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Spamster
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Posted: Mon Feb 27, 2006 4:06 pm

Mozzarella

Leiko - wink <333.((And it is P.P.S.; Post Post Script.)

Morgan (Spamster)-- This is something I am firm on. We do influence each other. And I think it is self centred to make decisions based on the fact that I am only in this for me; though it is out human instinct, and vital for basic survival. But really.... How can you possibly feel like a good person when you are sitting in your home, upset because of something as trivial as.....anything, when people on the other side of the globe (not the other side of the universe), are counting down the moments until their villages are burned, or until they die from AIDS, or until they die from starvation? Clearly, we CAN change this; we do control it. We have seen it throughout history, time and time again. When the western world does want to make something happen, when they want to change something, they do. And this change does not start with nationwide action, it starts with individuals, and collaboration. Small acts of charity may have small results, but results they are nonetheless.

Quote:

And then there's the people that think that they're inhumanely terrible because there's people starving in another continent. Sure, that's unfortunate. Sure, it shouldn't be happening. But - honestly - that impacts my life in nearly no way, whatsoever.

I don't think I'm inhumanly terrible, I simply feel selfish for holding my trivial conflicts above human lives and immense suffering I cannot fathom. These people's lives may not have huge effects over us, but our actions and choices can change their lives.

Okay, it was a bad choice of words to say that those starving do not affect us at all. That's false, I realize that. But I can honestly say, that - in the past months (years) - I have never been truly influenced, hurt, or profoundly affected by those in starvation and poverty, aside from the occasional Geography presentation.

Here's what it comes down to for me, what do I value more: focusing on my life, and my own problems, or feeling guilty because others have worse problems than my own?

For me (ME), I focus on myself. I try to make friends. I ask a girl out. I want to run for BOSS next year. I'm going to a Debate Tournament. I'm going to BC for band. These are things that are important to me, and things that I value. In comparison to starvation and pandemics, are they miniscule and inferior? YES. No doubt about that. All I'm saying is that really does not change the fact that I continue to focus on them.

And - in life - I am in it for me, more than anyone. I don't think that's self-centred and ignorant. This is MY life. I make the decisions. I care about myself more than others. That's a fact of life; instinct; survival. In 20 years, many of those in starvation will be dead. But I'll be working at an office, stressed out of my mind because Joe didn't send me the transcript that I need for a presentation. I am one person; a speck on the globe. Yet that speck is what I care about most.

Posted: Mon Feb 27, 2006 4:35 pm

I see what you mean. You don't let things that don't affect you greatly or directly slow you down?

True, we feel bad for those who are less fourtunete. But we have to worry about ourselves some or most of the time and we can let constant worries cloud our judgement or set us off our course, our future.

Hm, I didn't word that well. I keep rounding the corner instead of just stepping on it.

Xeroxer

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Xeroxer

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Posted: Mon Feb 27, 2006 4:36 pm

Why does everything I write are on the last posts

Posted: Mon Feb 27, 2006 4:57 pm

Spamster

Mozzarella

Leiko - wink <333.((And it is P.P.S.; Post Post Script.)

Morgan (Spamster)-- This is something I am firm on. We do influence each other. And I think it is self centred to make decisions based on the fact that I am only in this for me; though it is out human instinct, and vital for basic survival. But really.... How can you possibly feel like a good person when you are sitting in your home, upset because of something as trivial as.....anything, when people on the other side of the globe (not the other side of the universe), are counting down the moments until their villages are burned, or until they die from AIDS, or until they die from starvation? Clearly, we CAN change this; we do control it. We have seen it throughout history, time and time again. When the western world does want to make something happen, when they want to change something, they do. And this change does not start with nationwide action, it starts with individuals, and collaboration. Small acts of charity may have small results, but results they are nonetheless.

Quote:

And then there's the people that think that they're inhumanely terrible because there's people starving in another continent. Sure, that's unfortunate. Sure, it shouldn't be happening. But - honestly - that impacts my life in nearly no way, whatsoever.

I don't think I'm inhumanly terrible, I simply feel selfish for holding my trivial conflicts above human lives and immense suffering I cannot fathom. These people's lives may not have huge effects over us, but our actions and choices can change their lives.

Okay, it was a bad choice of words to say that those starving do not affect us at all. That's false, I realize that. But I can honestly say, that - in the past months (years) - I have never been truly influenced, hurt, or profoundly affected by those in starvation and poverty, aside from the occasional Geography presentation.

Here's what it comes down to for me, what do I value more: focusing on my life, and my own problems, or feeling guilty because others have worse problems than my own?

For me (ME), I focus on myself. I try to make friends. I ask a girl out. I want to run for BOSS next year. I'm going to a Debate Tournament. I'm going to BC for band. These are things that are important to me, and things that I value. In comparison to starvation and pandemics, are they miniscule and inferior? YES. No doubt about that. All I'm saying is that really does not change the fact that I continue to focus on them.

And - in life - I am in it for me, more than anyone. I don't think that's self-centred and ignorant. This is MY life. I make the decisions. I care about myself more than others. That's a fact of life; instinct; survival. In 20 years, many of those in starvation will be dead. But I'll be working at an office, stressed out of my mind because Joe didn't send me the transcript that I need for a presentation. I am one person; a speck on the globe. Yet that speck is what I care about most.

Of course, you will always be the most important to you, that can never change for anyone. I don't think this is self centred. I think that disregarding the pain and suffering of others because it "doesn't effect you" is niave and self centred.

I simply feel that my obsessing and fretting about trivial things like the debate tournament on saturday, or my french test I probably failed, or whether or not the boy over there really told suzy - jo I smell is trivial in comparison to what is happening to people in third world countries.

Helps to keep things in perspective. 3nodding

Mozzarella

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Xeroxer

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Posted: Mon Feb 27, 2006 5:08 pm

We're not being ignorant. We're just saying, why worry about people that hardly affects us.

Sure, when a food drive starts up, we donate. To be courterious or generous. But I, for one, don't intend to shift my thoughts or plans because of people who aren't thinking of me.

Posted: Mon Feb 27, 2006 5:13 pm

@Xero; I really am not just being sympathetic towards Victoria; I've been through all she has been through, and more. Just on different levels, I guess.

She said to fix it, but never did anything to try and fix it or anything. I'm not much better.

Not really in the mood to continue on since I'm tired XDXD <3

And I thought it was PPS =P

Tamasaki Leiko

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Xeroxer

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Posted: Mon Feb 27, 2006 5:23 pm

Tamasaki Leiko

@Xero; I really am not just being sympathetic towards Victoria; I've been through all she has been through, and more. Just on different levels, I guess.

She said to fix it, but never did anything to try and fix it or anything. I'm not much better.

Not really in the mood to continue on since I'm tired XDXD <3

And I thought it was PPS =P

Post-Post-script. That sounds right too :3

So none of you feel really determined or willing to actually solve the problem. Maybe you just don't think it's worth it. Despite what you've experienced in the past with her.

Lol, I write something huge and I get a little paragraph as a reply xD I'm so used to that :3 <3

You're not simply being sympathetic, as some may see it. But you just don't feel as down as she does. You might want to feel as bad as she does, which illusions your feelings. But it's not the same thing.

Posted: Mon Feb 27, 2006 7:11 pm

Well Pac~man and I had an arguement today and it ended up us saying Your momma jokes to Eachother. sweatdrop rofl

[~Paper~]

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Xeroxer

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Posted: Wed Mar 01, 2006 4:07 am

Do you think it's possible that some do enjoy drama?

I enjoy a little drama, spices up my life. But, these days. It's not the drama I've been searching for. I've always said: "Those who are interested in other people's dramas, don't have enough of their own." Think it's true?

I think they like the attention. We all do, including myself, sadly. I always wanted to be the guy who's there, but never seen. Who speaks, but never talks.

I guess I don't really have a theory today, I'm at a blank sweatdrop

Edit: But why want drama during your teenage and childhood? You have all life to create drama, why not just be happy and avoid problems when you can. Too many confrontations.

Y'know, it's only recent that I began feeling or at least stop hiding from my feelings. I used to persuade myself that crying is a weakness, a bit cliche I know. But I've kept up with that charade for about 9 years. Even through the deaths of about 4 family meembers, not a tear drop.

"What you don't feel in pain, you feel from anger" This is just a personal issue, that has simmered down. What you don't feel in sadness , you get angry and frustrated. Ironic as it is, that must be why they ryhme. Hehe. I'm sure everyone noticed that.

That's it really. I'm a bit slow in the morning, my apologies.

Posted: Wed Mar 01, 2006 4:44 am

Quote:

Firday, August 19, 1999: "So tell me... what do you want to be when you grow up?"

-When I'm all big?

-Uh-huh, what do you see?

-Nothing...

-You have no dreams?

-I wanna be happy.

I'm not going to explain my previous quote.

I saw a commercial. Kids were telling what they wanted to be when they grew up. They all named jobs.

Jobs? Wouldn't they rather be successful? Succesful can mean in their family relationships, in their mind, anywhere, including their job.

But all they named is their jobs? Why? Will they be happy doing that job for 40-60 years? Can we deduce that the money they will recieve will make them happy? Or that doing something they enjoy that will support the family they love is something to be happy about.

I'm stumped.

Xeroxer

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Xeroxer

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Posted: Wed Mar 01, 2006 5:43 am

"I don't want the world to see me, because I don't think they'd understand..."

I'm going to be honest and sincere: I hate people. I'm more like reffering to the common population. Stubborn, arrogant and all-around easy to manipulate.

I hate most of them, they are many exceptions <3 Which is what I strive live for, I live to find them. Great minds think alike :3

Anyhoo, like I said. I hate the common man, but I love what they make. I love solving their problems because it's a challenge. Most of the time, the person is either ignorant to the obvious solution, stubborn to actually to do it (I hate stubborness) or just wants the attention and sympathy.

The keyword to all of these social problems is adaptation (which was the word I was looking for a few posts back of mine). Without adaptation, no one could stand each other's styles of living.

I also love the art they can project on paper, the music they steer with their two arms or the voices that seem sirens' can't even be compared to.

Guess you gotta live with things that you love and you hate. No balance otherwise.

Another short thought. I wish I had something really good.

Edit: Phew, thought I'd start getting boring and repetitive: An example: The common teenager would say: Why do we have school? I school. We don't learn anything useful?

A. They're not seeing farther then their own wants.

B. They don't think at all, just think with their opinions. As Sherlock Holmes said: "Sometimes we twist the truth so our theories (In this case, opinions) can ring true"

Let's get this straight. Teachers aren't teaching you much but the basics like Math and grammar and the rest of the classes are just introductions. In case you take a study in those subjects you won't be a total Newbie.

The true things you learn throughout your whole school yearS is cooperation, you learn to cooperate with other classmates, you also learn motivation, determination, how to organize your time (your agenda) , discinpline, the basics of effect and consequences (detention) Gain althetics abilities, build your creative mind, etc. etc.

The teachers don't teach you this, but you do gradually. If you stayed at home, I don't you'd learn these as fast. You'd learn them, but it would take a good 20 years to actually get somewhere.

Posted: Wed Mar 01, 2006 2:00 pm

I wanted to talk about stuff yesterday, but I guess the guild being down ruined everything.

And I wanted to talk about something today, but I deleted the long post again. It was probably longer than my previous one with all my thoughts about Victoria.

So I'll talk about something else now. Some random thing, which I probably can't even focus on. My mind's still wandering back to the post I was going to post before, but I just couldn't press that little colorful submit button.

More relationship ponderings, how exciting.

Rodan and I don't talk much, it's almost pathetic. I talk to him probably the least out of all of my friends. And I'm saying all of them. We'll see each other in the halls, and just flash a smile. Simple as that.

We still haven't told anyone we're going out, maybe that's the reason. Now I'm kind of wondering why. It'd be easier to talk to him, and hug him at school if people knew. Then it wouldn't be some conspiracy thing.

He'll hold my hand on the bus, making sure no one will see us or anything, and after that we just kind of flash each other a small look everytime we walk pass each other.

He told me two days ago he was sorry he wasn't acting loving that day. He said the next time he had a chance alone with me, he'd hold onto me and never let go.

It made me really happy, but at the same time it's like "Wait- Is it shameful to hang out with me at school then? Do your friends hate me, or something? What's stopping you? Why are we keeping this from people again?"

What a great relationship. I can't bring up this topic either when I'm talking to him. I don't know why, I always want to. I'll even open my mouth to speak, but then I'll just close it and decide against it. Maybe this is just the way he wants it. In that case, I won't go against his wishes about that.

I asked him how many people knew once, and he said none. I said I didn't tell anyone either, and he told me people have been asking, but he just blew them off and made them think otherwise. I like keeping secrets though since my school has no privacy at all, but sometimes clingy little me will miss him near me when he's right there, pretending like nothing's happening.

And it's not like he doesn't care, he's told me so many times he would never hurt me, but I can't help but doubt everything.

Even after crew practice when we'll wander off, someone will try to tag along. No privacy, like I said before. He puts his arm around me then sometimes I guess, but it's still a 'not around friends' type of thing.

Nothing important to really say I guess. Just random pointless thoughts from a paranoid and insecure idiot <3

Tamasaki Leiko

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Xeroxer

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Posted: Wed Mar 01, 2006 3:23 pm

No offense, but your problem sounds dumb.

If you yearn so much to be with him in public than just do it and don't make it some mutual agreement, just do it. Kiss in front of everyone. If they ask questions, be sarcastic and tell them their eyes aren't decieved.

Though, I guess that'd be rushing in n_n;

If none of you are willing to bring the subject than maybe none of you are suffering enough?

Only those who had enough will truly motivate them. I don't see any other explanation. And detailing it to me doesn't mean poo. Especially since you are suppose to be convincing yourself. I'm not you and I can't make you do things, I can only influence you through logic and theories xD

And now, to go out to eat and collect some more ideas <3

I'm glad you come here Leiko. Your problems don't challenge me like others. But they light up sides of life I don't dare to go spelunking in 3nodding (Ick, love) 4laugh heart

Posted: Wed Mar 01, 2006 3:26 pm

I agree it's a dumb problem XDXD

I guess we just agreed to keep it from everyone till it's been a month. Just for fun. I finally talked to him.

Anywayyyy, I don't like to post my challenging problems on here, I guess. Thus why I deleted the entire thing I was going to post here.

I'm glad my stupid problems [Probably the smallest I experience in life XD] that I actually post do SOMETHING for Xero =P <333

Tamasaki Leiko

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Kimiko-ue
Crew

Big Lunatic

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Posted: Wed Mar 01, 2006 3:32 pm

At least you're able to be with the person you have a relationship with sweatdrop I don't get to see the person i like at all, he's in boarding school, but we still "have feelings for each other" as my friend put it. Apparently she finds out everything *3* [/hetoldherhaha]

I personally can't stand kissing :B it's really gross. like, you're mooshing germs into each other's mouthes. Sorry, but my school is like a free porn video. Just go to lunch and walk to the far corner and see what i'm talking about :B

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