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 Posted: Thu Mar 03, 2011 3:21 pm
--Untoten Kase-- Sink your teeth into forever...Okay.. I'm not saying this in a mean way, but... you can just... get over it.
They're words, and yes sometimes they hurt, but they're only words...
Trust me, I've been called a piece of s**t by my dad if I try to say my part of anything. I've been called a b***h. Hell, I've been called a c*nt by my brother.
But I'm over it. Sure, I was mad or pissed or even sad at the minute it happened. But I love my parents, and I'm not gonna let a few words hurt me. My brother, I can't stand him the least bit, but I live.
Anyway, some words can affect emotions at times, but it's not like it's gonna kill you.
Unless this is a daily thing, then don't worry about it and just forget about it.
If it is daily, then I'd suggest some kind of family therapy or counseling. ...Sunlight burns, children surrender. easier said then done
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Posted: Thu Mar 03, 2011 3:39 pm
ah, I know how you feel.
When I told my mom that I was going out to hang out with one of my friend's, she got mad because she wanted to go somewhere (She's disabled, so she can't do much by herself)
When I told her I already planned it out and I had to go, she started swearing at me, calling me a 'Useless f***ing piece of sh*t'. It actually made me feel like crying, but I left anyways x.x
Anyways, most of the time I pretend it never happened.
And so does she.
But for once I'd like to hear her say sorry...
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Posted: Thu Mar 03, 2011 3:39 pm
iRuben --Untoten Kase-- Sink your teeth into forever...Okay.. I'm not saying this in a mean way, but... you can just... get over it.
They're words, and yes sometimes they hurt, but they're only words...
Trust me, I've been called a piece of s**t by my dad if I try to say my part of anything. I've been called a b***h. Hell, I've been called a c*nt by my brother.
But I'm over it. Sure, I was mad or pissed or even sad at the minute it happened. But I love my parents, and I'm not gonna let a few words hurt me. My brother, I can't stand him the least bit, but I live.
Anyway, some words can affect emotions at times, but it's not like it's gonna kill you.
Unless this is a daily thing, then don't worry about it and just forget about it.
If it is daily, then I'd suggest some kind of family therapy or counseling. ...Sunlight burns, children surrender. easier said then done Have you ever been picked on at school? Cause you have to do the same thing. Ignore it. It's way easier than it sounds if you give it a try.
Just tell yourself "I'm not gonna let anything hurt me. I'll stand strong, and if people are gonna treat me wrong, then whatever. They're wasting their time" ...Sunlight burns, children surrender.
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Posted: Thu Mar 03, 2011 3:42 pm
iRuben tina138 iRuben tina138 What does she do that makes you lose respect for her? she doesnt have a job and she always asking me for money she says she going to pay me back and she never does im the one with the job so idk how im the lazy one Is that all? She doesn't have a substance abuse problem or anything? (please note you don't have to answer this if you feel is embarrassing or too hurtful. I'm just trying to get a feel for how your home life is.) her problem is she cant control her anger and when she does get angry she points the anger straight at me Ok, my mother, rest in peace. When I was younger she was an alcoholic. She thought wild things that my stepfather (respectively my father) that he was going to kill her for her money, or what ever. They pretty much physically fought alot. Several times while she was drunk shes held knives to my neck, threatened to kill me on numerous occasions. Luckily she quit drinking. Come my high school career, she took up a habit of taking muscle relaxers, somas, lorsets so forth. Well it led her back to drinking and at that point I had gotten brave. I yelled back and told her bad thing cause I had lost all respect for her. I decided college wasn't for me and I needed to move out and get a job after high school. Well I did that. I moved in with my friends family and got a job and a nice relationship. We were in the area and I wanted my mom and father to meet the person I was dating. When I saw her she looked like death. About three months after that my pops finds me and tell me she passed away from heart problems. It was sudden so none of us saw it coming. At the time I didn't think anything of it. Hell, I didn't have respect for her. Now three years later I regret not resolving my issues with my mother. I in fact miss my mom, I regret not asking her the things I should be asking her but instead asking my god mother. Trust what some of us have said and don't take your mommy for granted. Cause you never know when she might...well lets say she won;t do that til a long time after you have kids.
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Posted: Thu Mar 03, 2011 3:42 pm
1The Dead Girl1 ah, I know how you feel. When I told my mom that I was going out to hang out with one of my friend's, she got mad because she wanted to go somewhere (She's disabled, so she can't do much by herself) When I told her I already planned it out and I had to go, she started swearing at me, calling me a 'Useless f***ing piece of sh*t'. It actually made me feel like crying, but I left anyways x.x Anyways, most of the time I pretend it never happened. And so does she. But for once I'd like to hear her say sorry... same here
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Posted: Thu Mar 03, 2011 3:44 pm
tina138 iRuben tina138 iRuben tina138 What does she do that makes you lose respect for her? she doesnt have a job and she always asking me for money she says she going to pay me back and she never does im the one with the job so idk how im the lazy one Is that all? She doesn't have a substance abuse problem or anything? (please note you don't have to answer this if you feel is embarrassing or too hurtful. I'm just trying to get a feel for how your home life is.) her problem is she cant control her anger and when she does get angry she points the anger straight at me Ok, my mother, rest in peace. When I was younger she was an alcoholic. She thought wild things that my stepfather (respectively my father) that he was going to kill her for her money, or what ever. They pretty much physically fought alot. Several times while she was drunk shes held knives to my neck, threatened to kill me on numerous occasions. Luckily she quit drinking. Come my high school career, she took up a habit of taking muscle relaxers, somas, lorsets so forth. Well it led her back to drinking and at that point I had gotten brave. I yelled back and told her bad thing cause I had lost all respect for her. I decided college wasn't for me and I needed to move out and get a job after high school. Well I did that. I moved in with my friends family and got a job and a nice relationship. We were in the area and I wanted my mom and father to meet the person I was dating. When I saw her she looked like death. About three months after that my pops finds me and tell me she passed away from heart problems. It was sudden so none of us saw it coming. At the time I didn't think anything of it. Hell, I didn't have respect for her. Now three years later I regret not resolving my issues with my mother. I in fact miss my mom, I regret not asking her the things I should be asking her but instead asking my god mother. Trust what some of us have said and don't take your mommy for granted. Cause you never know when she might...well lets say she won;t do that til a long time after you have kids. im sorry for your loss
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Posted: Thu Mar 03, 2011 3:47 pm
iRuben tina138 iRuben tina138 iRuben tina138 What does she do that makes you lose respect for her? she doesnt have a job and she always asking me for money she says she going to pay me back and she never does im the one with the job so idk how im the lazy one Is that all? She doesn't have a substance abuse problem or anything? (please note you don't have to answer this if you feel is embarrassing or too hurtful. I'm just trying to get a feel for how your home life is.) her problem is she cant control her anger and when she does get angry she points the anger straight at me Ok, my mother, rest in peace. When I was younger she was an alcoholic. She thought wild things that my stepfather (respectively my father) that he was going to kill her for her money, or what ever. They pretty much physically fought alot. Several times while she was drunk shes held knives to my neck, threatened to kill me on numerous occasions. Luckily she quit drinking. Come my high school career, she took up a habit of taking muscle relaxers, somas, lorsets so forth. Well it led her back to drinking and at that point I had gotten brave. I yelled back and told her bad thing cause I had lost all respect for her. I decided college wasn't for me and I needed to move out and get a job after high school. Well I did that. I moved in with my friends family and got a job and a nice relationship. We were in the area and I wanted my mom and father to meet the person I was dating. When I saw her she looked like death. About three months after that my pops finds me and tell me she passed away from heart problems. It was sudden so none of us saw it coming. At the time I didn't think anything of it. Hell, I didn't have respect for her. Now three years later I regret not resolving my issues with my mother. I in fact miss my mom, I regret not asking her the things I should be asking her but instead asking my god mother. Trust what some of us have said and don't take your mommy for granted. Cause you never know when she might...well lets say she won;t do that til a long time after you have kids. im sorry for your loss Don't be, I'm passed it. Just don't lose respect for your mother. She did push out of her tummy and what not.
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Posted: Fri Mar 04, 2011 12:45 pm
tina138 iRuben tina138 iRuben tina138 Is that all? She doesn't have a substance abuse problem or anything? (please note you don't have to answer this if you feel is embarrassing or too hurtful. I'm just trying to get a feel for how your home life is.) her problem is she cant control her anger and when she does get angry she points the anger straight at me Ok, my mother, rest in peace. When I was younger she was an alcoholic. She thought wild things that my stepfather (respectively my father) that he was going to kill her for her money, or what ever. They pretty much physically fought alot. Several times while she was drunk shes held knives to my neck, threatened to kill me on numerous occasions. Luckily she quit drinking. Come my high school career, she took up a habit of taking muscle relaxers, somas, lorsets so forth. Well it led her back to drinking and at that point I had gotten brave. I yelled back and told her bad thing cause I had lost all respect for her. I decided college wasn't for me and I needed to move out and get a job after high school. Well I did that. I moved in with my friends family and got a job and a nice relationship. We were in the area and I wanted my mom and father to meet the person I was dating. When I saw her she looked like death. About three months after that my pops finds me and tell me she passed away from heart problems. It was sudden so none of us saw it coming. At the time I didn't think anything of it. Hell, I didn't have respect for her. Now three years later I regret not resolving my issues with my mother. I in fact miss my mom, I regret not asking her the things I should be asking her but instead asking my god mother. Trust what some of us have said and don't take your mommy for granted. Cause you never know when she might...well lets say she won;t do that til a long time after you have kids. im sorry for your loss Don't be, I'm passed it. Just don't lose respect for your mother. She did push out of her tummy and what not. that may be true but i wasnt born for her to curse at me
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Posted: Sat Mar 05, 2011 1:02 am
I'm sorry honey. That really sucks and I know it probably hurts twice as bad because you really want the realtionship to work.
I have a similar problem with my father and I find walking away and entertaining myself for a few hours to be the best thing because when I fight back or just sit there and take it it things escalate and get bad.
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Posted: Sun Mar 06, 2011 8:56 pm
My mom does this to me all the time. Usually if something bad happens she comes crying to me, and if I don't completely agree with her, I get used as a punching bag while she's upset.
It was probably just a fit a rage and you happened to be there. Wrong place wrong time.
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Posted: Sun Mar 06, 2011 8:58 pm
Tell her you love her and help her clean the house, make her dinner all in the same week
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Posted: Sun Mar 06, 2011 8:59 pm
Caselli I'm sorry honey. That really sucks and I know it probably hurts twice as bad because you really want the realtionship to work. I have a similar problem with my father and I find walking away and entertaining myself for a few hours to be the best thing because when I fight back or just sit there and take it it things escalate and get bad. i try walking away but then my mom jsut screams more at me...
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Posted: Sun Mar 06, 2011 9:00 pm
Trayne My mom does this to me all the time. Usually if something bad happens she comes crying to me, and if I don't completely agree with her, I get used as a punching bag while she's upset. It was probably just a fit a rage and you happened to be there. Wrong place wrong time. srsly im always in the wrong place :l
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Posted: Mon Mar 07, 2011 1:57 pm
iRuben her problem is she cant control her anger and when she does get angry she points the anger straight at me As I was reading through this thread, that's actually exactly what I was thinking the problem most likely was. It sounds to me like it's not you that your mother's mad at; if you're financially supporting her more than she's supporting you, then I highly doubt you're actually doing anything wrong or anything that angers her. I strongly suspect that whenever she gets upset about her life, or stressed, or mad at one of her friends or somebody else who she can't scream & curse at, she takes all those negative emotions out on you instead of dealing with the source of her anger, etc. directly. I know that that doesn't make it any easier to handle dealing with her when she's freaking out at you; but hopefully if you focus on the fact that even though she's insulting you out loud it's really herself that she's upset with, it will help you to stay a bit more calm & not get quite as personally invested. Also, when your mother gets like this, is there ever any opportunity during which you'd be able to just leave the house & leave her for a bit? If this situation was different, I'd advice you to just walk away from it all, but I have a feeling that your mother is not unlike mine when she gets angry, & that she'd just keep on following you. If there's any way for you to force her to have some time alone to calm down, though, that would probably help immensely. ... Also, do you have any siblings, by the way? &, if so, how are they treated in comparison to you? ... I ask because, depending on the answers that you give to that, I may be able to tell you some things that would likely interest you quite a bit Anyway, I know how rough it is to deal with a mother who freaks out like yours seems to, but you've still got your life & your future & your health... as cliche as it may sound, just try your best to appreciate all the good times you have & experience them to their fullest, & try & think of this nonsense with your mother as an unplesant experience you have to go through, & although it really sucks, it always ends, & things always keep moving forward.
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Posted: Mon Mar 07, 2011 2:07 pm
iRuben Caselli I'm sorry honey. That really sucks and I know it probably hurts twice as bad because you really want the realtionship to work. I have a similar problem with my father and I find walking away and entertaining myself for a few hours to be the best thing because when I fight back or just sit there and take it it things escalate and get bad. i try walking away but then my mom just screams more at me... If when you start to walk away your mother not only keeps screaming at you but also follows you, then I'd highly advise you to forget trying to walk away, since that could likely aggravate her even more, & escalate the situation to a point at which things turn physical. It sounds like your mother is like my parents: when they're bad & want to yell, they want to yell, & they want a "scapegoat", or somebody to yell at & have an emotional response to their yelling. They need to be heard (at least that's how they feel or something). Generally, walking away is the best thing to do in such situations, but every time in my life that I've begun to realize I couldn't get away from my parents cause they kept following me, those were the times when things got violent.
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