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 Posted: Sun Jul 25, 2010 4:00 pm
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Posted: Sun Jul 25, 2010 4:10 pm
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Posted: Mon Jul 26, 2010 2:09 pm
Oh God! I'm dying from laughter! Which is distracting my boyfriend from his game, which make me even more amused...
If Charles is a quarter vampire (vampyre? vympyre? because nouns are so old fashioned when replaced with Ys), can he have a servant who's one quarter Igor?
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Posted: Mon Jul 26, 2010 2:13 pm
HA HA SHANE I'm laughing at you, but mostly at the butt skirts
What's... Igor? *takes notes*
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Posted: Mon Jul 26, 2010 2:30 pm
Igor is the stereotypical, sometimes hunchbacked, always pretty ugly, definitely lisping minion who follows around the vampire. Catchphrase: 'yeth mathter/mithtreth', or *creepy laugh*. Terry Pratchet has satirised this character type to ridiculous levels of hilarity in the discworld book focusing on vampires.
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Posted: Mon Jul 26, 2010 2:36 pm
Oh! Well, why should I even try if PRACHET has already done it...? But of course, now I really must have a minion.
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Posted: Mon Jul 26, 2010 5:54 pm
Chapter Four
Bump let out a sigh. A soft breeze caressed her cheek, as she wished the Adonis-looking Charles had done. Charles Ewdard Mullet. The name was fit for a king, and if she had her way, it would be so. And she would be Princess Izabumpella Beautiful Suzuki-Chan Mullet-Silverstar.
She patted her butt skirt into place--it was a little hard to stretch back that far--and reclined over the railing of the canal outside Madame Mullet's mansion.
Charles Mullet had disappeared for three weeks after she'd first seen him. Since then, every thought and dream she had was of him. His smoldering topaz orbs, his statuesque figure. Every night he was in her dreams, balancing on a gondola and saying 'punt! punt!'.
"Oh, how romantic!" Bump gasped.
Suddenly, there was an EXPLOSION!
The force sent Bump sprawling over the railing side! Her eyes widened! The canal looked clear and pure! She was falling toward it! She would fall in the water! No! Not her butt skirt!
What would she do if she lost her butt skirt? This was the largest she currently had. It was the only one larger than Madame Mullet's skirts, and she'd been working for years to wear such a magnificent bustle. It was elegant red velvet and silk, covered in lace. The folds folded so elegantly. What would she do if she lost her butt skirt?
Her bosom heaved with a sob as she fell through the air. As she fell through the air, her mind reeled, in fear and sadness. The water was coming closer! Oh, why hadn't she fallen in yet? She imagined it: the water would surround her, destroy her skirt, and deliver a great splash. And OH! her skirt!
Suddenly, a gondola appeared beneath her!
"Punt, punt!" said the man below, as he raised his muscled, thick arms to catch her. And oh! she was saved! They hugged. She began to sob into his chest, clutching him, as he embraced her. The hug was one of desperation and relief.
"Art thou all right?" came a voice like soft wet velvet heaven.
She looked into his topaz eyes. She'd recognize that butt chin anywhere!
It was..............................................................
CHARLES!
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Posted: Tue Jul 27, 2010 7:22 am
I should correct myself: Pratchett. Two Ts.
You should do it anyway - I just gave that as an example to give you an idea of the character type I meant.
I'm so glad her butt skirt was saved!
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Posted: Tue Jul 27, 2010 7:23 am
That's fine. =3 I spell things wrong all the time! (And leave zeroes out.)
I am also glad that her butt skirt was saved.
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Posted: Tue Jul 27, 2010 7:59 am
Such a magnificent butt-skirt...
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Posted: Tue Jul 27, 2010 8:14 am
Maybe I'll post some illustrations up...
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Posted: Tue Jul 27, 2010 9:10 am
THIS STORY.
I MEAN, SERIOUSLY.
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Posted: Tue Jul 27, 2010 9:14 am
Contemplating if there should be horrific tiger sex or just epic fade to blacks...
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Posted: Tue Jul 27, 2010 2:25 pm
You've just triggered memories of that scene in Forbidden Fruit of gay panda sex, that never should have been unearthed. scream
Illustrations are needed. biggrin
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Posted: Tue Jul 27, 2010 2:28 pm
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH NOT WHAT I MEANT NOT WHAT I MEANT XD As soon as I finish all of this stuff, I'll start on some butt skirt practice. =D Also, tiger sex is a reference to My Inner Life. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cKzJ9_oKnCs
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