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Yeu curses at the weather under his breath, why the hell now?

"Get the pump up and running unless you all wanna be fish food!" He yells at the people around him. But he really can't blame them, it has been raining none stop since he last send out his letter and they are now literally swimming in mud.

Another loud explosion rocks the camp and Yeu throws down his pen. "What the hell are you guys doing out there?" He yells. "I'm coming in five minutes and nothing better be on fire when I do!"

Quickly signing his letter, then realizing that the stamp would never stick on to the envelope because of the humidity, he fumbles for a pin and pins the stamp to the letter before heading out.

"I swear, I need better help..."

10.06.04
(Joint post with Wenyuan)

Tsukiba climbs up on the bed next to Junyi, then sets about calming his feelings and concentrating them into a feeling of quiet and rest. Instead of beaming thoughts at any consciousness in particular, he lets the atmosphere drift out of him gradually, subtly permeating the air.

Junyi heaves a huge sigh, rolling onto her side and throwing her arm around his waist. The thoughts helped immensely, and she could already feel herself relaxing as she took slow, deep breaths.

You know... sometimes pregnancy is this exciting, wonderful experience. ......And sometimes it sucks. She didn't even bother using her voice; for some reason, she was simply too drained to speak. Consider yourself lucky you don't have to go through it.

Tsukiba seems to recoil a bit at the touch, but he does not retreat and keeps up the stream of quiet feelings.

You didn't have to go through it, either. It was your choice, because you knew the joy of a new life would far outweigh the minor unpleasantness. Tsukiba's tone is somewhat patronizing, but also filled with sincere sympathy. He focuses the calmness on Junyi herself briefly, letting it swirl around her like a gentle stream.

Everyone wants what is just out of his reach.

Of course I didn't. I'm complaining now, but I already know it's worth it. Junyi smiles weakly. It's just when my emotions are running amok like this, the most insignificant unpleasantries just seem so... huge.

She then blinks at Tsukiba. ...Is this all right? I don't want to make you uncomfortable or anything; I can just hold onto a pillow if that'd be better. She suddenly pauses as Tsukiba's last statement begins to sink in. ...What do you mean, wanting what is just out of reach?

Tsukiba quotes: The grass always looks greener on the other side of the fence.

Tsukiba wriggles a bit. It's hard to concentrate with someone touching me. The pervading aura of calm is slightly dented by his discomfort.

...Sorry. Junyi releases Tsukiba and grabs one of the pillows instead. I just need something to hold right now. Yeu's not here, so... A small laugh escapes her lips. ...I didn't realize you didn't like being touched. You seem to have kids always climbing over you, so I didn't know...

A full-grown human woman is different than a bunch of skinny Porcelain kids. A wisp of sentiment like affection and rolling of the eyes escapes him.

Yeu should be back soon. It's difficult to tell whether Tsukiba means, "will be," or "ought to be." If the child is already this sociable, it will be hurt growing up without its proper father.

Tsukiba indicates he is not interested in pursuing this thread much further with a mental gesture, then begins to intensify the emotion, mixing into it an element of curiosity, and poking about cautiously.

...Hello!

There is a faint pang of recognition from the baby, and an echo of the greeting, although it's doubtful as to whether or not the baby understands it.

...Did you want to start on those lesson plans already or something? I don't know if the baby is developed enough to project on its own, let alone understand the concepts you want to teach.

I don't think her mind is developed enough to understand a lesson yet. That will come later.

Tsukiba then turns his attention away from Junyi, though not blocking her out. He sends a stream of happy and cheerful, energetic feelings towards the baby's consciousness, the very same one he often uses when establishing initial contact.

Surprisingly enough, the feelings returned are much more subdued and calm, although still cheerful.

......THAT'S new. Junyi's eyes widen somewhat.

Rather than explain to Junyi, Tsukiba concentrates on those feelings. As he did before, he examines them, absorbs them, then turns them around and reflects them back to the consciousness with a questioning tone added.

The thoughts are simply reflected back at Tsukiba, with questioning tone added to the questioning tone. The baby doesn't appear to be able to explain its actions; it simply does and asks questions to the best of its ability.

Tsukiba thinks on the response, then lets it slowly fade as he introduces a different thread of feelings--rather than cheerfulness, warmth and comfort, the feeling of being fulfilled. Not merely emotional, it also emcompasses physical sensations. As he sends it, he listens carefully. Perhaps if the baby recognizes these sensations, or does not recognize them, it can be discerned what stage of physical development it is in.

There is a long pause, and then a faint sensation of recognition of warmth and comfort. Fulfillment is lost on the baby, although it does add a sensation of its own; the feeling of bouncing.

Tsukiba frowns oddly. Bouncing..?

The baby doesn't seem to remember what exactly causes the bouncing, but it recognizes that it moves through the womb. The feeling resembles bouncing, but upon closer inspection, appears to have slight differences in sensation.

Tsukiba tilts his head a bit, and doesn't inquire further. All signs seem to indicate that although its mind is rapidly developing, the baby is not quite arranged like a humanoid yet.

Tsukiba very gently pokes with a feeling that isn't quite as pleasant as all the other ones he sends -- almost of worry, of something being slightly amiss, although it is strongly reinforced with a sense of company and protection. It is hoping for or wanting fulfilment, but perhaps the baby's mind is not far enough along to foresee this sort of fulfilment.

"What? What's wrong?" Junyi whispers, worry overriding her previous exhuastion.

Tsukiba shakes his head slightly at Junyi.

Maybe I can't 'teach' her, but she may learn to tell us what she needs.

There is another pause from the baby, and then the faint feeling that the "bouncing" is not at all unpleasant.

Tsukiba smiles faintly before again changing 'topics.' This time, it is again the familiar restful, relaxing, hypnotizing calm that he sends before cutting off contact, intended to lull the baby into a sleep-like state so that it will not object too much when Tsukiba leaves.

At this, Junyi yawns loudly. "So what do you think? I can't really pick up most of what the baby projects; it's too faint."

I don't think you need to worry too much. If the baby needs something, she will let you know, one way or another.

Tsukiba gradually fades out his thoughts to silence, and he sits there, looking sleepy himself.

"Get some sleep," Junyi mumbles, her eyelids drooping. "...I'm about to pass out, thanks to your mind tricks."

Tsukiba chuckles.

"Sleep well, you two," he murmurs, sliding off the bed and trudging off tiredly to the main room.

10.07.04 - Journal Entry
Junyi

The baby's chatter is getting louder and more frequent, but no more sophisticated. It's rather amusing, now; whenever I'm surprised by something or feel anything other than neutral emotions, the baby immediately blasts me with curiosity.

Already eager to leave the womb and explore, I see.

All concepts that don't relate to warmth or comfort are lost on it, though. However, it recognizes the difference between positive and negative emotions, and has attempted (clumsily) to comfort someone who was upset.

The morning sickness is almost completely gone, but I still don't look PREGNANT. I still just look chubby.

It's to be expected, however. As far as physical development goes, the baby is lagging far behind normal humans.

That'll change soon.

From the look of the letter, Yeu probably has his hands full taking care of something. He probably is quite agitated, it's better not to send any bad news his way right now, but he'll probably be even more agitated when he finds out someone's been hiding the truth from him.

10.09.04 - Journal Entry
Junyi

SOMEBODY has been playing catch-up, as far as growth goes.

It's like the baby decided to quadruple its size overnight, except without the quadrupling part, or something? In either case, I've looked things up; apparently it's nearly caught up in growth with a normal human baby. Must be Yeu's genes kicking in; go, baby, goooooo!

I've been ravenously hungry lately. It's gotten so bad that I've taken to fighting small children for bacon.

I'm glad I decided to mail order all those yukatas; they look funny on me, but they fit better than everything else I own.

There's a baby shower today, but I'm too tired to go at the moment. I'll make an appearance when I'm feeling more alert.

In extremely recent news, it feels like I have butterflies in my stomach. Perhaps the little Junling will one day become a soccer star.

10.13.04 - Journal Entry
Junyi

Too incoherent to write. Too incoherent to think. I have to do it anyway. I can't believe this is happening.

When it all came down to it, I couldn't even protect my child. I don't even know what the effects of some psychotic thief/mage on the baby are yet. It's been quiet. Too quiet. I'm already worried, and this is just making things worse.

If only I were as strong as Vilden or Tsukiba. If only I had finished that Construct for the baby. Too many "If only"s, but they don't change a thing.

Tsukiba and Yeu were hellbent on my not going to Dragonlamp, and I find it entirely ironic that the real damage was done where I'm supposed to feel the most safe. Perhaps I won't even leave home now.

....That's silly. I can't run. I can't act like a spoiled child about this.

Especially since that nice empress-lady is still in the clinic with her. I can't leave her alone, but I don't want to risk the baby's mind being violated again.

10.15.04
Joint post with Yeu


Once again, Junyi was asleep.

The furniture in the Aeya house wasn't comfortable, but Junyi hadn't slept in a while, and could've fallen asleep on a rock, for all she cared. All that mattered was that she was safe and away from her.

While she managed to remain calm, however, someone still wasn't able to. Faint projections of nightmares wafted around Junyi, but none of them from her.

The first thing Yeu felt when he entered the room was great discomfort. Blinking, he traced the foul emotions in the air to the sleeping form, or rather, inside the sleeping form.

Sending out a wave of soft warmth, he tried to comfort the nervous child.

The baby seemed to wake, and immediately shut itself off from Yeu.

The sensations, however, woke the mother.

Junyi slowly opened her eyes, yawning as she focused on...

"...It's about time you came back," she muttered, apparently oblivious to the baby's discomfort.

"I was busy." He complained but neverless bent over and kissed her on the forehead. "What happened?"

Junyi opened her mouth to answer, but instead of words, a strangled squeak erupted from her throat as the events from a few days ago raced through her mind.

Yeu dragged over a chair and silently watched her until she is ready to speak. He wass sure he's not going to like what she was about to tell him, but reminded himself that he should not scold her. She seemed to have suffered enough.

"I... Someone..." Junyi squeaked, hanging her head in shame. "I wasn't strong enough to stop someone from invading my mind. Or the baby's."

"Ah." He said. "Ahhh...."

"...They were... pretty bad," Junyi whispered. "...Bad enough to completely change the baby. It used to be so lively and... now it just won't open up to anyone but me or Tsukiba."

Yeu sat back in his chair silently for a bit. "You should have anticipated this." The man said as gently as he could without making it sound like a lecture. "You know the possibilities."

"I wasn't aware that I was supposed to lock myself away in the house so nothing bad would happen!" Junyi shot back angrily.

"Calm down." Yeu said gently. "Negative emotions are not good for the baby right now." He said as he held out his hand to her.

Junyi took Yeu's hand shakily, covering her eyes with her free hand. "I'm sorry."

"What we need to do right now is to make sure it won't happens again." Yeu continued gently. "Not lament on what's past."

"Tsukiba said he'd protect me," Junyi mumbled quietly. "I hope that's enough."

"I have a idea." He said slowly and reached into his pocket to pull out a gold locket. "This is something that was given to me when I was young and I didn't know how to control telepathy. It has the power to isolate one's mind." He puts the necklace in Junyi's hand.

"Wear it when you go outside. But remember, once you wear it, you might not be able to mentally communicate with the baby and vice versa. But at least no one can intrude upon him or her."

"...But... what about Tsukiba?" Junyi asked hesitantly. "And how will I talk to Boyan or Melody?"

"The old fashion way. Talking." Yeu shrugged.

"That's not fair to them," Junyi protested.

"And it's not fair to the baby to have to get it's mind raped without proper protection." Yeu frowned lightly as he tried to explain his reasoning. "I'm sure Melody, Boyan, and Tsukiba are willing to take the long way to ensure the baby's safety."

"I'll take it off around them," Junyi mumbled, putting the locket over her head.

"Whatever you think it's best." He nodded and placed one of his palms on Junyi's belly. "Now that's taken care of, how do I reach him or her?"

"...First I need to take the locket off," Junyi laughed. "But just be gentle. Remind the baby you're its father."

"I think that role's been taken by Tsukiba." Yeu said with a hint of dry humor.

"Tsukiba is more of an auntie," Junyi giggled, taking the locket off.

"I though gender confusion is suppose to take place after the confusion of self identity?" Yeu laughed.

"Well, you know Tsukiba." Junyi smiled warmly. "Try to communicate with the baby, but don't force anything."

"You know I would be much more comfortable teaching it about calculus right?"

Junyi sighed, pulling Yeu forward. "If I have to compromise, you have to compromise."

"Yes ma'am." He sighed, trying to remember the warmth that he had felt whenever he attached himself to his stuffed teddy bear when he was young and tried to send the sensation over to the unborn child.

"That's better," Junyi whispered, wrapping her arms around Yeu and closing her eyes.

Teddy bears, cotton candies, rubber duckies, chuchu trains... Yeu continued to go through the list of childhood toys and send the emotions he had when he played with the toys to the baby.

There was a faint projection of interest, but the baby didn't project much more than that.

"Try thinking about how you feel when you're with me?" Junyi offered helpfully.

"I'm trying to stay simple here." Yeu murmured.

"Toys aren't simple. Feelings of love are." Junyi winked at Yeu. "Unless all you feel around me is the urge to stab things?"

"That and growing gray hairs."

"But aren't you happy to be having a baby?"

"I was joking." He said with a light smile.

"But I'm serious."

"I am." Yeu nodded.

Junyi sighed, snuggling closer to Yeu. "Tell the baby that."

He concentrated again, and tried to send the joy he feels to the child.

There was a long pause, until finally...

............... biggrin ?

biggrin .

The baby tentatively prodded at Yeu's mind, still projecting somewhat happy emotions.

Yeu tried to keep his thoughts warm and gentle, like how one would feel laying under a soft spring sun.

After another pause, there was another faint projection- one that seemed to recognize that it was related somehow to Yeu.

The man slowly added a bit of intensity to the thoughts so that they were no longer of a soft pastel but taking on a bit brighter shade.

While there was no actual response to Yeu's thoughts, the baby did seem much happier. It simply reflected the thoughts back at Yeu, tinting them with its own perceptions of warmth and safety.

"...You and Tsukiba both..." Junyi muttered good-naturedly. "I can't even calm the baby down myself, it seems."

"You can barely calm youself down sometimes." Yeu replies and kissed Junyi again on the forehead. "But that's what I'm here for."

"Am I really that hopeless?"

"Just a bit too excitable."

"You know my kind is an emotional sort!"

"Calm down." He gestured to her. "I just got it to relax, don't get it too excitable again."

Junyi pouted. "I was just saying."

"And I'm saying I already knew that." Yeu said. "But at least it is easier to calm the baby down than trying to calm you down."

"Oh, I think it's pretty easy when you know what you're doing," Junyi answered coyly, giving Yeu a playful squeeze.

"Then obviously you are clueless." He teased.

"Good thing you're not."

"Amen."

Junyi lightly kissed Yeu's cheek. "I have everything packed already; do you have anything we can use to lug all my stuff to your place?"

"I leased a van."

"Is everything ready to go, then? Did you hire Yun for manual labor?"

"Actually, I haven't been able to get in contact with him."

"...You haven't been home yet?"

"No, I've been running around." He paused. "Which reminds me. Dragonlamp..."

Junyi's heart sank. "...What about it?"

"Don't do it again."

"Nothing happened," she protested.

"Still, don't. I will get angry next time." Yeu frowned deeply. He was so worried about junyi's safety that he had rushed home, throwing his work aside, something that he doesn't do easily.

"I... I'm sorry."

"As long as you learn your lesson." Yeu then stood up. "I probably stink like a skunk. I haven't had time to change my clothe yet."

"Do you want to wash up here? I still need to get a few things together."

"Do I have a change of clothing here?" Yeu looked around the room.

"...I might've borrowed a few of your things..." Junyi mumbled awkwardly.

"Can you fit?" Yeu arched his eyebrow curiously. "You are a inch taller than me."

"You wear looser clothes than I do. They fit."

"That is true." He turned to her. "Then may I have my stuff back?"

Junyi nodded slowly, her face turning pink.

"Why don't you get dressed?" Yeu suggested. "Wear something warm, it's getting cold outside."

"I'm already warm," Junyi argued, but still stood and began hunting for a jacket.

Yeu took that time to slip away for a much needed shower.

10.17.04 - Journal Entry
Junyi

It's over. It's all over.

I hope.

She returned, but this time, I was ready for her. I don't know what I was trying to accomplish, but I'm sure I wanted to simply drive her out so I could feel safe in the clinic again.

Instead, I might've scarred myself for life. At least the baby was safe from it all.

There's a huge gap in my memory. I remember confronting her, and another child and his parent (I don't know if she was his mother or his guardian or what) being present.

One second, I'm snarling at her, and the next, she'd pulled a knife. Someone else in the meantime had arrived and collapsed.

I, naturally, assumed she was threatening ME with the knife, but a few seconds later, she slashed her own face. I don't understand it.

When it was all over, I played baby-sitter to the boy (Whom I've learned is named Cyrus, and Boyan seems to have taken a liking to him), and we tried to play a game to take our minds off of everything.

Tsukiba doesn't seem to think that the locket is a good idea. After talking to Dr. Kamiki, I feel a lot safer in the clinic.

I've decided I'll only wear the locket when I feel the baby's mind would be in danger. I'm tired of being deaf. I'm tired of not being able to communicate with my voice AND my mind. I'm tired of not being able to sense my baby.

I hope it didn't do more harm than good.