeks flared a bit more red, and nodded her head again. “…Thank you for everything, Bix…really, I mean it. You make my time here at Deus brighter…happier.” Her smiled widened a bit. “I promise I will…but Bix…? Don’t wait for me, either, okay?” She tried to smile encouragingly. “You never know when you’ll find someone who could the the one for you…and I don’t want you to miss out on that person because you’re waiting on me…so don’t wait, okay? Promise me you won’t wait. Life is…too short to miss out on the good things.”
At his next concern, Molly reached out to place a hand on his fore arm encouragingly. “Oh, goodness, we’ll always, always be friends!” She stated firmly. “I never want to stop being your friend, or spending time with you…and I still would love to go through the list we made together…if that’s alright with you?”
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Posted: Mon Jul 09, 2012 3:16 pm
Bix had a lump in his throat. He wasn't going to cry or .. well anything like that.. but it made him feel lousy. He knew she wasn't malicious and he knew that she probably meant everything she was saying. He just had his hopes, lofty and unrealistic as they were, and they had just crumbled.
"I don't know about the one." Bix laughed but it sounded a bit sour. "I don't know if I believe in that." He didn't want to hurt her feelings with his negative tone and tried to pick it back up, be more positive. "But.. well I just hope maybe in the future we can try it out. Maybe. Because I'd hate to miss out on a really great girl like you." Did that mean he was going to wait? Well, no, not necessarily. But Molly probably would have a bit of a free pass with him in the future. There would be some wondering part of his brain, some tiny nugget of hope, and it would always be there. Even if that sounded mushy, impulsive and melodramatic.
Molly touched is arm and reassured their friendship and Bix did smile just a little. "Well obviously we will. Some of my things are on that list too right?"
He took a breath, tried to push the tightness in his chest away, and only halfway succeeded. It was a start. He scooted closer but not invasively. Bix took Molly's hand with his and tangled her fingers in his own. He wasn't trying to woo her but he'd gotten serious. "We're friends. And if you ever need me or need anything or... need advice. Please come to me. I know how you think you are inconveniencing people or whatever but... You know I care, for real, and even if it's some other guy issue. I still want to be here for you, okay?"
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Posted: Mon Jul 09, 2012 4:00 pm
“Awww.” Molly cooed to him. “Don’t say that, Bix. Anything is possible. I mean….look at us! We’re fighting evil with glowy weapons that talk! I couldn’t imagine that in my wildest dreams, and yet here we are…” The young woman looked a bit…exasperated as he said maybe. “Please promise me though, Bix, that you’ll pursue someone else if she…or he--because if that's what makes you happy, that's more than alright too--captures your heart okay? Please promise me.” Could he say no to those hazel doe eyes staring at him in the moonlight now?
“Right!” Molly nodded her head, the curls that weren’t smooshed against the blankets bouncing. She made a soft surprised sound as he took her hand and intertwined his fingers with hers, and her cheeks flared up as she stared before holding onto his hand in return. “…I…I will.” She promised with a nod, and then looked horrified at coming to Bix with guy issues. “Um…Bix…I really doubt you’ll have to worry about that anytime soon…” She paused. “…Yes…and the feeling is mutual, alright?”
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Posted: Mon Jul 09, 2012 4:10 pm
Bix sputtered immediately. "HE?!" He actually coughed and choked a little. Yep. Girls thought he was gay. HE KNEW IT. Bix gave her a very srs bsns face. "Those eyes won't work on me when you call me gay, Miss Molly." He looked dead pan. Poor ego shattered, Bix.
At least the break in emo-feels let him feel even the slightest bit better about the conversation. After a few beats he sagged again, the fight gone from him about what she said.
"Alright." But Bix didn't know if he really would go to her with his problems. He just... didn't know. Time would be his friend on this one.
"Now roll over. Time for sleep." He squeezed her hand.
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Posted: Mon Jul 09, 2012 4:16 pm
“…What eyes?” Molly blinked at him innocently, and then looked horrified. “I was not calling you…that Bix!” She gasped. “I’m just keeping an open mind, that’s all, and you still haven’t promised me yet!” She looked very serious to hear the answer on that one.
“…Roll over?” Molly blinked. But she could sleep fine just like this! Maybe Bix didn’t want her looking at him as they settled down to sleep though…
…
That made sense.
Molly squeezed his hand briefly in return and then released it. “Okay.” She agreed amiably, and then rolled over so that her back was to him, snuggling under her blankets some more. Hopefully this was alright now.
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Posted: Mon Jul 09, 2012 4:26 pm
Bix closed the distance between them and slipped his arm around her waist. One of his arms slid on top of hers and his fingers met hers again. She was easy to spoon, a good size for the lean young man, so he tucked his legs into hers and tangled their ankles together. Bix didn't give her a chance to argue or even ask.
"I promise I won't do anything." He chuckled. "Just.. it's nice to have company sometimes and since we had that talk I thought maybe you'd trust me not to molest you." Another laugh. Bix had his head tucked a bit against the back of Molly's shoulder.
"Unless you wanna be molested than that's fine too... " before she could tense or run he just laughed stupidly and squeezed her. "Just kidding!"
Yes he was flushed, blushing even, but knowing they were friends made this easier to do. As long as she didn't run for the hills. Bix settled a bit and then resettled. He wasn't sure he wouldn't actually sleep much. Mostly because he still felt like an idiot. He'd probably lay here and analyze everything he'd ever done with her, then analyze anything he'd ever seen her do, then try to plan to woo her back into his affections, but in the end he'd just be the guy who couldn't sleep and did nothing about it.
After a stretch of quiet and finding his own comfortable position, he murmured into her hair with closed eyes. "Comfortable?"
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Posted: Mon Jul 09, 2012 7:27 pm
Before Molly tensed? Too late, Molly tensed as soon as the arm went around her waist and there was a lean, warm form snug up against her backside. The young woman squeaked, immediately flushing red as she laid there stiff in his arms. Molly may have looked even more alarmed at the suggestion of being molested, and relaxed only a little as soon as Bix assured her he wasn’t about to.
Still, the young woman stayed tensed, afraid to relax, as if she’d upset this new position some how. She stared at the wall straight ahead a bit wide eyed, trying to get accustomed to this feeling of being…the little spoon, and of the warmth of a young man against her back. Never been in this position before, nope! She did not know what do with herself.
“Mm…mhm!” The young woman squeaked back a bit nervously. Did she really mean it at this moment? No…but she’d deal. Maybe Bix wouldn’t be the only one not sleeping tonight.
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Posted: Mon Jul 09, 2012 7:50 pm
"It's not comfortable if you don't relax." He muttered. He was at least staying true to his word. His hands stayed put and he barely moved except for breathing. "I can feel you, you're like hugging a super curvy steel beam." Bix laughed a little.
"I'll let go if you want... but.. don't you want to find yourself or whatever? Shouldn't you learn how to relax first?" He wasn't saying she didn't know how but really there was nothing embarrassing, weird or invasive about what was happening.
Bix, regardless of his thoughts, was actually getting sleepy now. His body seemed to settle a bit, a looseness of his muscles telling that he could slip off to sleep if he just concentrated on it. His doubting thoughts would have to wait until his first night by himself.
Just to be reassuring he squeezed her hand. "Nothing's gonna happen." It was more a generic comfort, something he'd said to his brother a thousand times when he couldn't sleep or he thought that the clothes hanger was a monster. There was that sleepy, loose twang he adopted slightly when he got too relaxed or inebriated.
Bix was close to asleep.
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